Dead Crows

[pinduck]

Researchers for the Massachusetts Turnpike Authority found over 200 dead crows near greater Boston recently, and there was concern that they may have died from Avian Flu. A Bird Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was definitely NOT Avian Flu. The cause of death appeared to be vehicular impacts.
However, during the detailed analysis it was noted that varying colors of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analyzing these paint residues it was determined that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with trucks, while only 2% were killed by an impact with a car.

MTA then hired an Ornithological Behaviorist to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of truck kills versus car kills.

The Ornithological Behaviorist very quickly concluded the cause:
when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow in a nearby tree to warn of impending danger. They discovered that while all the lookout crows could shout "Cah", not a single one could shout "Truck."

Absolutely amazing!

 

[SmokeStack Lightning]

Wonder if they found one with Johnny Depp hanging out it's butt???

 

[woodsltc]

pinduck.........that was good....made me laugh-out-loud.


Don

 

[don5]

Now that was funny!! That's a good one pinduck! I laughed out loud at that one. Thanks I needed that!

 

[Mike McLellan]

I don't get it.

 

[sophie]

Ha, ha, ha, I wonder who paid for that analysis.

 

[Salty RI]

Ha, ha, ha, I wonder who paid for that analysis.

The Tax payer's who elso, I worked in Ma all my life and I believe that one.

 

[finesse_r]

Ha, ha, ha, I wonder who paid for that analysis.

No doubt funded by a federal research grant of five millions awarded to the nephew of some senator.

 

[shouldazagged]

I've said it before and I'll say it again: there's a special corner of hell for people who foist jokes like that on innocent readers.

See you there!

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to send that gag to some people.

 

[rojodiablo]

I actually hit a crow this year, back in June with my truck. Yeah, a dbl cab Dodge diesel. How on earth the fool decided the truck was not a problem, I will never know.
My son (23) was laughing about 'ole Cuervo getting smacked up in the grill, and then I told him this joke, but made it serious as could be.

He ate the hook- line and sinker.... and then looked right at me and said "I don't know who is dumber: The crow for getting hit, you for telling that corny arse joke..... or ME, for running with it. You made me so dumb dad...... Thanks."

I OWNED him for the rest of the day!!!

 

[Sebago Son]

Anyone who travels the Mass Pike just west of Boston knows that this couldn't be true... every time there's anything dead in the road the next FungWa bus to pass will slam on it's brakes and a herd of Chinese "chefs" will emerge to snap it up....

 

[charlie sherrill]

Crows are pretty smart, but they can't count. We used to spot a flock of them in a field. Three of us would walk toward the crows and they would fly away. We would leave one guy hidden nearby while the other two walked away. Soon thereafter the crows, who had been sitting in trees watching all of this, would go back to where they were interrupted after seeing two of us going away. The man left behind would then shoot as any crows as he could before they all flew away again. We never could get them to do this twice though.

Also, whenever you see a flock pull over under some trees and pop a "Fighting crows" tape in your truck stereo. Leave the doors open where they can hear it good and turn it all the way up. Hide nearby with your shotgun and get ready. They can't stand it. Being nosy they just have to come watch the "fight". I've got a friend who actually eats these flying rats. But, he's from Louisiana and there ain't much they won't eat. Just add hot sauce.

 

[CAJUNLAWYER]

You DO know you are going to hell for that one don't you.

 

[25elk]

I hate to be a party pooper here as when I was a young man we hunted crows and hawks as well. However, since a revision to the Federal Migratory Bird Act some years ago, crows are a regulated species and are subject to hunting restrictions per 50 CFR Parts 20 and 21. There is a maximum 124 day annual hunting season, which varies from state to state, and any additional harvest outside the state established season shall be for crop depravation only. Just a word to the wise. This is another federal crime to be used when it is expedient to do so.