For a J-frame highly reccomend a 642, Wolff 13# rebound spring, Crimson Trace LG-350 grips, which besides offerring excellent targeting, really help reduce recoil.. Verify red dot accuracy once the grips are mounted, then good to go without need for a lot of range time.
I'm 70, shoot low round count each year(no ranges around, just woods) and every time I shoot it whatever that red dot pastes will get hit.
148 match wadcutters a very forgiving round on the hands, highly accurate, and two of those in the chest should discourage continued bad behavior.
Since giving up full size semi-auto carry a year ago, been my constant companion, either in pocket or waist. Like it so much, splurged on a Lobo offset AIWB holster that should be here on Monday.

With that said, when summer comes, a Kel-Tec P-32 will get some pocket time. Compact and light DAO pocket auto, highly reliable, soft shooter, and 8 rounds of .32 Fiocchi 73 gr FMJ is sufficient protection for a low threat environment.