I see a lot of threads and posts about things people learned from fathers, grandfathers and uncles, but not many about things our mothers and grandmothers taught us.

My mother taught my brother and me the basics of cooking when we were very young, not because she believed we'd ever choose or be forced to do it as a regular thing, but because one day our wives would be in the hospital after presenting her with grandchildren and she didn't want us to starve. That, of course, was before hospitals required a new mom to ride a unicycle back from the delivery room.

For the same reason we learned to sew on a button and do laundry. It simply never occurred to her that we'd ever live alone without wives like her who would stay home and take care of us.

Good training, but for old-fashioned reasons.

I learned very young that I could be guilt-tripped within an inch of my little life. Took me until well into middle age to get a good handle on that one.

I learned that anger is wrong, evil and sinful and will send you to hell. And how to repress it and hold it inside.

I learned to read, at the age of four. I was ill for years with rheumatic fever and confined to bed for very long periods of time, so books and radio were my life. Books still are. Radio as I knew it is as dead as the stegosaurus.

My maternal grandmother was almost as influential as my grandfather in teaching me to fish, which has been therapy for me for almost seventy years. She also taught me the joys of baking bread and how to do really fine fried chicken.

From my mother I learned that sex was beautiful if you did it in the context of marriage, to manufacture grandchildren; but that if you really enjoyed it there was something wrong with you.

At fourteen, with no car and no job, marriage was impractical. But I figured if I was lusting for some cutie the least I could do was fall in love with her. I can't count the number of times I was in love in those years.

I learned that mothers really do have eyes in the backs of their heads, and that mine could hear my brother and me thinking about committing some minor outrage.

And so on.

Any thoughts?

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Oh well, what the hell.

Good thread. I called Mom yesterday to thank her for teaching me to try to step in to make brighter the day of those people I run across.

This got a big ol snort of laughter here.

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Now go make God proud...

My mom was very religious, outgoing and a hard worker. She could nag and be impatient. Mom was raised in a country general store. She only got as far as 8th grade and always worked in the store eventualy buying out her dad and running it untill the end of world war two. I was raised in it too.
One time she found a couple cigaretts in my shirt pocket. I was about eleven. She handeled it by getting down on her knees by the couch I was sitting on and praying to God for my errant misguided soul!
Mom was as fiesty as they get. Once when I was in high school I was in a fight with several boys. Who should come out of a store but ma! She waded right in and soon was chaseing one of my antagonists down the street! I never was so embarassed in my life! I would have rather took a beating by several of them! We did have some disagreements but always made up and remained close to death. I only have this one picture of her on my computer available and its when her and my dad got married. Sure do miss her! Mom always loved dealing with the public and ran vegatable stands, drove a truck and would set up on farmer market days in various towns until she was in her 70s. The local paper did a feature on her. Some called her "Apple mary".

Handsome couple. Your mom looks like a pistol...so to speak.

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Oh well, what the hell.

I learned most of my cooking myself and some from my Grandmother. Mom taught me when cooking not to burn or overcook anything, because she did it all the time on purpose for some reason, she liked burnt food, use to fry spaghetti only way she would eat it.

She did teach me to respect others and other peoples property, the hard way. How to sew and wash my own laundry. Oh yea and never to talk back to her, can't remember how many times I heard "Wait till your father gets home" she was a great woman, like the rest of my family may the RIP. Everything has come in handy through life, I still cook and wash all the time doesn't bother me, give the little lady a break.

I can't add anything to what you said, Mike; you said it so well.

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Lounge Lizard Extraordinaire

My Mother was a very small woman, 5 Ft. 1" & 108 Lbs. Fighting weight. But could raise hell with Dad & me. Kept us in line, so to speak. Taught me to cook & that came in handy many times. I was a batchelor until age 29 & helped my wife out several times feeding the kids. Am single again now & after helping Mom do the shopping i can grocery shop with the best of them. I'm BBQing a hamburger tonight with a tossed green salad & Black beans. Mom passed in 1999 at age 87.Might have a beer to wash it all down.

My mother was surprised that cooking became one of my main hobbies, and that I did 90% of the cooking through two marriages (the second and third) to good cooks.

She was more surprised that I had three marriages, finally getting it right the third time, but that's another story.

