How hot is it?

[Rugskipper]

It's so hot that I saw two trees fighting over a dog.
Its so hot, the squirrels are holding their nuts with potholders.
It's so hot, today I saw a chicken lay an egg over-easy.
It was so hot today Lindsay Lohan tested positive for Snapple.
Its so hot I saw a cab driver wearing an oscillating turban.
It was so hot out that North Korea test launched a long range Popsicle.
It was so hot today I saw a funeral procession pull into a Dairy Queen.
It was so hot today I saw an Amish guy buying an air conditioner.
Its so hot, you can make instant sun tea.
Its so hot, I learned that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron.
Its so hot, when the temperature drops below 95, you feel a bit chilly.
Its so hot, you get condensation on your butt from the water in the toilet bowl.
Its so hot, the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
Its so hot, your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?"
Its so hot, you realize that asphalt has a liquid state.
Its so hot, I saw a bunch of winos passing around a Dilly Bar.
Its so hot, I saw a bluebird flag down a bus.
It was so hot in Kansas City, Royals fans took the bags off their heads.
Its so hot, the Betty Ford Center said, "forget it, open the bar. Drinks for everybody".

 

[JCS&W]

It's so hot that at the Wax Museum the best parts of Dolly Parton are on the floor.

 

[Iggy]

It's so hot that the corn is poppin in the fields. The cows think it's snow and they're freezin' to death.

I watched a bunch of birds standin' in a row on the ground in the shadow of a telephone pole.They was followin' the shadow around the pole as the sun moved across the sky.

 

[vic3620]

how hot is it

my beagle was chasing a rabbit, and they were both walking.

vic3620

 

[Damn Yankee]

I've said this before,

It's so hot I had wring out the bottom of the well just to give the canary a drink.

 

[redlevel]

It's so dry here the Baptists have started sprinkling, the Methodists are using wet-wipes, the Presbyterians are giving rain checks, and the Catholics are praying for the wine to turn back to water.

 

[m1gunner]

"Oh when the sun beats down and burns the tar up on the roof. And your shoes get so hot you wish your tired feet were fire-proof."


All I can think about is shaggin at O.D.

 

[NKJ nut]

It was so hot today that hell spontaneous combusted and burnt down.

 

[RonJ]

It's so hot thar my cold bottle of V8 turned into hot tomato soup.

 

[jkc]

One hundred and twelve degrees here this afternoon, hotter forecast for tomorrow.

 

[yaktamer]

One hundred and twelve degrees here this afternoon, hotter forecast for tomorrow.

It was 114 in my driveway this afternoon. One spot on the freeway where the "sound walls" hold in the heat it was 116. Water in the pool was 94.

 

[BUFF]

It was so hot, that this morning I saw a robin pullin' a worn out of the lawn and he was using an oven mitt.

 

[blueiron]

116 predicted for tomorrow.

 

[Fishslayer]

my beagle was chasing a rabbit, and they were both walking.

vic3620

Well, my dog's a Cattle Dog.... and it was a cat...

But yeah.

 

[Bullzaye]

Its so hot, I learned that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron.

Its so hot, the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.

Its so hot, your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?"

These items are actually true during every Phoenix summer.

They're currently predicting a high of 117 today.

Tim

 

[Capt Steve]

Hottest I've seen the Tucson area in 7 years. We had 115 on our patio in the shade a couple of days ago. We have been seeing 107 to 110 just about every afternoon. Yes it is a dry heat much like a branding iron or pizza oven. (o; If the damned Monsoon would ever start things will cool down considerably, we're hoping today will be the day though downtown Tucson did get a little rain the other night. Playing golf every day but teeing it up at 0600 - done by 9 and it is only 94 (oh boy). It's about time to head back up to the mountains, 7K' or better gets it back down to the mid 80's.