Let hear em....Good quick jokes.....im first!!!!

[Jim Shugart]

I gotta bunch of'em, but most aren't HE-friendly.

Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhinoceros?

A: El-if-i-no.

(Sorry).

- Jim

 

[G-Mac]

Why do they call it P.M.S.?

Mad Cow Disease was already taken.

 

[minuteman]

Two drunks walking down a train track. First one says "This is the longest set of stairs I ever climbed." Second drunk answers "Yea, and these low handrails are killing by back".

 

[29aholic]

Here the one about the potatoe who became a sports announcer??

He always wanted to be a commontater

 

[Minnesota Fats]

There are only 10 types of people in the world. Those that understand binary, and those that don't.

 

[Jim Shugart]

Originally posted by Minnesota Fats:
There are only 10 types of people in the world. Those that understand binary, and those that don't.

Great 1st post, Fats. Stick around . . .

 

[Jeb Stonewall]

What's the first sign that your girlfriend is getting fat?


Your wifes cloths is starting to fit her!

 

[Jeb Stonewall]

My wifes a sex object.



Everytime I want sex she objects!

 

[ditrina]

Henny Youngman, Rodney Dangerfield, Totie Fields, Alan King, Buddy Hackett.. Are all looking down applauding...Great Job..

 

[john3136]

Originally posted by Minnesota Fats:
There are only 10 types of people in the world. Those that understand binary, and those that don't.

I have to object:
There are 11 types of people in the world.
Those who know binary, those who don't, and those who get the joke ;-)

 

[VAdoublegunner]

Oh, science and physics wasn't enough, now it's math jokes too?

OK, what's purple and commutes?
A: An Abelian grape.

Didn't get it? Call me -- Avogadro 602-1023.

 

[Engineer1911]

There are 2 ways to argue with a woman, neither one works.

 

[James NM]

Do you know what the difference is between broccoli and a booger?

A little kid will eat a booger.

 

[reerc]

Originally posted by Jim Shugart:

Originally posted by Minnesota Fats:
There are only 10 types of people in the world. Those that understand binary, and those that don't.

Great 1st post, Fats. Stick around . . .

Welcome to the forum, Mr. Fats!

 

[1968hawkeye]

Originally posted by john3136:
I have to object:
There are 11 types of people in the world.
Those who know binary, those who don't, and those who get the joke ;-)

I hope I got the joke. Binary consists of 1s and 0s put them together and you get binary 10 which IIRC should actually be 0010 which in decimal is 2. So there are two types of people : those who understand binary and those who don't.

Now 11 or actually 0011 would be 3, I think.

I sure hope I'm correct on this. It's amazing what you remember from about 20 years ago.

Hawkeye

 

[Jim Shugart]

^ ^ ^ ^ ^ Ya got it, Hawkeye.

Now chew on this one:

Q: Why are computer programmers all the time confusing Halloween and Christmas?

A: Because Oct 31 = Dec 25.

- Jim

 

[Jack Flash]

I like that one, Jim.

 

[Minnesota Fats]

Thanks for the welcome guys! I love this forum!

Rock, paper, scissors. To us it's just a game. In Somalia, it's a wedding registry.

 

[1968hawkeye]

Originally posted by Jim Shugart:
^ ^ ^ ^ ^ Ya got it, Hawkeye.

Now chew on this one:

Q: Why are computer programmers all the time confusing Halloween and Christmas?

A: Because Oct 31 = Dec 25.

- Jim

Jim, why did you post this? You are making my brain hurt. I can't stand the pain.

It is way to late to think about it tonight but off the top if my head I'd say that 31 in Octal and 25 in decimal are the same number. Am I close?

Hawkeye

 

[therevjay]

Two old Englismen meet on the street.

One says to the other. Terribly sorry old chap, I hear you buried your wife the other day.

Other one says, yes we had to, she died you know.