Took my wife, a model 36 and a model 38 with a Hogue Monogrip, along with various test loads, starting with wadcutter target loads.
I'll cut to the chase. With the model 38, equipped with a Hogue Monogrip, my wife was able to handle stiff defense loads with minimum difficulty and said 'No problem'.
With the model 36, all steel, we shot the same loads as with the mod 38. I've got some Pachmayrs coming in soon that I hope will tame it down a bit.
With the original wooden grips the 36 felt worse to both of us than the mod 38 with the monogrip. I was really surprised because I didn't like shooting the model 38 at ALL with any load before adding the new grips.