Another positive thing I got from her was a great love of music. She didn't like some of the kinds I grew to love--bluegrass and old mountain gospel, blues, and rock dismayed her--but she got me hooked on classical and big band stuff.

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Oh well, what the hell.

I learned a lot from my mother. She had the gift of teaching with a glance or a single syllable like, "Hmm!" or "Well!"

Here's her last photo, taken on her 91st birthday. That was pretty much her last smile, too, though you can see in her face the history of a lot of sensible instructions to her children. One of the smartest people I have ever known, but she never gave herself as much credit for insight as others did.



She was gone about six weeks after this photo was taken. That was four years ago.

This may be the first time I have posted a family photo here. I might not have if the subject hadn't come up and made me realize how much I miss her. Nice lady. A Texan, too -- the sly type, like her mother, and not brassy like some of her sisters. You all would have liked her.

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David Wilson

Teaching me the cooking basics was definitly the most valued thing in later life , I really like to eat. Second was how to make basic repairs with a needle and thread.

When a guy is young, away from home and not married you can do for yourself. I found I was a pretty good cook and enjoy doing it.

We refer to that "glance" as THE LOOK....when Mom gave you "the look" you knew you better stop or start doing whatever it was you were supposed to be doing or not doing.

Thank God for Mom's ...We Love You.

Gary

My Grandmother used to tell me "your hands are going to get you in trouble some day" which scared me to death and I thought was so deep and profound. As I got older, it began to dawn on me that just about everything you do involves your hands. If you rob someone, shoot someone, steal or write a bad check, you have to use your hands. About the only other thing that can get you in trouble is your mouth. Not so deep, huh?

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Dick

Manners, and an appreciation for family history, antiques and earning my own money.
Steve W

I learned from my mom that it's ok to sit on the couch and call the children in from another room to change the channel on the TV. ('60s)

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Memory of Randy Freas-Rimfired

I can tell that just looking at the picture. There's a world of character in that face.

She looked a lot younger than 91. Hell, she looked younger than I do, and I'm only 75.

Steve, thanks for reminding me about manners. They were certainly taught in our home.

I've been a widower living alone for seventeen years, and I still automatically put the seat down.

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Oh well, what the hell.

Mom gave me a moral compass and to have compassion for others .. and to protect the weak and helpless. She taught me to cook and sew for myself (this really helped out
before I married). Lost her 10 years ago and still think of her every day.

Love You Mom.

Don

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Laus Deo! <><

Good post Shoulda.
From both grandmothers who were super seamstresses, how to sew on foot tredal Singer sewing machines. I was pretty young and it probably was too cold to be outside. My Paternal grandmother made bridal gowns and bridesmaid dressed up into her 90's. She passed at 96. I learned what a dart was. I used this knowledge for black powder stuff, never let the other mountain men know.

My 2nd wife, the angel from heaven, sews and her mother is a super seamstress. My wife was making a girls top and I said is the dart big enough, she stopped and sat there staring at me. I said , WHAT! WHAT!!! She said I am just shocked that a man knows this. Oh well, my secret long hidden in a dark room behind some other old bones is out. Here is the skinny, if you can cook really, really good women get nervous when you are in the kitchen. When they find out you can sew they act like these were secrets only for women and react the same was as if Snowden just busted the NSA.

My mother was the best cook in the family and in our home town. I learned from watching her. Being the oldest of 3 I had to baby sit my lil Bro and sister. Made Cakes and pies from scratch. Mom would come home when I was in the "learning or OJT" mode, look the kitchen over ask in that mother speak that means this sounds like I'm asking you to clean up the mess but in reality it means you'd better clean it all up and do it right or I'll make your pre-puberty life hello. The only compliment ever would be an occasional this is good. Dad had no comment, he just ate. Dad never cooked once, ever.

Learned to can from Mom, gardening, parenting (this one really worked out well for me later) lots about life. She passed exactly 61 days after Dad, caught us all off guard. For a few years I'd have a question and think I'll call Mom to get the answer, then it would dawn on me that she was gone. Bummer, bad feelings. My sister did this too, but it was worse for her.

From my mother I learned the meaning of the words, respect, no and it's big brother NO!, never start a fight but do not let bullies win.

Dad went thru dementia and altziemers, I never got to tell him what he meant to all of us and what a good Dad he was. After he passed I told Mom what a great mother she was, how we loved her, how we saw and recognized her sacrifices, what an excellent grandmother she had been. You could have read newspapers at night blocks away from the way her face lit up. She said she didn't know anyone had noticed.

