On naming children - are parents insane?

[Gatofeo]

I was a newspaper reporter for 12 years, from 1985 to 1997. Much of my job involved taking down names, especially of children when you took photos or quotes.
In my Journalism 101 college days, we were told never to assume anything, especially the spelling of names. Boy, is that right!
Why do parents insist on giving their children weird or incorrectly spelled names?
Don't they realize that the child will spend the next 80 years or so explaining its spelling or pronunciation to every clerk, reporter, teacher, new employee, boss, etc.?
One of the worst butt-chewings I got was as a young reporter in 1985, in Wyoming, when I put in a boy's name as "Tom."
His grandmother called me, livid, and screamed, "You people never get it right! Are you idiots?"
And how was the boy named?
Not T-O-M or even T-H-O-M but T-A-W-M!
Now, I had to be diplomatic and apologize to the seething grandmother when I really wanted to shout back, "Well, who's the chowderhead who spelled his name so badly?!"
Friends of mine have a boy named Konner, instead of the more common Connor. I've seen Codee and Codei in place of Cody, Elizubeth in place of Elizabeth, Jereme in place of Jeremy and so on.
Parents defend it by saying they want their child to be a little different.
My response is, "You want your child to be different? Then teach him or her to address strangers as 'Sir' or 'Ma'am" instead of 'Dude.' Teach them to hold open the door for the person behind them, especially if that person is elderly. Teach them to respect authority, instead of plotting to subvert it at every level. Teach them that winning at any cost is losing your dignity. Teach them that they don't 'deserve" a thing, but should work for it. In today's world, that will make them different!"
Yes, I understand that some families have long-established names going back generations. I know one family with at least one boy in each generation with the middle name of G'sell, because a general named G'sell saved an ancestor's life in battle.
It's a wonderful story, and I understand why G'sell is honored with this practice.
There are also ancestral variants on names, such as differences in the spelling of Carl and Karl based on former homelands.
I can understand that.
But most odd names have no such precedent; they're given by the whim of parents who think it's cute, humorous or attention-getting.
In Seattle, I knew an old woman with the name of Virgin Mary Christian. How she must have suffered, especially as a girl, with the first name of Virgin. It's criminal.
I knew a family named Butz who named their baby boy, Harry! Not Harold, but Harry! He's lived with the name Harry Butz for nearly 40 years.
And God knows who many hippies named their children Starshine, Wintersun, Peace, Liberty, NoWar and so on.
Frankly, sentencing a child to explaining his name or its spelling for his lifetime is, to my mind, bordering child abuse.
For the record, my name is common and commonly spelled. So is my brother's. Thankfully, my parents had the common sense to give us regular names, with correct spelling.

Signed,
Aloysius Perseus Orion Einstein Patton, Sherlock Bucephalus Jesus Bhudda Troutslayer Mohammed Gatofeo III, esquire

 

[Gatofeo]

