... my wife and I live "out" in the country and the local deputy sheriffs have a rule about answering a 911 call to our address, I have mentioned this before in the forums, the sheriff on duty makes the decision personally as to whether or not to respond to a 911 call from us.
I have spoken to the local deputy sheriffs about this before too, in fact, one of them was nice enough to inform me about this rule.
The fact is there are only 2 ways on to our property, both are 1 mile long driveways composed of dirt, gravel and sand. Both driveways are, surrounded by timber and are canopied over too. As the deputy explained to me either driveway constitutes an excellent ambush site and he was absolutely right about this. Now the chances of someone knowing where we live and wanting to do a home invasion here are pretty slim. On the other hand, we do have a really nice Mercedes convertible, one of the few in our neck of the woods. If a person were to go looking for an isolated place to do a home invasion, a person driving a Mercedes might appear a good target. (Fact is the Mercedes cost less than our truck did, I just made a really good deal on a nice car. Hey, we're old, we've both worked hard and since we had the money to buy the car outright and treat ourselves, we did. We're hardly "rich", ya know.)
Anyway, the point is I carry pretty much all of the time, if I hadn't, the "rabid fox" I shot the other weekend could still be out there presenting a threat to either our animals or someone else's animals or kids. I happened to have been awake all night and had the BG 380 in an IWB when I walked out onto the deck and there was the fox.
We live rural and as long as the grandkids aren't here there are guns placed around in strategic areas, but that's still steps away from where I am so having one with me at all times or within a few feet just makes sense. What can I say, I'm an old Boy Scout, you know, "Be Prepared". Most of the time my wife has no idea I'm even carrying the gun and I prefer it that way with everyone, the only one who needs to know I am carrying ... is me.
She never complains about it, she trusts my judgment and training, if I am carrying, I likely have a good reason to be. She also knows I have PTSD and can be hyper vigilant at times, again, she trusts me.
Ultimately, that's what it comes down to, trust.

This just hit me. Years ago, like 30 some years ago a friend's wife was at home about 3 PM waiting for her kids to come home from school. A man barged in her door, accompanied by a woman. They had just robbed a bank and wanted a car. She gave them the keys to her car and ... the man shot her in the head with a .22 revolver. This was in a nice rural/suburban neighborhood. Her kids came home from school and found Mom dead in their own kitchen. It was heartbreaking, but things like this happen. That is another reason that, at times, not all of the time, but a lot of the time I have my carry pistol on me at home.
Perhaps just having a really open heart to heart about this issue could clear it up, I have no idea, as I wouldn't know you from Adam.
I do wish you the best in working this out, good luck!

__________________
Tertia Optio