Our 7 yr old son (it's my step son) has ADHD. If you know ADHD you also know how these kids can be.

When he was living with his daddy for 3month recently, he was playing call of duty with his dad In our house he only plays x-box for 1 hour on sat./sun. And we don't allow him to play such violent video games at all.

Of course he's bagging for a gun. If he sees the nerf commercial on tv... we have to turn it off or switch the channel. He transforms even his fingers (and what else he can find) in a gun

Now, we decided to buy him a Daisy BB rifle for christmas

But he's having his up's and down's.... so we don't really know if this was an good idea... because he just don't understand that he can hurt somebody, even himself with it

Has anybody a similar situation We are thankful for any advise.

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Jorge

Jorge, I think it is a good thing that you try to make your stepson happy. I think -- and I am just a regular guy and not someone who understands ADD -- that you need to be with the kid when he has the BB gun. Maybe only load one BB at a time. Maybe he will feel frustrated, but also, maybe, it will help him learn to focus. You cannot control what his biological father does with him, so just let that go. Focus on what you do with him.

My grandson has ADHD. At age 10 I bought him a 22 bolt action rifle. At first we shot it loading one at a time, now 2 years later he loads up the mag with 10 rds. He loves it and shoots it very well. His gun stays here at my house locked in the safe with the rest of my guns. I have taught him all the safety rules and we go over them before the range sessions. At the range I trust him to load and shoot it by himself as he shows that he is responsible.

I would have gone with the Nerf gun. My kids are destructive little terrors, but Nerf darts bounce off. Plus they eventually lose all their ammo.

My kids make guns out of Trio blocks, straws, whatever is handy. Which is odd, since they have a pile of toy guns. They also hide plastic silverware and refer to what they hideaway as "shanks". Smart kids.

Dollar General will sell you, for 15 dollars, a nice looking battery powered M4 clone. Doesn't shoot anything, but makes a decent sound. The charging handle makes a cocking sound when activated. You can even screw in the included suppressor and it changes the sound to a "pfft". It has a rail system and comes with a faux light, functional VFG and a toy scope that resembles an Aimpoint. The BUIS front post even moves up and down. Might want to look for one of those. Other than the sound gets annoying, they are fairly harmless.

It's all about supervision. Just be there when the BB gun is out. I have a daughter with all kinds of abbreviated diagnoses and I take her out to the bullet trap and let her shoot when she asks.

Well, I remember how my dad taught me. He grabbed me and an old beat up .380 and we went out to an isolated area, where we found quite a few small animals. He took aim and killed one first shot, he took me over there and explained all about how death works and how it was caused by being shot. I learned that day about keeping my finger off the trigger, safety on, and always no matter what keeping my muzzel in the right direction, just to be safe. I don't care who you are or what you have, seeing something die for the first time makes you pay attention.

you could always buy just the gun and not buy the ammo for it until he is a little older.

I married a woman that had a 3 year old son. He was diagnosed Hyperactive/ADHD at about age 8. Every time he left the house to play I got a call from a neighbor. Scotty liked to start fires. He started a fire in his desk at school and was expelled. I had a son with this woman and when my son was 3 Scotty led my son to a busy street a mile away left him. I can't tell you how much I hate Scotty. Scotty should be about 40 by now. He's been in and out of jail since he was 15.

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SOS USA

ADD and ADHD are sometimes caused or worsened by food allergies. You might do a little internet research and discuss it with the boy's doctor. I've been dealing with a child with gluten intolerance for 12 years (that we've known about it), and it's not always easy to say, "You really can't have that cake (or doughnut or whatever)", but it keeps her well.

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Insert short witty words here

Well..I'll tell ya' this...take things for what they are..not what everybody wants to think...

You may find that teachers and doctors and spare parents don't give a hoot about your kid's attention span. The average teacher will pass your kids behavior off to 'bad parenting'..the doctors will reccomend 'riddlin'..avoid riddlin if at all possible..better drugs exist that will help without creating a depressed zombie.

As far as video games...we just didn't have them in the house until the kid was older.

Guns..yes..just obey the rules..toy guns..sure..just obey the rules.

This is in regards to aa young man that turned 16 today...has been on about three meds for ADHD...just had a doctors appointment day before yesterday to get his perscription meds renewed...told the doc himself he needs the meds..and plays video games...We shoot all the time. and he's good..on the FFA sporting clays team..quite safe with guns....much different than in his younger days

It gets better as the kid gets older. It takes a set of functional parents..a good school system(not an indifferent one)..and a decent doctor..

