Were you bullied as a Child or Adult.

[carpriver]

Is bulling some thing that has developed in the last few years or has it been going on forever?

I was picked on twice. Once in Jr. high school and once in high school. In junior high I was a new 7th grader and a 8th grader thought he was some kind of special person and got off on making underclassmen cry. He targeted me in the hall away before class. He started pushing and poking me calling my names (sissy boy). I didn't cry, I have an older brother that was better at getting me to cry then this guy. When I didn't give him what he wanted he told me he would break me.

My big brother heard about the kid picking on me. When I got home my brother was waiting for me. I told me if I didn't stand up for myself this guy would make my life miserable.
The next morning at my locker the kid and his friends came for me. He came up and started poking me; I pulled back my arm and swung my fist and hit the kid in his left ear. A teacher saw the conflict and we were taken to the principals office. No one was expelled. We did have to spend our lunch time in the office for a week. We never did become friends but he didn't bother me either.

When I started the 10th grade a week or 2 into the new school year one kid didn't like me, don't know way. I was the new kid in school as my family moved across the state because of my dads job.

This kid ambushed me as I was getting on the bus to go home. He hit me in the back of the head with I think was his fist. The next day at school I saw him standing across the street from school smoking. I when across the street and when he turned to look in my direction I hit him as hard as I could in the nose. He went to his knees and the blood poured out of his nose. I walked back to school. We never became friends and he never bothered me again. I took my brother advice and it worked for me.

How did you handle your bully?

What is the best way to deal with the problem of bullying?

 

[the ringo kid]

Happened to em a few times.

1) I was in the 6th grade and two Mexican American kids decided I was worthy of picking on and it went on for few months--pushing--making me drop my books ll over the place--tipping over my desk in classroom. Well one day after school as I was walking home, both Emmett and Michael (their real 1st names) tried to push me around and I finally exploded. I busted Emmetts glasses still on his face, and he ran off0and I busted Michael and ripped his jacket and he ran off threatening to get his older brothers after me. Later that same year--I was friends with both, and also a pallbearer at Michaels funeral about 10 years later.

2) One kid who thought he was tough used to come through my neighborhood. Joseph Yow, used to always threaten me when I walked the back alleys to go to the store to buy comic books on Tuesdays-knowing I always had a few bucks with em. One time in particular--he and some dork he nicknamed "Ajax" were hiding in a large tree--it was night time and I was walking home from a friends house--and Joseph jumped from the tree and started swinging homemade numchucks. Told "Ajax" to get behind me and grab my arms. However, I was walking home "armed" with an old US Army Bayonet that I had just paid $3 bucks for-from the friend whose home I just left. Yow tried hitting me wiht his cheap chucks--and one of the broomstick pieces broke off and I started to laugh. I pulled out my bayonet and held Joseph at bay--while "Ajax" wet his pants and ran away-quickly followed by Yow. Several years later--I was friends with Joseph You and instead of being in Prison like everyone figured would happen since all three of his older brothers already had been in and out--be moved to Louisiana somewhere, and is now or was--a Priest.

3) Erich had been a friend once--we were camping for a Boyscout weekend camp trip, and I had money on me. As we shared the same tent--I woke up hearing a ripping sound--the sound of velcro when one tirs to open something it is attached to, and knowing I was the only one with a wallet--I caught the dork red-handed stealing money out of my wallet. I punched him in the mouth and saying nothing to him--he handed back my money and I then kicked him out of the tent.

years later--he tried to rob me at knife point when I was walking home from school, and he pulled a cheapo pocket knife and aimed it at me. I kicked it out of his hand and the blade broke. The knife went one way--Erich ran the other as fast as possible. I was never friends with him again.

