My 2 1/2" 66-1 that I purchased in the mid-70's has had many thousands of full blown magnum rounds, and tons of 38's, fired through it over 35 years. It did develop some end shake which I cured with shims. It wears S&W RB targets now and it feels and shoots beautifully. My wife loves it, though she spent almost 8 years in the Army and is no beginner with firearms. She does not carry the 66, as we keep it at the ready in her bath room. Her carry piece is a 649 with Ahrends, loaded with 125 gr +P Hornaday XTP. During a serious social event most people don't notice recoil.
When it comes down to it the new shooter needs to try as many different weapons as possible and make that very personnel decision, and practice, practice, practice.