Ever Have a Seinfeld Moment?

Jack Flash

Jack Flash

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Background (Optional Reading):
While working as a contractor, I shared a cube with another contractor, a young woman, fresh out of college. I am, uh, a little older, and it seemed we did not have a lot in common.

We were cordial enough, but conversations were usually brief and a little awkward. That all changed one day. I was on the phone trying to get my boss to approve a few days off for me to take a mini-vacation with my wife. Things were hectic like they always are and besides everybody knows contractors don’t get vacation time, so the answer was a resounding NO. As I hung up the phone feeling a little dejected, I muttered in the Soup Nazi voice “No vacation for you!”

My cube-mate laughed and laughed. She told me how all her friends and family would quote Seinfeld, and everyone, young, old, in-between, always got the joke. It was like it had become its own language. It was neat how that really broke the ice.

The Seinfeld Moment:
(Reference: Jerry won’t eat the pizza)

I went to WalMart to get a prescription filled. On the way in, “nature called” so first I hit the men’s room. I had washed my hands and was standing at the mirror combing my hair. Just then, a toilet was flushed and a man exited the stall, walking past me and right out the door. The thing is, he had on a WalMart Pharmacy coat! HE DIDN’T WASH HIS HANDS!

When I went to the pharmacy counter, guess who was there waiting on people! I took one look and decided to come back another day, or find another pharmacy, just like Jerry would have done. Now I get the ‘script through mail order. I hope they wash their hands there!
 
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I work with a guy whose last name fits PERFECTLY with the business we are in.

Once I told him "You're like Mr. Bookman the library cop in Seinfeld!"
 
We were on a flight once, from Portland to Vegas. My wife was on the aisle, I was in the middle, and a gentleman with very little personality at the window. We were an hour into it, and my wife leans over and whispers, "How ya doin' with Vegetable Lasagna there?"

She might as well have put a Pez dispenser on my leg!

Among other things I'm fanatical about, Seinfeld is one of them. My friend Cory and I have a game, where if one of us quotes something, the other has to quote from the same episode.

Yes, I am a nerd.
 
RobertJ. said:
We were on a flight once, from Portland to Vegas. My wife was on the aisle, I was in the middle, and a gentleman with very little personality at the window. We were an hour into it, and my wife leans over and whispers, "How ya doin' with Vegetable Lasagna there?"

She might as well have put a Pez dispenser on my leg!

Among other things I'm fanatical about, Seinfeld is one of them. My friend Cory and I have a game, where if one of us quotes something, the other has to quote from the same episode.

Yes, I am a nerd.
Click to expand...

^^^^^^

*THAT* is hilarious!
 
Last Friday night, my sons and I saw Jerry Seinfeld perform live at the Meyerhoff Symphony Hall in Baltimore...he was just great!

Several years ago for my birthday, my lady gave me the Seinfeld box set: every episode, with special features, and a book that explains the genesis of each storyline. I watched every episode in order over about six months...laughed myself silly every day! :)
 
I don't think there's an episode where I didn't laugh myself silly, but three that regularly seem to come mind are:

"I can't spare a square"
"It rhymes with a female body part," e.g., Gipple, Mulva, Delores, etc.
"Shrinkage," an excuse Justin Bieber is currently using.
 
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Hard to read the post (?)
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My browser is set up using the old Forum style which is black on white. So I never know how it looks to others.

When I don't bother to log in, and just use the website default, I have found that various posts can be impossible to read. So I do as suggested above, just highlight the text.

You can change the defaults if you want to. It's easy. :)
 
I was eating out and like many people needed to use the bathroom. Well without getting too descriptive, I finished my business and noticed the toilet paper dispenser was empty.

It got rather awkward as I carry IWB and people kept coming in and out. Let's just say I spent about half an hour trying to work out how to wipe my *** and get out of there.
 
All the time.

A few years ago a friend an I were talking about something, I don't remember what, and he said tat he could build it (whatever IT was). So I look at him and say "levels Jerry, levels"!

In reference to Kramer wanting to build his apartment floor in various levels of height instead of having rooms. Of course he never does cause he procrastinates and Jerry knows he'll never do it.

Every time there is a get together with friends and someone starts a debate someone else always jumps in with "airing of grievances" and hoping that it wouldn't be followed by "feets of strength"

Also the ever popular "Helloooo theeereee"

Once or twice I had contemplated making a sandwich and bringing it to bed. -- For those who don't know or remember it's when George tried to have sex and have a sandwich at the same time but without being caught
 
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I always noted in the after-show credits, the name, Bernie Sanders.
NO No wait, I mean Larry David, had equal billing with Jerry.

No question about the originality of the Jerry Seinfeld thought process; but after I saw several episodes of that H B O show featuring Larry David, (?) I began to realize that half, if not more, of those great Seinfeld features came out of David's brain chambers.

I was at a graduation ceremony of a law school class the night of the final episode of Seinfeld.
The valedictorian speaker, the number one in his class, gave a great speech, humorous, lively, and some great points about law school and life. He now has a chamber of the law library named for him.

In closing he was looking skyward as though beseeching the heavens to assist he and his fellow grads in future endeavors.

(My paraphrase of the final few minutes of his speech.)
Very solemn, never missing a beat he said:
"Now as we new gladiators start our fight for right over wrong and move on;.... into those great hallowed halls of justice;

I know there is one ultimate thought that is running through the mind of each and every one of us,......is there someone,

somewhere,....... taping Seinfeld for us".

I like most there that night nearly fell out of my chair laughing, and the law professors were laughing loudest of all. Seinfeld seems to have had no boundaries in the variety of it's audience .
 
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It's hard to read on my iPad.
Which of course does not have a mouse attached, only a rat.
Funny how the guy out of sync wants everybody to align with him!
 
Dr.Lou said:
I don't think there's an episode where I didn't laugh myself silly, but three that regularly seem to come mind are:

"I can't spare a square"
"It rhymes with a female body part," e.g., Gipple, Mulva, Delores, etc.
"Shrinkage," an excuse Justin Bieber is currently using.
Click to expand...

One of my favorites:

"The Contest" episode.:D
 
Irn-Bru said:
I was eating out and like many people needed to use the bathroom. Well without getting too descriptive, I finished my business and noticed the toilet paper dispenser was empty.

It got rather awkward as I carry IWB and people kept coming in and out. Let's just say I spent about half an hour trying to work out how to wipe my *** and get out of there.
Click to expand...

Thats when you tear off your shirt tail :D
 
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