Lazy gun

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(outside) Charleston, SC
My Gun



Today I swung my front door wide open and placed my Remington 870 right in the doorway. I gave it 6 shells, then left it alone and went about my business.

While I was gone, the mailman delivered my mail, the neighbor boy across the street mowed the yard, a girl walked her dog down the street, and quite a few cars stopped at the stop sign near the front of our house.

After about an hour, I checked on the gun. It was still sitting there, right where I had left it. It hadn't moved itself outside. It certainly hadn't killed anyone, even with the numerous opportunities it had been presented to do so.

In fact, it hadn't even loaded itself. Well you can imagine my surprise, with all the media hype about how dangerous guns are and how they kill people.

Either the media is wrong or I'm in possession of the laziest gun in the world.


Well, I'm off to check on my spoons. I hear they're making people fat.
 
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Amazing how those 870s are so well behaved.
Mine hasn't shot or threatened anybody either.
Neither have any of my other guns.
Hmmm...wonder what that means?

Stu
 
I don't take chances like you do, all my evil guns are kept under lock and key, a politician told me they're not to be trusted. Or......wait, maybe it was the politician who couldn't be trusted. I get kinda mixed up sometimes.
 
You know I've got a couple of loaded ones laying around the house, no little ones or idiots here, and neither one has ever shot anybody. Are they just too lazy to do it or maybe just well trained?:D
 
You think your shotgun is lazy? You should never meet my handguns. Every bleepin' one of them is actually too lazy to proliferate! I even store most of them in the dark, in case they're shy. I have stored them with their own kind, I have stored them with strange stuff, I have stored them with family, in case they envision themselves as Redneck guns. I have even stored them with twins.

I keep hearing about the proliferation of handguns, but I don't believe a word of it. Just another "urban myth."
 
It may be lack of attention and care. I take them for walks, constantly clean them, feed them well. I dote over mine and they have proliferated like rabbits. Can't seem to stop them!
 
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6 rounds? Must have one of those evil extended magazines. Why would anyone need something like that?

My 870's only hold 4 in the tube.
 
brotherinlaw looking for an evilist tool. i suggested the 870 tactical, even tho i don't own one. easy to purchase extended tubes, asseories. where he lives in NC there are no Acadamy's Sporting, Dunham's, that have been having a sale almost weekly on these shorguns. are their receivers steel steel?
 
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