#5.
#1 reminds of when my Dad was rehabbing a house he bought and ran a nail into an artery in his arm. He went to the ER. Nurse looked at the arm, numerous bandaids, and a few blackened fingernails, and said, "Let me guess. You're a handyman."
Number 1 reminds me of when at fishing camp in Quebec I cut my little finger badly and my uncle and I patched me up with medicinal turpentine and cayenne pepper.
#2 hit the funny button today.
#3 they guy better hope he makes is appearance before the judge sees this picture. I would love to be in court if'n it happened.