My sister, some years ago when I was feeling old, gave me a framed quote from that great philosopher Satchel Paige:
"How old would you be if you didn't know how old you was?"
That was then. Now I'm eighty-one (she is sixty-eight) and my health has failed pretty drastically in the last couple of years. I now know very well I'm eighty-one and breaking down.
I remember my past a lot but don't dwell on it, and sometimes have to stop and think why I went into the kitchen. I think very little about the future. I know mine is limited, and the way the world is going I'm none too sure everyone's isn't. I miss the ones who have died--my wife, then both parents, then my younger brother, and countless dear friends. Another of those died just yesterday, and I doubt her husband will be around long.
But what I have to do,and what has kept me marginally sane for all these years, is to be grateful for today, and stay in it.. I can't undo my failures and nasty deeds in the past, or recreate my few triumphs. Tomorrow isn't here, and definitely is not guaranteed. I have this very minute, and I had damn well better appreciate it.
It makes life tolerable.