Side note..riddlin sucks!!..better drugs are available..I will re-mention this because it seems to be the drug of choice..teachers like it..doctors like to prescribe it...unless it's working like a champ for the kid..I would seek an alternative.

What did parents do before ADHD ? I came from a family of 6 children.No drugs induced to children.We got spankings for bad behaviour,played every sport my parents could put us in, our time was filled up with physical excercise.Both of my kids would be classified as ADHD by todays standards.I walked my son and daughters butts of.Backpacking,running,swimming(daughter is a local record holder)soccer,gymnastics.Get them physically tired every day,housework for both sex's,yard work for both sex's.My Dad used to say "I have 6 kids,my house will always be clean" it was.Fill their time with physical activity.To many parents want a magic pill to replace real parenting.Both parents were on the same page with their kids
There is a direct correlation between kids put on ADHD medication and psychological problems as adults,the meds get in the way of growing up.I would never drug a kid,I would seek alternatives,there's plenty of good healthy activities.I was one of those kids that would have been drug induced if not for parents who found other methods to get my attention.Archery and a guitar were my outlets,guns came later when I could demonstrate some sense of responsibility.

I dont know much about it except I have the same situation but except for a couple visits a year dont live with it. My stepdaughter has a son with it. He is eight years old. His parents are liberals and wont allow him even toy guns. Justin is also huge. The doctors project he will be at least 6ft 8"s tall. He can drive me nuts in 10 minuets. God bless and help you!

Let me be clear, the meds out there work for ADD/ADHD, you need to work with a DR willing to go through them with you both as to type and dosage. You also need to be prepared to fight tooth and nail with your insurance company (if you are lucky enough to have Rx coverage) as the newest drugs out there are very expensive. I have two teenage boys, both with the ADD and one with the H. I can tell you within I min when the one with the "H" is off his meds. I love him as much as any father can, but he drives me nuts, without them.

I point this out because they both shoot and hunt very well, and as much as they can. I started them out young (first grandson's on both sides the grandpa's went crazy), and for several years did not shoot as much as I would have liked, as I was the range officer. Control of one's actions, safe operation of the rifle, and focus on the target where taught expected, and never compromised. Each kid had his own .22 (later advanced to shotgun, deer rifle, etc., now they love the AR) kept in the safe with the others. They only had access to them with my premission and only in my company, the granddad's or one uncle. Violations of the rules where met immediate "cease fire" dismissal from the range and loss of access, until I was of the opinion the kid was ready.

My oldest (the one with the "H") took to this like a fish to water, while we may have cut the day short one or two time's I do not remember the rifle being locked up for a extended period of time. The younger went for a good year without his rifle after a third or fourth violation. He was banned from the range, missed several hunts, and was told flat out by my wife's father he would not go to bat for him based on past actions. As you might expect grandpa really got his attention (did I mention he was a fine man). As they both advanced in skill, their access expanded, and one day my oldest asked to shoot clays while I was out of town. I took a leap of faith that the work had taken hold and agreed, if his mom would drive him (note I knew the fellas who ran the range and they knew the my son well), that turned into a standing Thursday night shoot, with my wife dropping both boys off and running errands by the end of the summer.

Today they are 16 and 13, shoot clays better then I do, both breaking in the 20's for trap and in the low to mid 40's for 50 clays on a regular basis. It has been years since either has had an issue with a gun of any type. Keep in mind they both struggle in school, but their grades are good enough to remain on their schools cross county team (the post about staying active was right on the mark), and the oldest has made some poor choices in the last year. Thankfully my wrath was much worse then that of the school, so in the end nothing too bad.

The major reason I tell this long tail is to encourage use of hunting fishing, shooting sports etc. as a form of instruction. Do not write a kid off from these great sports just because they are living with ADD/ADHD. I know the med's are a huge help, but giving them strict rules, proper instruction and the rewards earned by their hard work are every bit as important. Note the Photo is what they choose for last years christmas card..... Nuff Said

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always trust your cape...

Yes Sir, I hear you.

Thank you all for your sharing your thoughts.

Of course we don't wanna drug him. But he has to "function" at school, otherwise it won't help him at all. At home he has a filled schedule.

I was just curious if someone lives in the same situation.

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Jorge

It gets better as they get older.

We were late getting my son on some meds...and then the meds didn't work out...but the right meds..and the kid's off and running..grades are good..he's cheerful..helpful..obediant...vast improvement over the same kid at a younger age with no meds..and way better than the same kid on the wrong meds....

ADD/ADHD afflicts different kids different ways...most likely..my son has a rather mild case of ADD...some of his early on teachers didn't realize the issue...wife and I were in denial...other teachers guessed it right off the bat.

