Hey Jesse,

You stupid moron! You cheated on Sandra Bullock?
How in the world can you be so stupid? You are married to one of the most beautiful women in the world.
She has a body to die for and her current wealth shadowed only by Oprah.
Your wife, recently beat out Julia Roberts in the polls and is now named "America's Sweetheart."

You also remember, she just won an Oscar and praised you up and down in front of the world while you were slipping around.

You are really a piece of work! You are the most hated cheating idiot on the planet!

How can you live with yourself?

I only have one thing to say to the despicable, miserable, cheating piece of **** that you are:

Thanks for taking the heat off of me.

Let’s do lunch,
Tiger Woods