If you train with it and can shoot it well, it's all good. I'm not a blind brand enthusiast. I know what works for me and what I prefer. I respect that others have different needs and preferences. Everything else being equal, a small 380 or small 45 will recoil more than a small 9mm such as a Shield sized gun. Can't escape physics.

Nothing against the 45. I'd like a small 45 for no good reason though. Shot placement and fast follow up shots over caliber.