You might be a redneck if you...
...have a washing machine on the porch.
...have more than one car on blocks.
...have a pool table in the kids' room.
...have a moonshine still in the guest bedroom.
...ever flunked an IQ test.
...take a bowling ball to a funeral.
...light fireworks by sparking your battery cables together.
...drink moonshine from a lemonade can at the church social.
...flip your burgers with a putty knife.
...clean your ears with a screwdriver.
...go deer hunting and miss opening day because of a hangover.
...keep pliers and a wrench in the sun visor.
...hold the fender or bumber onto your pickup with vise-grips.
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You are what you learn.
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