Are you sure this guy isn't a politician?
Craigslist roomate ad-hysterical
- Thread starter CAJUNLAWYER
- Start date
Malpasowildlifer
Member
Craigslist is scary
bluegrassarms
Member
got more than one gun in your underwear?
At least he didn't shoot an elephant in his pajamas.
I'd much rather room with Sheldon Cooper than this guy. We like all the same TV shows and Sheldon has a Lego Death Star.
Well , at least he didn't say anything about NO GUNS !
I'm sure there is an entire sub-clause in the roommate agreement that goes something like this:
Section 47b: Firearms: I realize the world is a big scary place full of some not so desirable elements (Now in using the word "Elements" I am talking about people, not the basic building blocks of the universe from the periodic table of elements. Also, I am specifically NOT referring to the vaguely cubist product of Honda of America form 2003 through 2011, the Honda Element)
whom are somewhat engendered toward behaviors that we more refined members of the community deem to be unacceptable. (Examples of such behavior can be found in section 458c of this agreement: Nefarious and felonious acts and their consequences.) Stopping such elements from performing their nefarious intent may require the possession and possible use of a firearm. By firearm, I am specifically referring to the modern definition of "firearm" and excluding weapons loaded with a separate charge of powder, ball and ignition source. Said modern firearm must not be glossy, as the gloss would distract me in a time of duress. The firearm should also be of a dark color, or lacking color some form of basic black. This therefore rules out stainless steel in its bare form. Caliber must be an even number. I want nothing to do with odd number calibers. As a matter of fact I want the caliber to be larger than .30 and less than .50 ............................................zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
That can't be for real. There's no way that guy would get a serious response from anyone from the real world. Sharing a cell at a high security prison with lifer sounds more appealing than rooming with that guy.
Sounded PERFECT to me
B U T
You allow MEAT to be cooked IN THE HOUSE?
Are you serious?
Meat cooking smells aggravate MY allergies and ONLY deli meat should be allowed in the house!
Further more - ONLY slippers should be allowed in the house. Outside shoes should stay OUTSIDE - (obviously)
Sorry, but you MUST get rid of that dog - I don't like dogs.
Other than the above we sound like a perfect fit.
P.S. I reupholster on Saturdays - I believe that you understand that you can't be in the house in Saturdays.
The one car garage is not a problem - I always park my motorcycles in the living room anyway.
B U T
You allow MEAT to be cooked IN THE HOUSE?
Are you serious?
Meat cooking smells aggravate MY allergies and ONLY deli meat should be allowed in the house!
Further more - ONLY slippers should be allowed in the house. Outside shoes should stay OUTSIDE - (obviously)
Sorry, but you MUST get rid of that dog - I don't like dogs.
Other than the above we sound like a perfect fit.
P.S. I reupholster on Saturdays - I believe that you understand that you can't be in the house in Saturdays.
The one car garage is not a problem - I always park my motorcycles in the living room anyway.
hangnoose
Member
CRAIGSLIST ADD
Oh sure, that's OK and they refuse my add. He forgot to mention He buys his underwear at K Mart on the third Tuesday of every other month, wears them inside out for exactly 18 hours only, then washes, irons and runs them thru a shreader, burns the remains and snorts the ashes. Rainman, Sheldon Cooper, Monk and Felix Unger were turned down, as they were considered "loose cannons".
Oh sure, that's OK and they refuse my add. He forgot to mention He buys his underwear at K Mart on the third Tuesday of every other month, wears them inside out for exactly 18 hours only, then washes, irons and runs them thru a shreader, burns the remains and snorts the ashes. Rainman, Sheldon Cooper, Monk and Felix Unger were turned down, as they were considered "loose cannons".
gregintenn
Member
You should meet with him and get a copy of his handbook. It should prove interesting enough to endure the meeting.
fat tom
Absent Comrade
He should get his dam dog neutered...
It's his parents who should have been neutered,BEFORE they married.
f.t.
sipowicz
Member
He sounds like a forum Mod.
Sip that ran through my mind, but I was afraid to post it as I didn't want to be "dinged" with another infraction by the Mods.
Don
gregintenn
Member
His dog should get HIM neutered.He should get his dam dog neutered...
Smithsrevenge
Member
- Joined
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He sounds exactly like my ex gf . She made me buy a new toothbrush because "the angle of the bristles looked obscured and un-uniformed"
REALLY!?!?!?!
Sent from my XT907 using Tapatalk 2
REALLY!?!?!?!
Sent from my XT907 using Tapatalk 2
Caje, if you had bought that Nordhavn trawler a couple of years ago you could be selecting from ads like THESE:
Steve W.
2 female crew available from West Coast USA
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hello!
Myself and my good friend Hannah are currently travelling the US, after cycling from Vancouver BC to San Fran. So, we're on an adventure mission. We're both from the UK. We'd really like to build up some sea miles whilst away and are interested in heading to anywhere where there is surfing- Mexico, Hawaii etc.
I have my RYA 'competent crew' certificate and 3 weeks sea experience. Hannah is a novice, but very practical. We are both fun and easy going women.
We're pretty flexible on dates, however our US visa's run out on 8th Nov.
Please don't reply to this message if you are looking for 'young single women'. We are both young, but we are not interested in that type of trip! We're fun and adventurous and would love to help someone sail their boat, so that's our mission.
Look forward to hearing from someone
Georgie
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hello,
My name is Sophie, I'm French and I'm 25 years old. I'm on a boat since 2 month with a Colombian captain doing charter between colombia and Panama with 12 passengers aboard. I cook well, I help him when we are sailing, I clean everything and I can fix many thing. He's really happy with me.
I would like to go to Mexico or Guatemala or Belize by boat because I love this way to travel.
I really would like to go in October.
I speak French and Spanish fluently and I do my best for my English...
My humor is constant and I'm a smiling person. I'm never sea-sick.
If you are interested please contact me.
Sophie
Steve W.
2 female crew available from West Coast USA
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hello!
Myself and my good friend Hannah are currently travelling the US, after cycling from Vancouver BC to San Fran. So, we're on an adventure mission. We're both from the UK. We'd really like to build up some sea miles whilst away and are interested in heading to anywhere where there is surfing- Mexico, Hawaii etc.
I have my RYA 'competent crew' certificate and 3 weeks sea experience. Hannah is a novice, but very practical. We are both fun and easy going women.
We're pretty flexible on dates, however our US visa's run out on 8th Nov.
Please don't reply to this message if you are looking for 'young single women'. We are both young, but we are not interested in that type of trip! We're fun and adventurous and would love to help someone sail their boat, so that's our mission.
Look forward to hearing from someone
Georgie
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hello,
My name is Sophie, I'm French and I'm 25 years old. I'm on a boat since 2 month with a Colombian captain doing charter between colombia and Panama with 12 passengers aboard. I cook well, I help him when we are sailing, I clean everything and I can fix many thing. He's really happy with me.
I would like to go to Mexico or Guatemala or Belize by boat because I love this way to travel.
I really would like to go in October.
I speak French and Spanish fluently and I do my best for my English...
My humor is constant and I'm a smiling person. I'm never sea-sick.
If you are interested please contact me.
Sophie
Dude, like I'm totally motivated and down with ur OCD. Lets meet next week, I may need a reduction surgery from u2. The best of bof whirlds. Excellent slave training so no worries but I do have flashbacks from that mass at St. Figueros. Go figure. They never saw it coming.
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