I finally gave up and ordered a M&P 40 with thumb safety. I have a 3913 stainless with the thumb safety and I'm used to the thumb safety.

I guess the most frustrating part of my whole ordeal with buying this S&W was that S&W employees didn't even know what SKU to have me order.

On the other hand S&W owners on this forum seem to know a bunch more than the factory. Thanks to everyone that answered my question.

Happy shooting and thanks again,
Spanky