I realize this sounds crazy and weird, but are there any AK style handguards made for the AR? I prefer the ergonomics of the AK, but want the parts availability of the AR(yes I know the AK has a aftermarket following, but it's nowhere as big as the AR's).

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young and smart

You mean something like this?

AR-15 A2 FURNITURE SET FIXED LAMINATE | Brownells

or this?
Windham Weaponry Online - Laminated Hardwood 2 Piece Mid-Length Forend for AR15 / M16

Windham Weaponry Online - Laminated Hardwood 2 Piece Rifle Length Forend for AR15 / M16

Hey, I'm perverse enough, I like that first set.

But for the OP try a Magpul as mentioned above.