As others have said a FS 9mm is the way to go. If you can find one with a 5" barrel so much the better. M&P's of almost any caliber shoot softer than many comparable guns. This is due to the grip angle and low bore axis.

If you can rent one at a gun store try and see. Our Pro Series 9mm, which is actually my wife's gun, is almost .22ish in terms of felt recoil. Hope this helps!