 

[DeadAye]

I've posted this before - But it's been a while....
My nephew has cerebral palsy and is, has been, and most likely always will be confined to a wheel chair. His *little* sister is a big girl.
(This happened in high school - They've both graduated a few years ago)

Some football player idiot started picking on Danny and pushed his chair into a corner. Unfortunately Alison saw him. She turned him around and told him to leave her brother alone.
He said *Oh yeah - what are YOU going to do about it?*
She knocked him out with one punch!

My sister got called to school - they explained the situation to her and asked if she had anything to say to Alison?

My sister said *IF this EVER happens again don't knock him out till the third punch.

 

[rojodiablo]

My given Hawaiian name drew tons of harassment and name calling.

I have been known to extract a pound of flesh for my troubles, eventually.

Plain and simple, I fought a lot in school. It never really stopped. You'd get it from one guy or group of guys. You'd give him the business.
He'd do it again, twice as much the next day with friends around. You'd fix the problem proper the second time. And then take 3 days off from school.
When you got back, a few would not associate with young Sire busted face. But a fool would always pick up the flag and run with it. So, you'd shove the flag where the sun don't shine. Then, the school would have a talk with your parents and you. And in the end, Dad would stick up for me and tell them "He's not going to stand for it, and I am TELLING him now- he does not have to take it from them."
Then, you find yourself with only a few friends who are also strange in some way and not in some clique.
And then, later, they get tired of getting pounded on. Being the kid of a rich snob gets you nice clothes. It also gets blood on them when you do it wrong. Rich noses tend to bleed a lot more than poor kids' noses from what I remember.

My son got bullied once. He fought back. Right in front of the principal, the other kids' mom and dad, and the school psychologist I TOLD my son " Do NOT start any fights. If that kid ever picks on you again, you will not fight him; you will beat him as hard as you can. Do you understand me? (To the principal; Do YOU understand me?)

They told me even though John did not start the fight, and it was not his fault and he was only protecting himself, he was suspended, and this was to be a learning lesson for him. The principal then asked me what I would do to teach my son a lesson from this incident?

I told him: " I am taking the rest of the day off and we are going fishing. Tomorrow, I will wake him up early and drop him off at the lake so he can go fishing. Friday...... He is going fishing. He will have a fun weekend fishing on the boat, and then will be back at school on Monday. The only lesson he is going to learn from this is that at 12 years old, he is already smarter than his principal."

Funny thing was- on Monday??? The kid took after John like a shot! In the parking lot, still riding his bike to school and the kid went after him; bruised up nose and all. John raged on that kids' nose. Tore the kid up real good. The kid was 14, and 8th grade. About the same size, give or take. he had no idea just how mad John was at him and how scared he was of being attacked by the kids 4 or 5 friends. So he did as he was told, and did not stop hitting until the teachers pulled him off.
They sent the other kid to a different school. It was that, or I sued the district. And I NEVER- EVER missed an opportunity to bully the principal and remind him just how incompetent he was. He had to deal with that for 2 and a half years. Made his existence there a living hell.

That said; there is no bully meaner than a person who was bullied and then turns the tables. But some actually deserve it. Some even EARN it.

 

[Gunslinger808]

Yup, a few times cause I was small.
Whooped on them and that was the end of it.
I'm still friends with One of them after 35 years.

I've always fought dirty (read to win) so I'll put yer nadgers right around yer glasses.
A preemptive strike to the forks does wonders.

 

[LouisianaJoe]

I had an uncle that would sneak up behind me and slap me on the back almost hard enough to knock me down and would say "How are you doing Joe?". When I grew up, I was almost a head taller and 50 lbs heavier. I slapped him on the back pretty hard and said "How are you doing now?" He never said a word and I felt much better.

As a child, I was skinny and weak from having asthma most of the time. I endured some abuse. At my 10 year HS reunion, I was taller and larger than some of the prior abusers. Most stayed on the other side of the room. I did shake hands with one of them and demonstrated how much my grip had improved over the years.

I developed an approach to life. Always respect everyone until they prove to you that they do not deserve respect.

 

[Rick_A]

I got bullied at almost every grade level.

