What's the rottenest

[G.T. Smith]

A buddy and I took his Dad's old artificial leg which was from the knee down and attached it to the inside of a closet door which was covered with a sheet. We attached a string up the wall and across the ceiling that could be pulled and make the leg swing out of the closet through the sheet. His cousins came down for the weekend and we all slept in the same bed room. We started telling scary stories about things that could be in that closet. The cousins were probably 5 or 6 years old and when we pulled the string and that leg swung out, they totally freaked out. We laughed but got in trouble with all the parents for scaring the boys so bad they wouldn't ever go back to that bed room. We thought we were pretty clever. Poor little guys though.
Peace,
Gordon

 

[NYlakesider]

Well I have done some rather interesting, possibly illegal but definitely nasty things when growing up. One was back in the 50s on Halloween night when I was about14. We had this neighbor girl that was extremely stuck up, nasty and just a general PITA to be with both in school (Catholic grade school BTY) or in general.

About 8 of us, both boys and girls were out celebrating Halloween in the normal for that time period of soaping store windows, throwing eggs that were left out side for a couple months and spraying shaving cream.

Miss snotty came out and started her normal she was superior and much better than anyone else. O maybe I should add she had long blond hair that could hang to about her waist.

A couple of the girls grabbed her and we pelted her with rotten eggs and plenty of shaving cream. Now here comes the bad part, we wound about 3 rolls of fly tape into and around her hair.

It was real bad as they could not get that sticky mess out and she had her hair cut to about ear level.

Sunday at church the priest really gave us the riot act about the fly tape incident a full fire and brimstone production and I could swear his eyes were boring a hole right through me. No cops ever got involved and in this girls credit she did not say who we were, as we were masked or who she thought we were. (I bet she knew as we all lived in the same area and went to the same school). Yes it was bad but somehow it made a change in her after a couple weeks and she stopped being so snotty and was actually not bad to be with.

 

[shouldazagged]

One of these days I may dislike someone enough to pull a gag I thought of years ago. So far I haven't.

It goes as follows: on any given day, say the 17th of the month, arrange for the victim to receive an anonymously sent, very small eggplant. No note, no return address.

On the 17th of the next month he receives a somewhat larger eggplant. And so on, till he gets a really enormous one.

Then stop sending them for two months, to lull him into a false sense of security. After which they start getting smaller...

The beauty is that the poor chump will be asking all his friends, "Are you sending me these damn eggplants?" And they'll all laugh and ask, "How did you figure it out?", so he still won't know.

Sometimes I think I'm a very sick man. But I do love the kind of gag that mystifies without harming anyone.

 

[carpriver]

I wish to make an apology to the entire Forum for my poor choice of words in my post of 8/18/13 @10:12 pm. I am sorry and did not mean to offend anyone or the moderators.

 

[P&R Fan]

Not really "rotten", but it was satisfying.
I went to a very strict Christian high school. The principal and I got to know each other quite well. I think he musta been lonely, cause he was always calling me into his office for talks.
When I graduated (barely), at the ceremony we all had our name read, walked up to him, he turned our tassle, shook our hand and handed us our diploma. I was one of the last ones in line. When it was my turn I shook his hand, looked him in the eye and said "your fly is open", turned and walked back.:eek.

He came to my open house. He had a big grin on his face and said "Jim, YOU GOT ME! I didn't know whether to laugh...or look". He had been standing in front of hundreds of people for an hour. What COULD he do?

I owed him that one.
Jim

 

[swampeast]

We used to zip tie the handles down on the wand at the town car wash and lay em on the floor and park across the road and watch people try to catch em when the deposited their money and the pump kicked on. I'm surprised I never broke out any windows because sometimes they would whip around pretty good!

 

[charlie sherrill]

This is one of many. I think the statute of limitations has run out though. While walking home from a movie one night with a couple of friends we walked by the parsonage of a small Baptist church. The area was well lit and the preacher was outside mowing his grass. One of my friends went to church there with his family and we stopped and talked to the preacher. While talking to the preacher we heard a large loud engine fire up at a chemical plant several blocks away. The preacher said that happened at the same time almost every night and that in a minute or two the owner of the souped up pickup would be coming by at a very high rate of speed. He said he had complained to the local police and they had come out several times but for whatever reason they never caught the guy.

He mentioned that he wished someone could make him slow down before he hurt someone. We continued on home and discussed the various ways we could slow down the truck. The next night just before 11:00 p.m. we went back to the church. We took two full galvanized garbage cans and place them on opposite sides of the road. We had a strong piece of rope we had blackened with shoe polish. We tied one end of the rope to one can and a heavy steel logging chain hook to the other. We heard the truck fire up and hid and waited. Just before the truck got there we slipped the hook over the handle of the other can. The truck hit the rope doing about 80 mph. A loaded can caved in each door and the truck screamed to a stop. We slipped off into the woods and left the area. We went back the next night to see if there had been any change. The owner of the truck drove by slowly with both doors missing from the truck.

Against my better judgment I went to that church with my friend the following Sunday. The preacher talked about the Lord moving in mysterious ways while staring a hole through us. Also, if you chain an axle to a fireplug it will usually take out both of them.

 

[shouldazagged]

It's just as well you and I didn't grow up around each other!

 

[Poodle Soup]

Im the dick who unscrews the parmesan cheese lids at the pizza places.

I even got my friend in trouble with his wife. After getting him with the prank a few times he decided to get me back. Little did he know part of my trick was to unscrew it BEFORE I used it. Holding the lid on with my finger I sprinkle cheese on and then pass it to the next person. Well his wife was watching me like a hawk as I accepted the cheese shaker from him, sprinkled it onto my pizza, and passed it to her with a smile. He almost upended the table grabbing for it... but to late. Entire jar of cheese covering her plate/lap.