I was a newspaper reporter for 12 years, from 1985 to 1997. Much of my job involved taking down names, especially of children when you took photos or quotes.
In my Journalism 101 college days, we were told never to assume anything, especially the spelling of names. Boy, is that right!
Why do parents insist on giving their children weird or incorrectly spelled names?
Don't they realize that the child will spend the next 80 years or so explaining its spelling or pronunciation to every clerk, reporter, teacher, new employee, boss, etc.?
One of the worst butt-chewings I got was as a young reporter in 1985, in Wyoming, when I put in a boy's name as "Tom."
His grandmother called me, livid, and screamed, "You people never get it right! Are you idiots?"
And how was the boy named?
Not T-O-M or even T-H-O-M but T-A-W-M!
Now, I had to be diplomatic and apologize to the seething grandmother when I really wanted to shout back, "Well, who's the chowderhead who spelled his name so badly?!"
Friends of mine have a boy named Konner, instead of the more common Connor. I've seen Codee and Codei in place of Cody, Elizubeth in place of Elizabeth, Jereme in place of Jeremy and so on.
Parents defend it by saying they want their child to be a little different.
My response is, "You want your child to be different? Then teach him or her to address strangers as 'Sir' or 'Ma'am" instead of 'Dude.' Teach them to hold open the door for the person behind them, especially if that person is elderly. Teach them to respect authority, instead of plotting to subvert it at every level. Teach them that winning at any cost is losing your dignity. Teach them that they don't 'deserve" a thing, but should work for it. In today's world, that will make them different!"
Yes, I understand that some families have long-established names going back generations. I know one family with at least one boy in each generation with the middle name of G'sell, because a general named G'sell saved an ancestor's life in battle.
It's a wonderful story, and I understand why G'sell is honored with this practice.
There are also ancestral variants on names, such as differences in the spelling of Carl and Karl based on former homelands.
I can understand that.
But most odd names have no such precedent; they're given by the whim of parents who think it's cute, humorous or attention-getting.
In Seattle, I knew an old woman with the name of Virgin Mary Christian. How she must have suffered, especially as a girl, with the first name of Virgin. It's criminal.
I knew a family named Butz who named their baby boy, Harry! Not Harold, but Harry! He's lived with the name Harry Butz for nearly 40 years.
And God knows who many hippies named their children Starshine, Wintersun, Peace, Liberty, NoWar and so on.
Frankly, sentencing a child to explaining his name or its spelling for his lifetime is, to my mind, bordering child abuse.
For the record, my name is common and commonly spelled. So is my brother's. Thankfully, my parents had the common sense to give us regular names, with correct spelling.

Signed,
Aloysius Perseus Orion Einstein Patton, Sherlock Bucephalus Jesus Bhudda Troutslayer Mohammed Gatofeo III, esquire

 

[Wheelgunner840]

The absolutely most ridiculous name I have ever seen was posted here not too long ago. The girl would come home from school very upset that the teachers and staff were not pronouncing her name correcty. The girls name was spelt Le-a. They kept calling her Lea (pronounced Lee-a or Lay-a. Her mom called the school irate and told the school authorities, and I quote,"Her name is LEDASHA! The dash don't be silent!"

I kid you not.

WG840

 

[walkinghorse]

My sister who is a retired special education teacher from Louisiana often had to testify in court about the treatment of special needs kids, their enviroment at home, and the parent (usually only one, but lots of transient boyfriends, pimps etc.

) She testified in one case where the mother was suing the board of education because her daughter had not learned how to spell her name.

My sister testified that she could not spell the girls name either

. She also testified that a 6 year old child could not be expected to spell a name that had 27 letters in it, and the letters came in no logical sequence!

Seems the mother was only looking for a monetary settlement, and she had other kids with the same naming problem, so everyone was expecting this claim against the school board to repeat itself.

BTW, in testimony the mother could not spell the childs name the same way as on the birth certificate either. Her lawyer could not prep her well enough!

 

[conn ak]

Originally posted by Wheelgunner840:
The absolutely most ridiculous name I have ever seen was posted here not too long ago. The girl would come home from school very upset that the teachers and staff were not pronouncing her name correcty. The girls name was spelt Le-a. They kept calling her Lea (pronounced Lee-a or Lay-a. Her mom called the school irate and told the school authorities, and I quote,"Her name is LEDASHA! The dash don't be silent!"

I kid you not.

WG840

Plexico Burris is pleased. So are is nephews, Tylenol and Datril.

 

[Dusty Miller]

For the record, once you become an adult you can legally change your name. As a matter of fact, lately I've been mulling over "Horace Hogsnort", among others!!

 

[Gatofeo]

Hmmmm .... Horace Hogsnort ... not so loud! Some parent will name a whole litter of Hogsnorts: Horace, Hortense, Harry, Harriet, Hector and so on ...
Gawd ... I think my post has created a slew of monsters ...

 

[Wyatt Earp]

I see this all the time and just have to laugh at people's stupidity.