In first grade getting kicked in the face down a slide was the last straw after continual and incessant harassment. I cornered him in a tire house and slapped him around. He cried and begged for me to leave him alone. He never so much as looked me in the face again.

Several years later a big A-hole threatened me daily. He cornered me in the locker room and as soon as he told me he was going to beat me up I punched him, got him on the ground and kept hitting him until he started crying. He was so tall I had to practically jump to land that first swing on him. I got a standing ovation from my classmates for that one.

In middle school one of the "bad kids" loved to poke fun at me, push me around, and take my glasses. In a fit of rage I picked him up and put him in a trash can. Fed up with his antics, anytime he put his hands on me I'd punch him in the head. He tried to jump me with a few friends after school. I hit him in the gut like my life depended on it and he went down. When I asked who was next his friends (all older and bigger...any of them could've probably got the better of me) told me they had "no beef" with me.

In junior high a big football player would get more brazen with me every day. I figured I'd have to fight him eventually and prepared myself mentally for it (also thought I'd take a good licking). He slapped me in the face one day out of the blue, and seemed to think it was pretty funny. I told him that if he was looking for a fight he had one. He backed down, apologized, and said he wasn't looking to fight. That surprised me. He never got physical with me again.

In high school a kid that loved gaining notoriety through fights was making a lot of derogatory and inflammatory remarks behind my back. We met in the hall between classes with predictable results. After a shoving match he was loosing I got punched in the jaw. I returned a blow to his eye and he then ran away from me. As the fight was over, I grabbed him and threw him around until a couple of jocks broke it up by tackling the both of us. We were interrogated by the chemistry teacher where he started crying. The teacher felt we'd both learned some and let us be.

Keep in mind through all these years I was scrawnier and shorter than most girls my age. I was quiet and had no friends so people assumed I was an easy target. I was no tough guy, just determined to fight it out rather than get pushed around. Most teachers seemed amused to see the little guy on top and I never got in trouble for it.

I was not totally innocent. I would beat up a French foreign exchange student that would not stop belittling me verbally. He never really fought back, and unfortunately never shut up.

I also shoved a hemophiliac in first grade that was used to being able to say whatever derogatory comments he wanted to whomever he pleased due to his condition. My teacher gave me a stern talk over that one. He never smacked talked me again, which I felt was worth it. It was literally, non stop until that point.

For the most part, I was a scrawny loser. I liked to draw, liked science, and preferred to keep to myself. When I liked the class and the teacher I'd get good grades, too.

 

[don5]

Well, I am the son of a career Navy Chief, grew up during the sixties, was in 13 schools by the time I was 14, have 2 little sisters and was smaller than most kids. Yeah, I did some fighting growing up. Some I won, one I didn't but the kid never tried again. What I learned was this. When someone threatens you, they have already thought about getting physical with you in their mind. They are trying to intimidate you. My motto was-as soon as I was threatened, and it did not matter where or who was watching- hit the guy right in the mouth or nose right then. I mean to say that I made sure they saw their blood. Even when I lost they knew it would not be easy to beat on me-ever. Yes-I got in trouble when I got home from mom. My reason was that "dad said to be the man of the house while he was gone and I am not getting picked on." I never started a fight but I never ran either. Only one time that I ever faced a kid and didn't fight that I really wanted to beat the snot out of a kid. I was in 9th grade, this guy was in 8th grade and a bully. I had seen him picking on other kids in school. I told him to throw the first punch because I was going to clean his clock and then I smiled. He shut up and walked away. Years later this same guy killed another man who was severely intoxicated at a party one night. BTW- I learned my fighting tactics/tips as I was growing up from other boys. They were mostly the sons of Marines!!! Imagine that....
I have also talked to my son about this topic and let him know that I expect him to defend himself. His mother, who is a school teacher in the same district, does not share my philosophy about this subject. I told my son not to worry about his mom, I will answer to her later. He has not had any problems like I did growing up. Sorry for the long post guys...

