Situational Disorientation

[hastings]

Have any of you ever lost a friend or failed to deepen a friendship/relationship because of your interest in firearms?

Twenty five years ago I was dating a woman who was a gifted artist. I felt like we hit it off on many levels, but one day after speaking to an old friend on the phone she asked me what we had talked about, not in an rude way, just curious. I explained that my friend and I had enjoyed shooting rifles and reloading, and we were reminiscing about those times. It was like I threw water in her face. She became hostile, insisted I get rid of any guns I might still have, and break off any associations with friends who shared this interest. I tried to reason with her, but from her perspective I had just become the antichrist.

Long story short, I explained that while guns were not more valuable to me than her, my experiences and friendships that had developed around hunting, skeet shooting, and the outdoor sporting lifestyle, were part of who I was and if she couldn't accept them she would not be happy with me for very long. End of relationship. I subsequently met and married my wife and mother of my three children, and couldn't be happier with the way things turned out.

Then, recently, my daughter (7years old at the time) developed a friendship with a classmate who lived a short distance away. Her parents are vegetarian, yoga practicing new age types. I have nothing against any of that, and was happy with the friendship my daughter had found. One day, the child's parents called to set up a play-date. My wife suggested an alternative day because we were going target shooting (as a family). The child's family immediately stated that their child was not allowed to come to our house and they were not comfortable with the relationship any longer. I tried to explain that our firearms were locked safely away, and we teach safe gun handling to our children, but that it was a multigenerational family tradition, not a terrorist activity. Unfortunately there was no reasoning with them. Mention guns to some people and you'd think you just grew horns or asked them to hunt baby seals.

Anyone else have any extreme reactions as a result of normal, responsible gun ownership or sportsmanship activities? It sort of makes you feel dizzy, and disoriented, when hunting and responsible defense of your family are viewed as aberrant and criminal behaviors. And this is in rural Vermont. What's it like in other states? It might help me deal with the total absurdity of it all to know what and how others are dealing with.

Bewildered in VT
Hastings

 

[Bullseye 2620]

It's a sad commentary. We've got some of these folks here too, and I find the judgmentalism masked in rectitude and absolute certainty to be very repellant. I am sorry your daughter lost a friend, but she is gaining experience in real values education. You're in the right here. Later your daughter may choose to become an accomplished hunter, shooter, and outdoorswoman. Too bad the other child will not have that opportunity.


Bullseye

 

[scooter123]

I'd be willing to bet those parents don't have any male children.

My sister was anti gun and swore that her children would never have any toy guns. That lasted until her first born was about 3 1/2 when she found that anything that bore even a broadly passing resemblence to a gun could be used in "shootouts". When he was 4 or 5 I caught her purchasing toy pop guns for both my nephew and his little sister who was at the tag along stage. When I called her on that purchase I learned that little boys can be quite immoveable in some respects, meaning that acquiring and using "weapons" is probably instinctive and resistance is futile. She felt that pop guns were a lot safer than a stick sharpened on a sidewalk.

 

[ace22]

hastings, over the years i've passed on relationships with women that had basically the same reaction as the one you mentioned.
if they couldn't or wouldn't understand that just because someone owns guns they're not son of sam then there's no use in investing any time in them.

 

[crsides]

I grew up in NC and lived most of my adult life in SC. We just don't see that kind of attitude down here ... except for some of the transplants.


Charlie

 

[Rickyyy]

Good riddance. I only associate with gun owners!
Just kidding. But I do have a buddy who's mother won't let him keep a gun in the house.

 

[P&R Fan]

The fact this Woman insisted you get rid of your guns and break off any contact with your like-minded friends tells me what she was looking for. She wanted an adult male person she could control. She certainly wasn't interested in a Man.
I'd look her up, she's probably in Congress today.

 

[XAVMECH]

Been there. If it's a problem, you should know up front. When my wife and I first started seeing each other, she came to visit me at my island cabin. I had an old Winchester '94 hanging on the wall in the loft. When she came up the steps and spied it there across the loft (my bedroom), she said: "Is that a Winchester '94?" When I answered in the affirmative, she said: "I've got two of those". As we moved forward with our relationship, I realized (among other things) that I had bought a gun safe that was too small....

 

[jeffrey]

I live in a hotbed of New Age and liberal idiocy -- Santa Fe, NM -- and have had quite a few possible friendships go south once people learned that I have guns and like to shoot. I refuse to hide what I do and if people disapprove, well, that's their problem.

Very early one morning, I was pulling out of my driveway to go hunting when a neighbor (and "kind of" friend) out walking her dog asked me where I was going so early. When I told her, she expressed the hope that I found nothing to shoot. I asked her since when she had become a vegetarian. Funny, she hasn't asked us to dinner since.

