Phrases you like to use!

My mantra was borrowed from an old blues song made popular by Mississippi jazz musician Mose Allison. It simply states: "I don't worry about a thing, cause I know, nothing's gonna turn out right."
 
Many of mine would launch Lee into orbit, so I'll skip them.

One I use about the progress of the day is "if I am living the dream, why do I keep waking up screaming?"
 
I may be old, but I'm slow!
To whiners. "Cry me a river, build me a bridge and get over it!"
To a "I wish I had a...", "Yea, and if a frog had wings he wouldn't bump is rear."
 
Too soon old...too late smart!

He's like the old dog chasing the car....even if he catches it he can't drive it home!

Beauty is only skin deep but ugly goes all the way to the bone!
 
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Get Western with it
Dumber than a post [fence post]
Doesn't have the brains God gave an ant
 
My favorite I stole from my dad:
"He's not real fast but he's half-fast"
Probably usually referring to me!
 
He could screw up a one car parade.

You talk so much **** its a wonder you don't have diarrea of the mouth.

**** me to tears.

Want some cheese with that whine?

I'll slap you so hard your grandad will feel it.

I'll go medieval on your ***.

Chuck
 
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* If I could care any less I would.

* I dont call ya son cause you shine, I call ya son cause your mine.

* Wait right there I'll go get ya.
 
Arizona Commander said:
Two of my favorites at work are:

"There is a difference between doing something right and right now. Which do you want?"

and

"Poor planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part"
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I'm going to have to steal that one!

"Common sense is an uncommon virtue" A leader of mine would use that all the time. So true!
 
heres a few of mine... use em if ya like em.

**** me running (self explainatory)
Heres to stupidity and youth ( for those shoulda turnd back moments)
If I asked for your input we all woulda died awhile ago. (for that one stupid person that thinks they can fix everything)
 
"Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we choose to conceive"
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Fixed that one for ya!


"If stupid hurt, there'd be a lot of people walking around screaming."
"I could agree with you, but then we'd both be wrong."
These are a couple of my favorites.
 
With respect to managers at work: "So-n-so couldn't run a lemon aid stand."

At break time: "I have to use the men's room, can I get you anything while I'm there?"
 
"It's like watching a cave man using a camcorder."

"Hey, the Titanic was a party until it hit the iceberg."

"You got no idea how little I care."

"You look like something that came out of the northbound end of a southbound horse."

"I wouldn't trust him to sit the right way on a toilet seat."

"He could not hit water if he fell out of a boat."
 
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I slept like a baby last night...cried and wet the bed.


What doesn't hurt, doesn't work.

If I had my choice, I would be rich instead of so darn good looking...but it really hurts to be neither.


I'm not fat, I'm a motivational example for skinny people.
 
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A few that were used at home around the family:

"He / She knows as much about ________ as a pig does a parade". (Dad)

"You'll go to hell for lie'n as well as steal'n". (Mom)

"If BS was music, he'd be a brass band". (Grandpop)


LTC
 
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