My Mom and Dad were like many parents, they learned on the first kid, me, and they eventually got it right ending up being great parents.

To my mother and to all your mothers, I love you and appreciate all you've done. You are and always be missed.

My mom taught me kindness, generosity and humility.

She also showed me that a green switch was far more effective than any belt ever could be!!

My mom was a cool lady. When I was in High School and working evenings and Saturdays my friends would sometimes come over to my house to play with my dog and visit with my parents.

Mom taught me many things; some by example and some via the good old fashioned lecture. Of all the things she taught me my favorite "lesson" is the value and importance of a great home cooked meal. The lady could cook I'm a tellin' ya!

She was also an old fashioned girl. She never had a "job" per se. She was the epitome of the good old fashioned American HOME MAKER. She taught me to respect my home and to not be too proud to grab a broom or a cleaning rag now and then.

She taught me how to be quiet and read the bible. I wasn't always quiet and I'm ashamed to say that I haven't picked up my bible lately but Mom spent some time with me on that and I still remember.....

Mom loved animals. I think I learned to love them by just watching her hold a kitten or a puppy. Although as I recall she didn't seem to like birds too much. I had a parakeet (or budgie as some people call them) named Pete and it squawked constantly and relentlessly. Mom didn't like no squawkin'....no sir.

She passed away in '94 at the age of 75. Don't see too many like her these days.....

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Real men love cats!

My Mama taught me that if you have children, everything you do should be for those children. She taught me that your family is the most precious thing you have. She taught me that "a good name is more to be desired than silver and gold." She taught me to be humble before God. She taught me about duty, especially to one's family and extended family. She is 94 now, and I am having the opportunity to repay some small part of the debt I owe her. I consider it a privilege to be able to take her for her appointments, treatments, etc.

She also taught me that it is a good thing to have a S&W with you wherever you go. On more than one occasion when she has called me on my cell phone and I told her that I was out in the middle of nowhere, or in a bad section of MaconGA, she has said, "you do have your pistol with you, don't you?"

I posted this earlier . . . . Mama "shooting some cans" with her friend Carson. Only an 87 year age differential there.

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Georgia On My Mind

My mom was a computer. Not an electronic machine, but a person that dose computations. In the late 40's and early 50's she could walk into any business with a accounting department show them her certifications and have at least a seasonal job. She often paid the Christmas and heating bill doing inventory accounting at department stores. Before I was born she did cost estimates on military aircraft contracts for Curtis-Wright (now under a runway at LAX) My brother has poor math skills and I showed no real interest, but her six grandkids are math whizzes. One granddaughter has a MBA, the other got a full ride scholarship in math. The youngest grandson has an accounting/ economics degree(s) the second grandson is work on an accounting degree (tested out of all required math for the first 2 years of collage, so he took engineering math courses for the fun of it. He went to a community collage on GI bill, his math tests were graded separately from the rest of the class because he destroyed the grading curve.) The other 2 grandsons don't work in math centric fields, but always blew the classes away with the math skills the inherited from their grandmother. Cooking isn't her strong suite, but my wife taught them to cook from scratch, so they won't starve. Ivan

I owe "everything" i am or ever will be to my Mother and Father.
Guess i was real lucky to be born to the parents i had/have,
Pops has been gone for 3 years now. Moms patience simply
amazes me and i am trying....really. She has always looked for
the good in people and i try to emulate that if nothing else.
One things for certain. They broke the mold when they made
my mother. God Bless her.

Chuck

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They hold no Quarter

1955

Last year

Mom taught her boys cooking, cleaning and sewing as she said you may not have a wife to do those things for you one day.
She got bored when all of us kids went to school and got a job as a teller at the local bank. Worked her way up to be vice president and managed the mortgage department back in the day when women didn't hold bank officer jobs.
She was the one all my friends went to for advice, financial and otherwise.
I miss her still everyday. She died at 65 having only collected one month social security after paying in all those years.

"Don't tell your father."

My mama taught me that if you call your brother a spazz, you get hit with a wooden spoon.

Mom taught me not to answer her call with a "What?" The correct response was "Yes mother I'm coming."

She taught me not to wear a hat, out of respect, in her house or anyone else's house.

