Whipping or Child Abuse!

[sheriffoconee]

yes, he did author his own misfortune ( I like that term ... consider it stolen)
the so what part of 8 years .... just how much did that vid get her over the years ..... as much as we want to measure this against our own ideals and select saints and sinners from this, I whole heartily believe there are no saints to be found in this dysfunctional brood.

I didn't mean to suggest there were any saints here, I am just suggesting that whatever SHE did, if he had any control over his ability to control his temper and discipline his daughter without using that language, then I suggest he deserves the attention he gets, one day after the event, or 8 years later

Oh, by the way, I stole that line from an Assistant DA I worked with years ago when I was an investigator in the DA's Office, feel free to use it at will

 

[Evil One]

My only issue with it is the fact that he was being pulled along by his temper.
Son, daughter, mother, father... makes no difference.
It was a child being spanked by their parent.
My father spanked me. Bare hand, belt, paddle.
He did it while angry once. I honestly think it was worse on him afterwards than me. And I smarted from it for a while.
My childrens mother and I have been split up for a number of years.
I was the disciplinarian, she was the one who took away privileges.
They are in their mid/late teens now... and are good kids, but still somewhat rowdy teens.
I have not touched them in years, have not needed to.
I still get calls to talk to them and straighten them out.
They are my kids and still get my input on their lives.
I can be at their mothers house, where they live, and they can start to get out of hand.
Loud, rambunctious, etc.
Their mother will start in on them to settle down and straighten out... and it can be like she is not there or is talking to a wall.
All I have to do is clear my throat, say "HEY", or catch their attention and give them a look... and it calms right down.

All I know of the situation that the thread is about, is what is shown.
However most of the belt strikes were down right ineffectual.
Bed slowing the strike, belt hitting too close to the grip, etc.
There was not much pain dealt out.
Then again, I never saw corporal punishment to be about the pain... Only about a physical and emotional response to rules broken.
The sound of the blows were generally more effective than pain passed thru them, and the knowledge that they have pushed things to get a physical response.

There will always be disagreement on corporal punishment.
The effectiveness of any punishment depends on both the child and parent.
On some it will work, and on some it wont.
When I was a kid, it was direct consequences to my actions... not pain infliction.
I was a hard headed and stubborn kid.
I stopped doing things because I didnt want to be whipped, I listened to my father... because he had my 100% attention at that point... and learned the "whys".
Everyone is different.
Some kids never need to be touched.
Some learn from corporal punishment.
Some wont learn, no matter what.

It is a case by case basis.
I wont tell people they should or shouldnt spank their kids.
Then again, I have had people tell be that ANY discipline of ANY kind emotionally scars kids.

People will never agree on raising children.


Jim

 

[oldman45]

It is obviously a difference between whipping and abuse. I agree a person can go too far with a whipping. My father loved to whip me when I did something wrong. I often got whippings for things my sisters did simply because he would not whip the girls (they were older than I).

My father also gave me about anything I wanted. I was driving new convertibles each year I was in school and taking friends on trips when we could.

There was also some reasoning for the way my father treated me. He was one of 14 children and the next to the youngest. His parents both passed away before he was six yrs old. The kids were more or less put in neighboring homes as farm laborers. In short, he never knew a natural home life.

Yet when he whipped me, I knew why he was doing it and I generally deserved it. I learned from each whipping and it made me a better person.

Once I was picking on a younger, much smaller kid after school. My father was driving past and saw what I was doing. He pulled his car off the road and snatched me up by my arm. In one swift motion, he pulled his belt and begin to whip me. As usual, I was trying to pull away. I would take a step and he would hit me with his belt. This went on all the way home. I would step and he would hit. We walked about two miles home. Once home, he had my mother take him back to get his car. When he was back, I got another whipping. I never again picked on anyone. Was it abuse? Yes, but I learned a lesson.

Back then (in the 50's) my mother never said that she would whip me when we got home. She did it then inside stores. People would hold her packages while she whipped me. Now people would call the police. Likewise, now we have more troubled youths.

Both my parents said that kids were like canoes and went forward best when paddled from behind.

So what was the outcome of all these whippings? I never went to jail. I never made bad grades in school. I obeyed the laws of the house and society. I grew up appreciating my parents for what they did for me and while I did not like the whippings I got, they did serve their purpose even though sometimes it was abuse or borderline abuse.

My parents were not perfect people but they were not bad people. I grew up wearing suits to church, hospital and funeral home visits. The family ate meals together at the table, we went to visit friends and I was taught manners. Few children today have manners or respect for others. Sure there are some that do but not the majority. Many I see daily in my work do not even respect themselves, let alone others.

I feel we were better off years ago when parenting was left to the parents and not the schools, law enforcement or the courts.

 

[6mmman]

Amen to that oldman45. I too got my share of punishment growing up. I deserved it and am a better person for it. I don't like what the judge did because I think he lost it. Teenagers can do that to you. Been there! I think the 24 year old is a scumbag, plain and simple. She should be supporting herself instead of trying to extort more support from her family. Just another case of a spoiled wealthy brat trying to get her way about everything in life. Sad part is the parents did it to her and she can't rise above it because se is angry at her parents for all they have "given" her instead just loving her which is what a child really needs.

Just my rant for the day

 

[oldman45]

Amen to that oldman45. I too got my share of punishment growing up. I deserved it and am a better person for it. I don't like what the judge did because I think he lost it. Teenagers can do that to you. Been there! I think the 24 year old is a scumbag, plain and simple. She should be supporting herself instead of trying to extort more support from her family. Just another case of a spoiled wealthy brat trying to get her way about everything in life. Sad part is the parents did it to her and she can't rise above it because se is angry at her parents for all they have "given" her instead just loving her which is what a child really needs.

Just my rant for the day

The only thing I could add to your post is that everyone thinks their kids can do no wrong. A problem with this attitude is parents overlook some of what they see at home and they do not know what goes on when the kid is away from home. By the time they find out what their kids are like, it is often too late to correct the problem.

 

[Gun-runner]

The guy is a moron!! My parents whooped me but never for anything as stupid as this!!!

 

[GearHead_1]

I'm speechless, seriously, I don't know what to say. I actually believe that a well time swat on the butt with your hand may help when it comes to discipline. So it's not that I don't expect kids to tow the line.

I am not a man that is prone to violence but I now all too well how that form of abuse feels first hand. That said, should I have been present when this happened, this guy would have never gotten the second lash in. Nor would he have left the room without having to pick himself up from the floor. He at that point would have known for a fact if he had chosen the right belt. Way too far overboard.