 

[Badquaker]

I need to claim the fifth. I was a rotten person, and I have two ex wives that will claim that I still am. I try to make up for it when I can.

 

[wyccad915]

this one time in middle school I was in class and the tables were in groups of four (2 facing another 2). Well there was a gap in the center and this guy kept on trying to get me to look in the center to slam my face in. Well after a while he looks in the center so of course I slam his face in. Well we both end up in the principals office and I am assigned after school detention which I believe was an hour. I complained to my dad and he said he would call the principal and see if he could do anything about it. Well, I ended up with Saturday detention instead which was about 4 hours. Good ol dad.

 

[carpriver]

this one I have no regrets about. Our senior year in high school we attended a brand new modern one story high school. I was build in squares with a green space in the center of each square. Front square was where the offices and the cafeteria were,

Homecoming dance myself and 3 strong friends borrowed a new young teachers VW bug and rolled it into the green space during the dance. With a Allen wrench you can take the center post out of the double doors when they are open and just roll a small car right threw the door. It took a while for the janitor to figure how the prank was done. All the usual suspects where rounded up. they couldn't prove anything. well before the days of cameras monitoring the halls.

our prank made the little city and Detroit free press. It's the little things you do that make you proud.

 

[snubbyfan]

Hmm, should I post this? Oh well, here it goes.
Ok, true confession time. In High School I guess I was what could be called a bit of a bully. I had a bit of a reputation of being just a bit too brutal in a fight. People sometimes ended up in the emergency room.
Anyway, I'd shove peoples faces into their lockers, crank my lighter way up and run it across guys arm hairs and staple sleeves to arms. "What are you gonna do about it?" Really rotten stuff and I regret it.
I stopped that kind of behavior shortly after High School after deciding that just was no way to behave. I found that it's a lot more fun joking and laughing with friends instead of smashing peoples faces in.

 

[RonJ]

Whoah, someone finally rated one of my threads and gave it one star! I think it's a GOLD star.

 

[Straightshooter2]

The auditorium in one school I went to had the fold down seats made of wood but the frame holding the seat had a smooth pad under it that came down on a smooth flat stop. So basically you have two flat metal surfaces coming together. It's amazing how much noise is made (and how loud a girl will scream) if you put a full roll of caps on each side of a seat. I'm still wondering how, out of several hundred students, I got called to the principal's office on that one.

By the way, Caj or any other barristers here, what's the statute of limitations on putting a lit M-80 in a mailbox?

CW

 

[Frank46]

I was standing messenger watch when the top watch calle me over and hyland is sleeping down the thrustblock again. Said go doen there and wake his *** uo. OK walk up forward go down three decks lights are off and you can hear the snoring. I leave the lights off,close the scuttle hatch and dog it down tight. Then got the large wremch off an armored hatch an proceeded to beat the everlivin daylights on thedeck above him. The noises coming from the compartment were truly world class performance. Went back to the engine room and top watch asked just what I did. So I told him. Everyone in the engineroom crew darn nera split their pants when they got told and hearing the screaming and cursing coming over the phones. Being asleep is a court martial offence but the chief figgured he suffered enough. Never heard aword about it. Frank

 

[Poodle Soup]

Just recalled one today while at work.

My mother and I did not get along very well. She had an older curling iron with adjustable heat settings. Well the numbers were all worn off and every day I turned it down one notch. When I got it to the lowest notch (took 2 weeks or so) I left it for a few days. Then turned it up to the highest. She came home from work reeking of burnt hair.

Now that shes treating me decent I almost feel bad... but it still cracks me up every time I think about it.

 

[Smitty8612]

some buddies of mine in high school harassed another buddies old neighbor...the public sidewalk was "hers" and you weren't allowed to even ride your bike across it. So one summer day we were riding our bikes and roller skating across it all day...she decided to call the cops on us. Little did we know that just 40 minutes before that, we called and ordered 7 large pizza to her house. The pizza delivery and cops would pull in at the same time! Talk about bad timing!

 

[EQGuy]

Back when I was in the Army I got a hold of some cannon fuse. I took some paper and rolled it up tight so it was the size of a quarter stick of dynamite. I then put a very short fuse on it, lit it and tossed it in the shower when it was full. It was a lot of fun but I came real close to getting my rear end kicked that day.

 

[feralmerril]

I wasnt a kid but old enough to know better. Around 21 years old. I was working in louisiana treating power poles. The line went through some of the most miserable thick brush thicket I ever encountered. I caught up with my crew at a road. Will was sitting on his hauchs pulling out some stickers out of his arm and it was bleeding pretty good. We had a short conversation about who I should send back through that awful brush to get the truck and drive it around to where we were. It would be pure hell for whoever I sent back so I was considering on doing it myself but as foreman I had work ahead of me to do on the poles the guys had just dug around.
About that time neil a guy of 17 or 18 came walking back. He noticed will nurseing his arm and bleeding. His eyes got big and said "what happened to will?" The devil got in me and I said, "Will got snake bit! Run back and get the truck and try to find your way here!" Will helped with, "I`m a dieing!" Neil took off running, he hit the thicket, rebounded and tried again. we could track him by seeing the brush and tree tops shakeing. Presently I heard the truck come roaring up. Neil got out and it looked like he had fought a grizzly bear. His shirt and pants were ripped and he was bleeding in numerous areas! When he found he had been had he wanted to fight me. I was his boss and twice his size. That job could be fun sometimes! I did a bad thing but still find it funny.