She taught me the value of a dollar, when a dollar was almost worth one.

She taught me to recognize "the look" she would give us kids when we might have needed it.

She taught me failing school grades were unacceptable.

She taught me to work for what I wanted.

She taught me that if I never lie, I only had to remember the truthful version of what ever I did, or didn't do.

Now I must admit, I was far from the perfect child, I did forget the rules on occasion. When caught I was called to task in short order.

If Mom had known about everything I did as a youngster I would probably be a foot shorter than I am.

Mom has gone to her reward a few years ago now and I am poorer for the loss.

LTC

My grandma taught me how to sew, my mom taught me how to bake, she also gave me these 2 pieces of advice never drink alcohol and never use tobacco my birthfather who I have not seen in a long time is an alcohol and tobacco addict and she did not want me to become addicted to either of these things.

I was raised in the '50s by a single Mom after my dad deserted us. My Mother sacrificed a lot for my Sister and I. The best thing she taught me was hard work. She frequently told me: "Boy, you better be doing something, nobody owes you anything." I've done OK thanks to that advice.

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Keep Shootin' and check 6

Mom did teach me how to cook but then when the wife came along, she taught me how to cook the right way. Tolerated moms cooking, but love the wife's, my own isn't to bad.

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NRA Life member

I never met my mother but however she did teach me somethings...

1.Dont abuse the bottle
2. Dont do drugs
3. Dont be the driver of a get away car in a bank robbery


Those are the reasons me and my two brothers were taken away from her when i was 3 years old. When i was thought to be old enough i was told that she got into some gang in prison and was killed (sometimes i think i was just told that so we could maybe move on?). Anyways at least through her bad choices i have always as a boy and young man made sure that i was never anything like her and it made me2 be an ok guy i think. If she has passed away i hope she made things right with God. i have no hard feelings against her as i was not in her shoes when she made the choices she did, maybe she was trying to be a good mom and provide for us kids by taking a cut when they attempted to rob the bank,regardless like i said i wasnt in her shoes....so i just see her as a woman who made mistakes and have no harsh feelings towards her.

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Aim small miss small

It took a long time for the lesson to sink in, but the main thing my mother taught me was that it isn't my job to fix broken people.

No disrespect to my Father, who was tough as nails, a stern disciplinarian, and quick with a belt, but everything that I am, the very essence of my being, is a result of my Mother.

I tend to think the only fair judge on a person probley is the spouse or ex spouse. And maybe only they get relatively close. You can take two brothers or sisters raised by the same parents and you will probley get two different viewpoints. My dad had a close friend and I was his friend too. This guy would do anything for anyone. Kept old neighbors driveways plowed etc. He had a large family of kids, a few I went to school with. All his 4 sons were outlaws. How do you figure that? Two of them I hired and took them on the road with me. Big mistake! I started out working for a contractor. Boss asked me if I knew someone else that would work. I recommended one of his sons and brought him to work. He did okay but fell and got hurt. His dad I think was a millionair even back then. Owned several farms, ran a garage etc. We went to pick up the son and his dad, "Happy jack" got in the back of the truck and said I will work jillin for a week or two. I aint going to see him lose this job! The job paid minimum, was dirty hard diggin! Those boys all were in and out of jail forever. Haveing the best of parents certainly is a plus but it isnt always the answer. You know what they say about cops and preachers kids!

Wish mine had taught me that. I was raised to think that was my job, and built a career on it. I was well into that line of work and approaching middle age before I realized the profound truth of what your mother taught you. I continued in the profession, but didn't let it break me.

Blessings on that fine woman!

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Oh well, what the hell.

Include a love of books , reading,history,and a deep appreciation of Adages, Proverbs, & Old Sayings. They all seem to be true.

If by "that fine woman" you mean my mother, she was the damaged person I thought in childhood it was my job to fix. It took me a while to realize that she was beyond my ability to repair. It took me longer still to realize she didn't want to change, no matter how much she lamented her condition.

Always have macaroni's on Sunday.

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Just another brick in the wall

My mom could do time travel.

She always said if I didn't straighten up and fly right, she'd smack me into the middle of next week.

Sorry I misunderstood. There was some of that in my own case as well. Learning to be a caretaker was on-the-job training by the time I was six. But it sounds as if you had it a hell of a lot worse.

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Oh well, what the hell.