Brandon,

I don't disagree with the responses that you have already received from other forum members. This is certainly a good start as this is "uncharted territory" for you. I've been through about a dozen of these proceedings with my own tax clients, and with friends. The best final outcomes resulted from those who keep their cool and kept it civil throughout the process.

Here's my take:

1. I agree with using the Internet. It's a great source for information, although it may not always be correct or reliable;

2. Utah is not a "community property" state, so that is not a consideration for you;

3. As others have already stated, be sure that you're not "outgunned" with your attorney, compared to hers. You need one that has the skills, knowledge, and experience to satisfactorily resolve cases like yours, in your favor, whenever possible;

4. Attorneys are not motivated towards an early resolution of issues/final divorce decree. The longer that the proceedings drag on the wealthier that they become;

5. Be sure to consult with a good CPA/tax preparer before your divorce is final. Most attorneys can't spell "taxes" or "CPA". Almost all divorces will have income tax implications for both of you, especially if you have filed a joint tax return in the past;

6. Document everything that has or will occur from this point forward. Written documentation is the strongest evidence in legal proceedings. Use it to your advantage!

7. As best that you can, keep it friendly throughout the entire process. You have everything to gain, especially financially and insofar as visitation rights with your son are concerned. Last year I had two clients who had to agree to amend/modify their final divorce decree eleven months after the fact. They were not acrimonious during the divorce process. They each saved almost $5,000 in income taxes;

8. Talk with other relatives, friends, co-workers, etc whom you trust. They may have information or knowledge which you can use to your advantage.

I hope that the information in this post may help you in some way.

__________________
That's what we do!