Despite what some think..you cannot beat the ADD/ADHD out of a kid..if you can..He ain't got ADD/ADHD..he's just a rotten kid....kids with the issues either slide through the system as under-achievers..or get help and come to grips with the situation...improves the school years..and helps produce a productive citizen...about as simple as that.

Just need a bigger board.

It has been my experience that when dealing with an "ADHD expert" there are no children, especially boys, without the condition. None. Unless he is seriously impaired ("Scotty"?) and severely autistic, I would call him normal. Too often, teacher's expect little boys to be as docile as little girls, so they can keep their butts in their chairs and conduct class like a pretend tea party with stuffed animals. It ain't that way! Little boys want action play and place no value on sitting quietly while some lady drones on about when you should wash your hands or cover your sneezes. Sorry "experts", men (like women) are not born at age 21. Like all of us, he needs to learn at his pace, have fun teaching him and sharing the time.

Both of my kids,myself,mother and sister have it.Try(and this is the really hard part) to treat without meds.the reason I say this is hard is most Dr's want to dope them and collect a check.How I know that, is another story.

Schedule,Bed time the same time every night,with only a few hours extra on weekend.Wake up at same time every day.Do as many things on a schedule as possible.

Minimize preservatives and dyes(esp. red #7 i believe)and chemicals in food.

Excercise lots of it,let them run wild,and as they get older,weights tread mill etc.


MOST IMPORTANTLY
Teach them how to shoot,yep you heard me correctly.If they enjoy it it gives you leverage to get good behavior(or works with mine) Not only is the discipline of proper firearm safety and use good for them,and we shoot in a very disciplined and deliberate manner.Proper sight picture breathing,and trigger control is a CALMING excercise,and requires discipline.It also counts as quality time.

My ex wife hates me cuz they try intimidation threats and rediculous idiotic punishments for minor stuff.Rediculous amounts of housework(so they dont have to get off their backsides).The only problem is high intelligence seems to go with ADHD,so when the kid figures out its wrong and why, you actually have all of the problems you only thought you had.Me I threaten to not let him shoot.

Hope this helps,I'm 41 and had a perscription for 35mg of adderol,I just cant stand amphetamines and the non amphets put me to sleep for 15 hours a day.I also tried to keep mine off meds.

PLEASE NO RITALIN IN ANY FORM.They designed a "new form of Ritalin" because the"old form" was doing too much damage and from my research 10 years ago this included permanant mental problems.The first Doc we went to was helping us try alternate methods of dealing with it and it helped a lot and went back to discuss more options with him as this was just the start.The origional Dr. had to retire due to health probs(he was in a wheelchair on the first visit and we were coming back to discuss more ideas and options etc.) The replacement kind of sneered an it and said since that didnt "fix" it he needed medication.He wrote it and I asked what it was ,he said "a new form of ritalin".I know several of the early Ritalin patients(experaments),they were worse than meth heads or crack heads .I got "rude"to put it lightly.

Agree 100% with Stevie. We have three sons with ADHD and have found that Ritilin (sp?) is not that great. Also, only one of them goes shooting with me, and I am right there behind him when he shoots. Good luck, B

As stated earlier, every situation is different.

For my wife and I, we purchased a trampoline and the Nintendo Wii Fit to increase physical activity and follow the Feingold Handbook for the diet. This has made dramatic improvement in our lives.

The Feingold diet eliminates all the food dyes, artificial flavorings, synthetic sweeteners, and salicylates that occurred naturally in fruits (apples, grapes and such). My daughter still eats apples and such, but the Fruit Loops and other brightly artificial colored foods are no longer part of her diet. Also, increase the amount of protein in her diet was a big plus.

My wife and I implemented a reward system. The key to the reward system is good behavior is to be rewarded consistently, rewarded frequently, and rewarded promptly. We used Popsicle sticks as pay and my daughter we cash the sticks in to purchase something she wanted to do. 30 minutes on the American Girl web page for 30 sticks is an example.

Your step son's father needs to follow the same rules you and your wife set. Consistency with the child is need.

Good Luck,

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Fair does not mean Equal

He's seven and back in Germany he was - besides other meds - on 25mg Adderol.

We have a schedule with almost everything. But since his dad took him off all meds he cannot function the right way.

Unfortunately you cannot beat ADHD out of them. Otherwise he would be "clean" within minutes

But teachers call very often and ask if we gave him his meds. Sure, they don't care. They wanna get some "robots" which do what they supposed to do without asking.

His attitudes give us a hard time, and they are not often good ones....