I write the name as the normal spelling should be. If it's wrong, it's their problem.

My daughter is Natalie. Not Natalee, Nataylie, Nataleah, or any other stupid variation.

Yes, I called it stupidity becuase I call a spade a spade.

 

[okie john]

My mother lives in Louisiana and has a keen eye for names. Her favorite, and mine as well, is Bacardi Latravius.

Saw it in the paper.


Okie John

 

[Gatofeo]

One of these days I'll run across a kid named, "Jose Cuervo Viagra" and think ... "Well, that explains his night of conception ... "

 

[R-Tex]

I have a copy of a book by investment/financial author John Train which is entitled Most Remarkable Names. All the names included in the book are documented as real, no-foolin' names of real people.

My favorite is "Loyal Lodge No. 296 Knights of Pythias Ponca City Oklahoma Smith". No kidding -it's on page 82!

 

[guntownuncle]

In Seguin they have a kid named Abcd. It is pronounced Ab-suh-dee. I guess its better than being the 12th Haley, Kaley or Ashley in her grade. Or should I say Haileigh, Kaylee, or Ash'leigh. My theory is that parents (or parent) give their kids weird names as a way of being distinguished since their actions will never do it. It is similar to the need to have your last name written across the back window of your car. "My family's only accomplishment is that we're on our 4th generation without a non-bastard, but look I got my name on the back of my Impala in Old English writing."

In my humble opinion, people should stick with family names. Both of my girls are named after their ancestors, my grandmother and great-great grandmother. And the funny thing is, since they have normal names, take Julia for example, they are the only ones in the entire school district with those names.

 

[litauer]

Late 90s, the Chicago Tribune had a photograph of a woman leading some sort of march on the South Side. Her first name was Bordella.

 

[mjr]

Somewhere in this part of North Carolina there's a little girl whose mother named her "Dontruster." That's a kid who's in for a great childhood.

 

[truckemup97]

Somewhat in defense of the parents:

My daughter's name is Maegan. It is derived from my wife's mother's middle name, Mae, and my mother's name, Margaret, of which Megan is the Celtic form. So we spelled it a little differently. Having Googled the name, I know that many other parents have spelled it this way, too. Other common spellings are Meagan, Mehgan, Meaghan, etc. Which is correct? Well, in the case of my daughter, Maegan is correct.

 

[Mickey D]

My parents names us four boys...Mark, Mike, Steven & Scott. All with normal middle names too.
The african-american population are known for making up some really odd names, such as Lakrisha, Jabrol, Sheenekwa, or Sha-nae-nae.

 

[loubob608]

One night about 9 years ago, my partner stopped this local guy and his girlfriend on a traffic stop. The guy had warrants and knew it. He also had a bag of weed. He gives the bag to his pregnant girlfriend and she shoves it under her very large pregnant belly and into the front of her pants. My partner saw this and she eventially turned over the baggie. About seven years later I'm at an awards ceremony for my 2nd grade son. The principal is calling out the kids' names as they receive their awards. The principal calls out the name Sinsemilla Jones and this little girl walks up to get her award. I look around the room and see the proud pothead parents from the night of the traffic stop clapping and taking pictures. (the last name has been changed to protect the guilty)

 

[CAJUNLAWYER]

I live in Louisiana and had a client with the first name of "Heroin" I kid you not!!! He is presently in jail doing hard tome for narcotics distribution.

 

[dlstewart01]

Kids name was pronounced La-mon-ja-lo.
The mother was asked how she arrived at that name, She said she looked in the cabinet and saw it on a box. The spelling of the name: Lemonjello.

 

[BDavis]

Originally posted by dlstewart01:
Kids name was pronounced La-mon-ja-lo.
The mother was asked how she arrived at that name, She said she looked in the cabinet and saw it on a box. The spelling of the name: Lemonjello.

I think his little brother's name is O-ron-ja-lo........B.