Stopped by Police at 2 a.m.

[Juliet_Bravo]

Just received this in my email and thought I'd share the laugh...

An elderly man was stopped by the police around 2 a.m. and was asked where he was going at that time of night.

The man replied, "I'm on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking, and staying out late."

The officer then asked, "Really? Who's giving that lecture at this time of night?"

The man replied, "That would be my wife."

 

[george minze]

Now that is funny I don't care who you are.....I hope I'm in that position when I'm that old...I'm getting there quick !!! The only thing better would be, well officer I'm coming back from the Mustang Ranch they had a two for one special....At that age, THAT would be something to brag about.....

 

[fat tom]

Well,you ain't got to be elderly to attend THAT lecture.
f.t.

 

[VAPA]

I don't have to wait till 2AM to get that lecture in my house.

 

[HalfStack]

Ahahaha, good one!

 

[shouldazagged]

Well,you ain't got to be elderly to attend THAT lecture.
f.t.

In fact, if you qualify for it often enough, you may not get to be elderly.

Two young guys are sitting in a bar when they see a wrinkled, decrepit geezer surrounded by gorgeous young women, slugging down shots and having a wonderful time. When he grins they see he has amazing, perfect white teeth.

"Nice false teeth on that old guy," says one.

"Hell no, those are his own teeth!", says the other.

So they make a little bet, approach the relic, and ask him. "Nope," he says, "they're all mine."

"That's really amazing," says one of the young guys. "How have you kept them so perfect?"

"Well," the geezer says, "I drink two quarts of bourbon a day, smoke twenty cigars daily, eat nothing but spicy Mexican food, and chase women till four every morning."

"Incredible!", says the other young man. "Do you mind telling us your age?"

"Not at all," he answers. "If I live till Tuesday I'll be twenty-six."