 

[chud333]

Dad was a 20 year Marine so my 2 brothers and I we're never in the same schools for more than a couple years before he got stationed somewhere else. We had just started school and i was in the 7th grade at Beaufort, S.C. where dad was just stationed. I walked out to the playground and started to play some basketball with the group of boys out there. This big ole red headed kid came over and snatched the ball out of my hands and shoved me saying, "hey kid your new you can't play with my ball". At this point i decided "nows a good a time as any to show these kids i'm not going to be their whippin' boy", and i proceeded to whup it up with this kid who was a full head taller than I.
I ended up getting him on the ground and wrestled him until i got the upper hand and was straddling his chest throwing haymakers to his face.
We became best friends and we're inseparable for 2 years. I still remain in contact with him to this day. Greg Meagher, a LEO in S.C.

Chuck

 

[duppie]

I and a friend were top dogs in primary school but never bullied anyone then went to an all boys high school and had my *** handed to me more than once but it was just the "rights of passage" more than anything else,those very same upperclassmen were ready to fight for me when I encountered some trouble over a young lady,her ex boyfriend from another school and all his classmates.
I believe we use the word bullying too much and it has become a descriptive to explain away everything from harmless ribbing to full blown mental issues.....let's face it we've all been "bullied" and most are stronger,wiser and more resilient because of it.

We're just not making or raising our children right these days and now bullying is just another buzzword to explain and excuse our shortcomings.

 

[Roadtrash]

I was a little skinny red headed kid so I was fair game until I turned 12. That's when I started to grow and soon was as big or bigger than the other kids. Once I got to be as large as they were they started to leave me alone because they found out that I would be there till the fight was over and I was not a push over.

After I left a few of the "bad guys" bleeding the bully's would leave me alone. You'd hear them say to other kids "leave him alone he's crazy". This came from the fact that I wouldn't stop till someone drug me off the other guy.

I never started fights but learned early on that if you ran they would never leave you alone. You might take a beating if you stand and fight but when it was over they wouldn't bother me again, I left my marks on them.

By the time I was in high school even the bullies had learned to leave me alone as I was a fair sized kid at 6' 1" and about 190. Not to mention that by this time I had learned to handle myself pretty good. I became the one that stopped people from picking on the little kids by just walking up and letting them know if they kept at it they had me to fight and that would usually be enough.

I have been around for a long time and things have changed a lot in my lifetime. I still believe that getting in a fight once in a while was part of growing up, as someone else said a right of passage. I think that today we are growing a generation of wusses by not letting kids settle some of their issues with a little tussle now and then. You need to establish your place in society early on or you have trouble later on.

I think this is one reason there is so much cyber bullying today. The bullys are never taken to task so they think they can pick on others at will. A few bloody noses would stop most of this kind of thing before it got out of hand.

But I'm just an old guy that grew up in a different time I guess. Sure glad I'm not a kid in today's society, I'd probably never make it through school.

 

[Harrison]

Yes, as a young adult during the early 1960s at Fr. Leonard Wood, Mo. My Senior DI and Assistant DI bullied myself and my entire basic training platoon unmercifully. We were constantly yelled at, called names, forced to do countless pushups (often in the mud), and forced to run until we dropped. Sometimes we were struck on the legs with a 50cal cleaning rod for being out of step when marching. This bullying lasted for weeks and impressed itself on my memory. One platoon member fought back against the bullying and was eventually forced out of basic training and the Army. I have heard that basic training in the modern Army is much kinder and gentler. No longer are recruits made to feel like they are %$##@**, and not fit to were the uniform.

I don't recall any bullying in school. At one time in elementary school, one of the other boys tried to take my marbles. I punched him in the mouth. and he left me alone after that. We got a lecture about fighting from the principle.