And I just don't wanna reward him with a rifle for misbehavior!

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Jorge

Back when I worked in a psychiatric hospital in 2003 we had a kids unit for those that were aged 4 (even that young) up until pre-teens. One of the biggest things to deal with were kids with the ADHD and ADD at that age. I noticed that the best things to do with them was to just keep them busy. I was like this growing up where I found myself bored in school and always had to be doing something. One thing I was always against was when the kids were put on Ritalin or some other drug at a young age like that, because their bodies are still developing. Ritalin changes a child and not always for the better. I shot my first gun when I was 11 years old, but really didn't get back into again until I was out of high school, but I always kept busy. I think that supervision is the best thing, but not just supervision, participation. Anyone can supervise a kid, but you need to do things with them, not just watch them do things. If a kid has something to do, and knows someone is going to be there to do it with them, it will give them a goal. My son is only two but he loves being busy, not just playing with toys but he wants us to do things with him. Even at his age he loves the outdoors, and he knows certain animals like deer, moose, turkeys and a few other birds plus trees. I know we are going to have to keep him busy. I like to look around locally at events that are free put on by the libraries and groups that we can take him to like the county fair. I remember as a kid myself that I was more interested in the stuff at the fairs and museums than going to an amusement park or an arcade.
As far as the BB gun, well as long as strict guidelines are set with it than it should be ok, but I would want to keep it with me and only go out with him. I would also recommend getting an identical one for yourself, that way you are shooting with him. Or take turns with the one. It can also be a tool that when things are good, you get so many shots with it, but that will depend on how he behaves (I know with ADHD that can be hard but it can help). Good luck with your step son.

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Vaya con Dios

I've only read one sentence from each of these posts so it's hard for me to respond but here's my take on it...

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Thirty characters. Exactly...

I understand you dont want to rewafd him with a rifle for bad behavior,and unlike a lot of people you are at least willing to put some work in it.Many people want to dope them up and leave them.Getting to that point takes work and age (and interest play a major factor).I'm just saying at some point,and it may not be now,shooting can be a healthy recreation for these kids.It may take a lot of work to get to that point but dont throw it out too soon.My oldest is 15,started shooting regular by 11.100 rounds of 223,and a box of .38 gives a LOT of laverage when necissary.I'm just saying not to throw the idea out. too soon.

Thank you all for your respond. It's good to know we are not alone out there.

Maybe it's a good thing if he start with the BB's at the age of 7. If he does good he might get a .22 later...

Thank ya'll

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Jorge

I would like to add just a bit-on a positive note.
We have known two boys who have ADHD-real problem kids-I went shooting with both-that was a challenge-Both are now in their 30s-one a paratrooper-SSgt-going to Warrant Officer school-the other, a SFC MP-both visit us-they have had multiple combat tours.
These guys had to overcome major difficulties. I would now trust them on my flank. Don't give up-do what you think is right.

I'm so thankful that I've not been put through trials like these. I'm 43, single with a girlfriend, and never had kids. I knew at a young age that I couldn't allow that much control over me. I'm mature enough to be kind and caring, but single enough to get out of the AO of that behavior FAST. My tolerance is low as my life is usually relaxed and quiet. HUGE kudos to the men out there that make the sacrifices to be a good family man. Sorry, It's just not in me. I prefer a black lab.......PS, My Sweety feels just the same as I do.

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Go big or stay home

As big a trial as it can be,it is one of the most rewarding things you can do.Not much better than watching a growing young man,shoot a .357 for the first time

However I greatly respect you for making an intelligent honest choice.I too love peaceful, quiet,relaxing environment.But I'd give it up in a minute so my kids could move in.

I was diagnosed with ADD at a young age, I started out with a Deutch Sportmodel even younger. Always supervise him and teach him the responsibilities. You would be surprised how therapeutic shooting is.

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Just the opinion of a kid

God Bless you and anyone else who has children with ADD/ADHD.
My son is a senior in high school and has a 3.72 grade average and is also an Eagle Scout. He runs cross country and works part time.
He has ADD but was never on medication.
Now that he is getting ready for college, he may have to try them. It has been an up hill battle for sure but he's never been a discipline problem. Just attention disorder problems.

Worse thing you can do is beat up the child physically or mentally over it. The child will already figure out at some point in school, that he or she is having a problem, but doesn't understand why. So they become bored, act out or start hanging out with other kids they can relate to, usually the trouble kids.
You have to explain the whole thing to them before they lose their self esteem and then get them help. If they need meds, then they need meds. Nothing shameful about that.
A lot of famous people have ADD/ADHD.