Marriage Defined
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gunnails
Member
Ha Ha, it'll be 30 years for us next June.
Mom and Dad celebrate there 60th this coming Thursday, were very proud of them and will be having a nice party for them with all there children, grand children and great grandson Saturday.
So proud of them and lucky they are still around.
Mom and Dad celebrate there 60th this coming Thursday, were very proud of them and will be having a nice party for them with all there children, grand children and great grandson Saturday.
So proud of them and lucky they are still around.
Ivan the Butcher
Member
My daughter and her husband drew three of a kind, triplet boys. Her seventh anniversary is the 29th of February, so she celebrates on the 28th. The son-in-law says, next year is the second anniversary and he only needs to buy a gift every 4 years. When they got married I told him it was a sound plan but would never fly! Ivan
williamlayton
Member
52 Years here---and clubs and spades were all over the place at times.
I have heard of folks that said they never had a cross word with their wife. I think they are liars or the marriage lasted about two days.
Mine could have killed me several times---a jury would not have convicted her.
Marriage is a hard headed contract.
Blessings
I have heard of folks that said they never had a cross word with their wife. I think they are liars or the marriage lasted about two days.
Mine could have killed me several times---a jury would not have convicted her.
Marriage is a hard headed contract.
Blessings
Rick_A
Member
Going on lucky thirteen years here.
Everything the married guys told me it would be beforehand was certainly true!
Everything the married guys told me it would be beforehand was certainly true!
MrTrolleyguy
US Veteran
diamonback68
US Veteran
Marriage is:
Marriage is an institution and love is blind,
therefore marriage is an Institution for the Blind.
Marriage is an institution and love is blind,
therefore marriage is an Institution for the Blind.
I just gotta' post this one
Once upon a time, a man asked a beautiful woman: "Will you marry
me?" The woman said, "NO!"
So……
He bought guns, cars, motorcycles, and bass boats, and used them whenever he wanted.
He drank as much beer as he wanted.
He belched and walked through the house in his underwear.
He left the toilet seat up.
Once upon a time, a man asked a beautiful woman: "Will you marry
me?" The woman said, "NO!"
So……
He bought guns, cars, motorcycles, and bass boats, and used them whenever he wanted.
He drank as much beer as he wanted.
He belched and walked through the house in his underwear.
He left the toilet seat up.
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coltle6920
Member
A store that sells new husbands has opened in Manchester, just off Deansgate where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates:
You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!
So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs
She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.
'That's nice,' she thinks, 'but I want more.'
So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.
'Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.
She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework…
'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!' Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.
She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor.. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.
PLEASE NOTE:
To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store just across the street with the same rules.
The first floor has wives that love sex.
The second floor has wives that love sex and have money and like beer.
The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited.
( Ripped off from our old friend @ Crashr )
You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!
So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs
She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.
'That's nice,' she thinks, 'but I want more.'
So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.
'Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.
She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework…
'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!' Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.
She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor.. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.
PLEASE NOTE:
To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store just across the street with the same rules.
The first floor has wives that love sex.
The second floor has wives that love sex and have money and like beer.
The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited.
( Ripped off from our old friend @ Crashr )
Dodged 2x4's, my work boots and quart bottles of Bud.
After 30 years wouldn't change a thing.
Who needs a pushover? Not I.
Gots to go, Mrs. Native made jambalaya
Marriage is a lot of give and take. You've got to give a lot more than you take. And, you've got to take a lot more than you give.
My wife and I celebrated our 35th anniversary this past August. A moment ago as she was walking toward the back of the house I asked her what was her favorite brand of gown/robe. She looked at me... smiled and answered the question. Later this week I will see what I can do about finding her something really nice that she will like. Then, in a few days for no reason at all I will drop it in the mail to be delivered to the house. She will find it when she picked up the mail. When she opens it she will get a nice surprise. It's fun to give her nice things. That's one of the joys of marriage. You get to give. Sincerely. brucev.
My wife and I celebrated our 35th anniversary this past August. A moment ago as she was walking toward the back of the house I asked her what was her favorite brand of gown/robe. She looked at me... smiled and answered the question. Later this week I will see what I can do about finding her something really nice that she will like. Then, in a few days for no reason at all I will drop it in the mail to be delivered to the house. She will find it when she picked up the mail. When she opens it she will get a nice surprise. It's fun to give her nice things. That's one of the joys of marriage. You get to give. Sincerely. brucev.
In 1993 Missus Fan and I bought an acreage from a couple I had known all my life that was moving into a nursing home. After we closed we sat in the living room talking to them. He told us they had never had an argument in that house in the 50 or so years they had lived there.
Said the most that had happened was, when they disagreed they would say " I resepectfully disagree with you, Dear".
We told them we would correct that oversight when we moved in.
Jim
Said the most that had happened was, when they disagreed they would say " I resepectfully disagree with you, Dear".
We told them we would correct that oversight when we moved in.
Jim
Who is smarter, a married man, or a single man?
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A married man, BUT IT'S TOO LATE!
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A married man, BUT IT'S TOO LATE!
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A wedding ring is like a tourniquet.....
It will cut off your circulation.
It will cut off your circulation.
Bill Bates
Member
Marriage is betting half your stuff she'll love you forever.
Old Seabee
US Veteran
Joke
Marriage is like a bank account you put it in you take it out , after awhile you loose interest.
Marriage is like a bank account you put it in you take it out , after awhile you loose interest.
