Lying, Thieving, Cheating by Annuity Trustee

[Bekeart]

The thread about - The things you find out after someone dies ...
Brought the Lying, Thieving, Cheating by Annuity Trustee in my family to mind.

Lying, Thieving, Cheating by Annuity Trustee

1. What is an Annuity Trustee?
Fiduciary Responsibility: A trustee holds legal title to the annuity and manages it according to the trust document, acting in the best interests of the beneficiaries.

My dad had an annuity for his grandson.
The grandson's mother, my sister, was trustee.

After Dad died, Sister only gave her son half of the annuity and gave other the half to her daughter.
Sister claimed - "Mom said that both were to get equal amounts."

Bravo Sierra - Mom had told me that grandson was to get more,
because granddaughter had a husband with job and would have a good pension.
So grandson was to get more.

Regardless of what Mom said, or was said to have said, it should have no bearing on the annuity.

The annuity was taken out by Dad two years after Mom died.
Dad's intention should be obvious.

My sister stole over $9,000 from her son.

Bekeart

 

[biku324]

Can't 'like' that but I sympathize with your sentiment. Very sad.

The primary reason my late FIL (he was widowed in his 50s) never married any of the women he dated is he wanted his farm and assets to go to his kids, his way, after he passed.

 

[pharmer]

Nothing more poisonous than "dead people's money." I watched paltry amounts shred my blood family but now they are all dead. Hope it bought what they wanted.
Funny how people "re-imagine" fair when they can control outcomes. Joe

 

[Tom S.]

When mom passed away, we fought over her stuff. It went like this: "You take it." "No, you take it!" "No, you can have it." "Well then, you take this!" "Nah, I don't want it, you take it."
When dad passed away, the will sorted all that out. "You get this, you get that and he gets this."

 

[biku324]

We have a will for precisely that reason. If anyone gets mad about the split, they can be mad at the dead.

 

[ladder13]

No fights, no chicanery, no anger, on either my side or my wife’s side when settling either estate we inherited.
We have our own papers in order only so the state gets no or little cut, and our heirs get exactly as written.

 

[CH4]

Can relate

 

[IAM Rand]

Wills are sooooooo very important. My parents had wills. I was there when then got them redone. I was the executor for my father and my brother was for my mother. Should one pass before the other then everything went to the surviving spouse and then that son would be the executor for both. My mother died 1 week before my father.

Having all of this so fresh in our minds, my wife and I used the same attorney. We have had a falling out with my older son so my younger is the executor. Not being total jerks, we have allotted a little money for the older son. We also put in a proviso in the will that if he challenges the will he will get nothing. This may seem cruel but I still hold out hope that one day we will be able to rebuild the bridge and become a family again.

My MIL passed about 3 months after my parents. She had no will. My wife has a sister that she is not very close to. We went to the same attorney to help us with her estate. My wife and I were fortunate with my parents so we let my SIL be the executor and have everything my MIL left behind. We did make one request to forgo any challenges to the estate. We wanted my wife's niece's ex-husband to get some money. My MIL really liked him even after the divorce. SIL agreed to the terms. Months later she had still not given any money to the niece's ex. We very politely reminded my SIL of the agreement and low and behold, she coughed up the money.

Those people without wills are leaving their wishes to the wind on which they are spoken and whims of the people they are leaving behind.

 

[Rudi]

The want of money brings out the worst in people for sure.

 

[old bear]

Remember that blood is thicker than water, sadly it's not thicker than greed. My will has a no contest clause, ya don't like what I've decided deal with it. Contest and you loose.

 

[LVSteve]

The joys of being an only child.

 

[Mike LaNier]

Wills are VERY important, but I would also advise a Revokable Trust if you have any assets at all, and particularly if you have blended families. My wife of 30 years and I both have children from previous marriages, and they will in all probability inherit from their respective 'other' parents as well, so the trustees (us until we pass, and then her daughter and my daughter (from previous marriages) will be the trustees of our estate... not only to balance things out, but to insure our wishes are followed. Family heirlooms are rare, as we lost our house and everything in it due to a wildfire 5 years ago, but we do have some assets which will be divided evenly (we hope!). We are in the process of giving what few heirlooms we have to individual children before we expire. Just a thought.

 

[ladder13]

Trusts,POA, and healthcare proxies are part of the “package”.

 

[Sarge9]

I remember a bro and sis, "I get the car, you get the camper, ect."
The next week, she said " nothing to be had, Mom had 2-3 loans on all "
I loved it.

 

[Autonomous]

I struggled for years on how much to give to an estranged daughter.
Like many here I started with nothing and busted my butt to have a comfortable retirement.
I didn't work hard and deny instant gratification just so she could blow it all overnight.
She and each of her 3 kids get 5% each. My other daughter and step daughter will split the rest.
She will think it is unfair as her siblings have master's degrees and she is living in squalor.
Blood only goes so far.

 

[biku324]

There's difference between generosity and 'enabling.' You've hit a good balance, IMO.

 

[Golddollar]

Wills are sooooooo very important. The spoke word is only as good for as long as it hangs in the air and as the people that hear it.

But wills shouldn't be considered as being set in concrete during the life of the maker. Beneficiaries can die or become incompetent, quality of the relationships with the beneficiaries can change, your assets can change. Take a good look at your will at least once a year. If only a few changes need to be made, you might be able to just execute a Codicil (essentially an amendment) to your existing will rather than rewrite the whole thing.

 

[olfart]

When my dad died 53 years ago, my half-sister got upset. She said "I know where that leaves ME! You'll get everything, and I'll get NOTHING!"
I told her, "No, Mother gets everything. You and I both get nothing until she passes."
In the meantime, our mother gave my sister's husband the 24' pontoon boat that she couldn't handle by herself, and I got the bill for the lawyer who handled Dad's probate.

 

[Walkin Horse]

Blood is thicker than water, until they read the will. Fortunately for my daughter, I started out with nothing, and I haven’t lost a thing.

 

[CAJUNLAWYER]

Down here estate planning a lot of times means that the first family is cleaning out the trailer while the second current family is attending the funeral. Makes for some fun times and usually allows at least two lawyers to make some fees