charlie sherrill
Member
I ran into an old girlfriend a few days ago and it reminded me of the time she asked me to go to church with her. At the time I was a young rookie cop and she was a very pretty part time waitress at my favorite coffee shop. She lived a few miles outside a small town so I left early enough to find her house on time. I picked her up and she showed me how to get to the church. It was a small church out in the middle of nowhere. There was a small cemetery on one side, an outhouse in the back, and a pump jack with a ladle hanging on it on the other side of the church.
When we pulled up I knew immediately that I was overdressed. I was the only one there wearing a coat and tie. My date told me I could leave them in the car if I wanted to be more comfortable, which I did. All the men there were wearing work clothes or overalls. I was introduced to most of the folks there. One of them was a man named Herman. He was about 40, appeared to have Downs Syndrome and was there with his elderly parents. As we walked in Herman and his parents took a seat in the very back of the church.
After the collection plate had been passed and all the singing was over the preacher started the sermon. It was a fire and brimstone thing and I noticed some of the ladies were crying. In most Baptist churches I have been to the sermon would usually end at noon. Not this one. The preacher took off his coat, wiped the sweat from his forehead with a red bandana, got a fresh glass of water and kept preaching. At about a quarter passed 12 I heard a voice in the back that yelled out "FRIED CHICKEN!" The preacher didn't slow down. A few minutes I heard "MASHED TATERS!" Someone said Amen to the mashed taters. The preacher kept on although he did appear to be slowing down some. A few minutes later I heard "TURNIP GREENS!" and realized it was Herman telling what was on today's menu and that he was ready to eat. The turnip greens brought several amens. The sermon was winding down when "SWEET TEA!" brought a few more amens.
The preacher had said the final amen when Herman shouted "HOT APPLE PIE!" Me and several other people added to the amens. The sermon was over and my date I were walking out to shake the preacher's hand. When we got outside she asked me if I wanted to come eat dinner with her family. I told her I wanted to go to Herman's house.
When we pulled up I knew immediately that I was overdressed. I was the only one there wearing a coat and tie. My date told me I could leave them in the car if I wanted to be more comfortable, which I did. All the men there were wearing work clothes or overalls. I was introduced to most of the folks there. One of them was a man named Herman. He was about 40, appeared to have Downs Syndrome and was there with his elderly parents. As we walked in Herman and his parents took a seat in the very back of the church.
After the collection plate had been passed and all the singing was over the preacher started the sermon. It was a fire and brimstone thing and I noticed some of the ladies were crying. In most Baptist churches I have been to the sermon would usually end at noon. Not this one. The preacher took off his coat, wiped the sweat from his forehead with a red bandana, got a fresh glass of water and kept preaching. At about a quarter passed 12 I heard a voice in the back that yelled out "FRIED CHICKEN!" The preacher didn't slow down. A few minutes I heard "MASHED TATERS!" Someone said Amen to the mashed taters. The preacher kept on although he did appear to be slowing down some. A few minutes later I heard "TURNIP GREENS!" and realized it was Herman telling what was on today's menu and that he was ready to eat. The turnip greens brought several amens. The sermon was winding down when "SWEET TEA!" brought a few more amens.
The preacher had said the final amen when Herman shouted "HOT APPLE PIE!" Me and several other people added to the amens. The sermon was over and my date I were walking out to shake the preacher's hand. When we got outside she asked me if I wanted to come eat dinner with her family. I told her I wanted to go to Herman's house.