 

[Brian41]

I got teased about my Canadian accent in grade school a lot. I was always smaller than kids my age and took me awhile to catch up with them in size.
One big kid, Duke, picked on me and told me he was going to beat me up if he caught me on the way home from school. I was terrified and ran home from school for days until Duke finally caught up with me to give me a beating. Funny thing was I wound up beating him up instead and afterwards I never had any problem with him.
Had a guy in high school get upset with me about a foul in basketball during gym class. He'd been taunting me before about what a lousy basketball player I was and challenged me to a fight after school. Well of course half the school showed up to see the fight. I had no desire to fight the guy and basically defended myself until he slipped a punch in and bloodied my nose. Then I got upset and proceeded to kick his butt even though he too was bigger than me. He never bothered me after that.

I guess in those days we handled things ourselves unlike today. Believe me I was scared both of these times beforehand but was raised to stick up for myself and did.
I can't see a kid protecting himself even today and not getting in trouble at school. Too bad as we're raising some wimps that'll never stand for themselves.

 

[mg357]

Because i am disabled i was bullied in school i was also picked on because of my last name i got in 2 fights the first fight i won.

the second fight was broken up before i could finish the job and the bully and i got hauled down to the dean's office i got chewed out by the dean. The bully got detention.

I was also bullied at 2 different jobs and i was forced to resign because the bullying was so bad.

 

[imashooter2]

I was a very small child. I got picked on a lot. Discovered that if you just punched them in the face, you would get beat up one time, but then they would find someone else to pick on that didn't get them punched.

Of course that was in a different time when a guy on the ground didn't get kicked in the head until he bled from the ears...

 

[CAJUNLAWYER]

maybe under todays standards I was but in all honesty I got to say no. I took some licks-gave some licks and pretty much survived intact. Never had to call in parents-we just took care of our business and it all washed out in the end.
I see lots of that stuff today in my practice and one of my more satisfying moments is facing down bullies whether it is a judge, lawyer or opposing party

 

[NYlakesider]

Just like the term road rage being used for everything that happens around a vehicle the term bulling is being way stretched out and used wrong IMNSHO!

The kids of today appear to not be able to handle things because of the mindset of a vocal portion of the population forcing their agenda. Enough said I do not want this post yanked!

Bulling has gone on for millenniums and will continue, there is really no way other than having a kid walk with a bodyguard to prevent this. What worked well in the past works today if you have the gonads to do what must be done. I was bullied when I left a sedate religious school and went into the public system back in the real early 60s. I was a big strong kid but not a fighter and I got pushed around as the NEW KID. Then it progressive to taking my lunch and when I stopped brown bagging they went after my 75 cents.

Made my mind up what I was going to do. The next time one or more of the punks accosted me no matter what teacher/s principals were watching I was going to strike out. It happened in the hallway during class change they got me and started slapping me on the back of the head and ears. I turned around suddenly and as hard as I could I hit the leader square in the mouth, he went down and started bleeding profusely. His friends backed off fast and even with a couple teachers close no one saw me. I got threatened a bit from that crew but I never got bullied again. "You do what you got to do"< one of my favorite quotes that I still live by>

 

[Comrad]

That term is about as overused and inappropriate most of the time as the use of the name assault rifle. How about that Miami Dolphin lineman who walked out because of bullying? Wow, the phrase "grow a pair comes to mind."
I think zero tolerance has helped fuel the bullying problem. Back in the day as has been mentioned here, all you needed to do in most cases was to defend yourself and most bullies immediately fold. Today if the victim throws a punch he's probably in more trouble than the bully. I want my old country back.

 

[Stevens]

Not outside the usual hazing the first year in a military academy high school. It was the same for everyone in the first year so I guess it wasn't real bullying.
Steve W

 

[RonJ]

Somewhat! I was tall and skinny and my best defense was to run away. Funny, at school I was bullied and just took it. But if the bullies came around my house where my Dad could see, I was pure terror. The ones who came to my house never bothered me at school again.