I agree with many of the other posters. Your 3" 65 probably has the best balance between controllability and shootability of any DA revolver. I've carried mine IWB with very little difficulty, using only an untucked shirt for a covering garment.
You don't need to carry it with heavy loads, unless you want to. I've carried the Speer 135gr Short-Barrel GDHP in both .357 Magnum and .38 Special +P. The heaviest load I carried and shot in it was Buffalo Bore standard pressure .38 Special 158gr LSWCHP. My favorite load, though, was the Winchester 110gr SJHP in .357 Magnum, but there was just too much muzzle flash for me to use it as a self-defense load.