For SD I would normally recommend a HP bullet (federal HST or Speer GD) however in the case of the .380, hollow points only seem to expand slightly and their penetration is way too little. So, in the case of 380acp, I would carry American Eagle 95 grain FMJ which from what I have seen has the highest velocity (of that grain weight bullet) and will penetrate adequately. IMHO penetration is key, expansion is a bonus. That is what I have recommended to friends that carry a 380.
Personally, even though I own a .380 I would never use it for SD purposes unless given no other choice. I carry a 9mm. Yes, the micro 9's are larger and heavier, but they fire a very effective round if the correct ammo is used. Personally I like the Federal HST 124 grain JHP.
I understand exactly why people are attracted to a 380 - size and weight, but the price to be paid is a less powerful round IMHO.
I have a Micro 9 and it gets carried when I want/need a smaller easier to conceal handgun. I also carry it in an ankle holster when flying as flight suit pockets don’t work for pocket holsters and a flight suit isn’t amenable to other forms of concealed carry.
I agree 100% with you about the need for proper bullet selection in a short barrel 9mm like the Micro 9.
And I find it ironic that you said that.
A few decades ago, there were virtually a no reliable 9mm hollow points. But 9mm hollow point technology has advanced and there are now a number of very effective 9mm hollow points, even in short barrel 9mm pistols.
The same thing has also happened with .380 ACP hollow points to a lesser extent, but you still have to give those effective hollow points credit for their ability to expand and penetrate at least 12” when the load and the barrel length are properly matched.