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Old 04-28-2011, 10:54 PM
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Default A real woman

A real woman always keeps her house clean and organized, the laundry basket is always empty. She's always well dressed, hair done. She never swears, behaves gracefully in all situations and all circumstances. She has more than enough patience to take care of her family, always has a smile on her lips, and a kind word for everyone.

I think I might actually be a man.
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Old 04-28-2011, 11:12 PM
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You made Missus P&R Fan laugh.
Me too.
Congratulations, you have earned my second "Like".
Jim
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Old 04-29-2011, 12:45 AM
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It takes a woman to keep the house organized, but so long as a man's tools are organized in a way he can always find them- he's doing above average for this time in history.

There are only a few real women left...when I turn on the TV, my hunch is always confirmed. I happen to know one of them- my wife.
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Old 04-29-2011, 12:50 AM
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Oh, I'm a real woman all right. Just not a normal one.
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Old 04-29-2011, 05:36 AM
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Originally Posted by captorquewrench View Post
Oh, I'm a real woman all right. Just not a normal one.
Normal is overated and a lot less fun.
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Old 04-29-2011, 05:48 AM
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Originally Posted by captorquewrench View Post
I think I might actually be a man.
Well, there's one sure way to tell. Do your shirts button the wrong way?
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Old 04-29-2011, 06:23 AM
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This thread has me inspired to resume standin' while wizzin' once again.
Thank you.

(I don't know what that meant. Just got up. sorry.):-)

BTW mrs. captorquewrench, if you're a musician and follow the rules you presented, other musicians would be casting sidelong glances your way. Good on ya, ma'am.

ETA: About 10 years ago, I played in the backup band for a pedal steel festival and that Sunday morning, I saw a very prim and proper, tiny little 50's-ish looking woman walking down the hotel hall with a snare drum under her arm. Turns out there was a gospel group playing in the main hall that morning and she was on her way to the gig. That woman THREW DOWN!!!! Picture a Ronco Pocket June Cleaver possessed by Keith Moon. Just a little powerhouse! I couldn't help but giggle with amazement for 45 minutes watching her. She looked like at any moment, she was gonna get up from from behind the drumkit to check her casserole in the oven and vacuum the drapes. Delightful.

Last edited by beach elvis; 04-29-2011 at 06:47 AM.
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Old 04-29-2011, 06:27 AM
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Did you stop to wonder, "What does a weirdo think is weird"?
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Old 04-29-2011, 09:44 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by captorquewrench View Post
Oh, I'm a real woman all right. Just not a normal one.
Normal scares me.
Prim and proper women rarely make history
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Old 04-29-2011, 09:52 AM
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Your post was quite refreshing. More people, men and women,
should try living instead of conforming. Thanks for posting. TACC1
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Old 04-29-2011, 10:04 AM
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Well you certainly need to study up a bit. Don't worry my wife will beat me up for you.

The Good Wife's Guide
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Old 04-29-2011, 10:54 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by captorquewrench View Post
Oh, I'm a real woman all right. Just not a normal one.
Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?
<going to crate for time out>
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Old 04-29-2011, 11:09 PM
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Quote:
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Oh, I'm a real woman all right. Just not a normal one.
"Normal is a cycle on a washing machine."
John P. McAfee
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Old 04-29-2011, 11:16 PM
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normal; cycle; woman; washing machine...this thread's going nowhere fast
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Old 04-30-2011, 12:01 AM
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Veni, vidi, fecerunt insanos
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Old 04-30-2011, 01:09 AM
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You may or may not be normal; but that last post was educated, at least by this redneck Alabamian's standards; enough for me to not be able to decipher.
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Old 04-30-2011, 01:26 AM
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"I came, I saw, I made insane"
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Old 04-30-2011, 12:19 PM
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isn't that something little girls learn while growing up?
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Old 04-30-2011, 12:31 PM
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Wait..."women"..."normal"?
Same sentence?
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Old 04-30-2011, 07:27 PM
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Perazzi....it isn't learned, its instinctive in the female DNA....lol
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Old 04-30-2011, 09:15 PM
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A question was asked early so I will ask another. What is NORMAL? I think I am very normal but then again my wife dont think so. Then again neither does my kids. So the real question comes around whos definiation of normal are YOU?

Think about it?
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Old 04-30-2011, 09:27 PM
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Normal ain't what it used to be.

Think about that....
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Old 05-01-2011, 02:01 AM
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Quote:
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Normal ain't what it used to be.

Think about that....
Batstuff crazy is the new normal...
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Old 05-01-2011, 08:53 AM
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Love of God, Country & family is normal.

My insanity doesn't bother me, I enjoy every minute.
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Last edited by justsumstuff; 05-01-2011 at 08:58 AM. Reason: spelling correction
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Old 05-01-2011, 01:16 PM
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Times have changed, as this clipping will surely prove!

John

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Old 05-01-2011, 02:38 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TACC1 View Post
Your post was quite refreshing. More people, men and women,
should try living instead of conforming. Thanks for posting. TACC1
A-M-E-N!!!!!!!!!!!
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Old 05-01-2011, 07:38 PM
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The only thing Mrs. Houston ever made for dinner was reservations and cleaning is for "the help" and other people. My wife is more the supervisory type.
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Old 05-01-2011, 07:50 PM
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I've lived for many years by the words of the old country song, "I've always been crazy but it's kept me from going insane".
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Old 05-02-2011, 03:37 PM
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Thanks for the post. It's good to hear a woman who can be all that and have an interest in guns and other good stuff as well! Kinda like when my wife took up sporting clays and was dragging ME to the sporting goods stores looking for shotguns. Ah what a glorious time! Of course part of your success may be due to the fact that you're a Texian.
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Old 05-02-2011, 07:55 PM
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I have to show this one to my wife. If I am MIA afterward don't be surprised. LOL
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