And when people learn that I have guns, they often say, "but at least you don't have one on you right now!" That's the only time that I do keep my mouth shut.

One odd thing. Several times I have run into guys at my gun club (about an hour's drive from Santa Fe) who I know in town and who have never mentioned guns or shooting. When I do see them there (sighting in their rifles), they have asked me not to bring up shooting when we are around other people. It's as though I had seen them at a strip club! It's really sad when the anti-gun zealots scare gun people into silence.

Thank goodness I'm married to a woman who likes to shoot!

 

[LedFowl]

As we moved forward with our relationship, I realized (among other things) that I had bought a gun safe that was too small....

This is great.

 

[woodsltc]

To the original poster...............count yourself very lucky!! Just think how miserable your life would have been if you had married that harpy!!!

Don

 

[XAVMECH]

Yup, she's a keeper!

 

[Old 44 Guy]

This brings back memories. When I was looking for a wife I once dated a real nice looking gal that went to UC Berkeley. A better uneducated gal I've never been around. Everyting was Taboo except wild sex & drinking. No smoking, church, guns, violence, etc. Of course she had a baby girl out of wedlock [Not Mine] But that was understandable she said. I wonder where she is today?Probably in Govt. Service.

 

[beach elvis]

Want some irony?
I'll try to make this quick.

When I lived in Nashville, a buddy who had his CCW license was starting to date this smokin' hot chick singer. Now, the vast majority of the U.S. musical community is extremely liberal and this chanteuse was no exception. (We came to call her "Sheila Of The Nasty Ol' Gun".) He put up with it because hey, she WAS smokin' hot, c'mon. He never said anything to her about being a gun owner.

Anyway, at one point she noticed that he was carrying when they were on a date and, right there on the street, LOST HER MIND on this guy. A loud, tearful tirade that went on for a couple of minutes about how she didn't want to be within a mile of a gun, and all they're good for is hurting people, and since he had one, he must be another sadistic XXXXXX too.

Ol' bud had a bellyfull and decided,"Date's over." but being the gentleman that he was brought up to be, he decided to walk her home the few blocks from where they were. On the way there, a couple meth heads came out from an alley, pointed pistols at my friend and his former date, and "requested" their money. Chick singer says to my bud, "You have a gun too! Shoot them, you idiot!"

Two non-life threatening 9mm's to his leg and a trip to the E.R. later, my bud told her, "You're proof positive that liberals are more dangerous than any gun could ever be."

 

[NFrameFred]

Beach Elvis, the only lesson that bimbo took from the encounter was that she was right about guns to begin with, and would never consider her big mouth was responsible for his injuries. People like that are toxic - they hardly ever learn.

 

[beach elvis]

Beach Elvis, the only lesson that bimbo took from the encounter was that she was right about guns to begin with, and would never consider her big mouth was responsible for his injuries. People like that are toxic - they hardly ever learn.

Yeppir, can't fix stupid.

 

[yaktamer]

Re: The original post. Not to quibble, but I thought clubs were the preferred weapon for baby seals. She probably wouldn't have let you play baseball either

 

[Maximumbob54]

I cannot answer this and not get pinged for sounding all political. So instead I will just put on my tinfoil hat once again and remind everyone that Hollywood may just be winning.

 

[Marshwheeling]

What might surprise you is the number of liberals I know who love to shoot. My wife has eight brothers who all voted for Obama, hate Scott Walker and seven of them are avid hunters and shooters. The only one who doesn't was a combat infantryman in Vietnam, scarred by the experience, and now does not keep guns around. I have another buddy, former state ACLU board member, who owns several guns and loves to shoot. A third, a leftish fine art photographer, is an avid collector. Then I have a law school buddy who hunted as a kid, but no longer has any interest in hunting or guns. But he has a 20-year-old college sophomore son who came back for the holidays, called me up and wanted to buy me a cigar. He and his dad were both tickled when I suggested we go to the range first before sitting down to burn one. Dad declined to accompany us, but I called my son and we three made a fine afternoon of it. OTOH, an ex girlfriend who is the young man's godmother has been heard to say I have corrupted her godson.

But living as I do near a liberal city, and being of a leftish bent myself, I must confess I do run into folks who can't countenance guns. The worst was a granola-headed fellow upon whom my pal Petey and I relied for occasional specialist work on our English 3-speeds. Petey warned me not to bring up guns in front of this guy, but one day Petey was at his house after a trip to the range and some .22 brass fell out of his pants cuff. As Petey described it, the chill was palpable, and he can no longer get his calls returned. I don't know yet if I have been tarred by association.

 

[DeathGrip]

Marshwheeling,Whats an English 3-speed?

And,Yes you have most likely been tarred.