Why I Don't Talk To People About Concealed Carry

[ClayCow]

When i used to carry, my friends knew. I dont see the harm in that, telling strangers though, i sure dont do.

 

[Smoke]

This was originally posted on a different forum by a user name Sam Spade

The fact is that most people's version of "concealed means concealed" relies heavily on others' lack of perception and on people generally being lost in their own little bubble. It relies far too heavily on that, IMO. Once you get into a world where someone's actually looking for concealed weapons, the average guy's odds of being "made" go up. And once you get into a situation where the attention is actually on you specifically, the odds skyrocket. Yeah, yeah, that doesn't happen much. I'm writing about when it *does*.

"Being Gray" means fading into the background of where you're moving. There is no one formula for this, because what works in a law office doesn't work in a garage. The one exception to this is the guy who dresses and carries himself like a janitor. That level of service worker can move about most anywhere and be like everyone else, or be overlooked by everyone else. Let me start by talking about what *isn't* gray.
• Gun gear isn't grey. This means exposed Wilderness belts, cute little raven pins on your hat, as well as the more obvious Tshirts.
• Political wear isn't grey. It invites attention from both people who share the advertised views and people who oppose the advertised views. In the case of 3per, Gasden or similar advertisements, it invites LE scrutiny of your hands and waistband. Sorry, guys. I'm writing about the world as it is, not as some would wish it.
• Cover garments beyond an untucked polo or workshirt aren't grey in warm weather. The number of people wearing vests (or worse, photographer's vests) compared to the number of people who use them to cover a gun? C'mon.
• 5-11s aren't gray (I'm alternating spellings because I can ) There are plenty of Colombia or similar cargo pants that are quite popular. 5-11s and clones, though, are cop clothes. Cops look at people who look like them, crooks look at people who look like cops.
• "Loud" colors aren't gray. Red attracts the eye. Neon attracts the eye. Bright attracts the eye. Attracting the eye invites being remembered, being scrutinized, and having your CCW noticed.
• Pocket clips (folding knives) and pouches aren't grey. The crook is looking for an easy score. Seeing the clip from a knife makes him look harder before he looks away. The cop on "scan" is looking for weapons, and seeing an indicator of one he'll look for others. Belt pouches mean electronics mean stuff to steal to the crook. Seeing one piece of temptation, he's ready to look for others.
• Posture and actions different from the crowd isn't grey. Stay to the right, go with the flow, walk, don't run. Being alert and attentive is good for you. Having your head on a swivel is doing an imitation of a crook looking for witnesses. There's a fine line on that last.

This was what gave me the idea for this thread and there are a few points he makes far better than I did

"Loud" colors aren't gray. Red attracts the eye. Neon attracts the eye. Bright attracts the eye. Attracting the eye invites being remembered, being scrutinized, and having your CCW noticed.

Not giving up my Hawaiians sorry

 

[The Big D]

The opposite!

I am the opposite of a 'grey man'...for sure.

I drive very distinctive vehicles...personalized plates make them even more distinctive. I am well recognized in my city...I am out and about most days and nights. I usually wear bright colors... I wear neon green shorts on occasion, many items of clothing are pink or bright red, and I usually wear colorful ties when wearing a suit or sport coat. Heck, I even own/wear neon yellow and grass green casual shoes. (Two different pair; not both colors on same shoes.)

That said, I can count the number of times I have been 'made' on one hand. Just once by a LEO who approached me in a DC beerroom and quietly inquired...at the same time advising me another LEO was watching our interaction.

I don't wear 5-11 gear, photo vests, NRA caps, or 'gunbelts.' I usually carry a j-frame and use an IWB Remora...with shirt tucked when required.

My point? 'Grey' is not required; discreet CCW can be accomplished by proper concealment...and not acting all squirrely whilst in public. For me, 'condition orange' describes my golf course attire on regular occasions.

Be safe.

 

[John R]

For me to know, for you to find out.

 

[loknload]

I've posted this several times in regards to type of subject and this is my take on the whole subject very simply put!

Don't Ask! , Don't Tell!

No one needs to know my business and what's in my pockets!

 

[canesfan33068]

I was behind a car in traffic with a Don't Tred on Me license plate (brilliant yellow) and the letters spelled something to the effect that the driver was "ticked off." A "Glock Perfection" sticker on the back window completed the picture of the Bright Orange Man out for a drive.

Here in Virginia the "Don't Tread On Me" Tags are a bright orange/yellow color. I see this on Jeeps and Pickups all over. Usually with AK-47/AR-15 Stickers.

 

[canesfan33068]

Twenty years ago a friend who was also a room mate was going through the Police Academy. He told me that one of the Instructors gave them a lecture on taking note of stickers and license plate frames on vehicles that are stopped or in front of residences when responding to calls. The idea being NRA and Military or Patriotic Stickers and Decals should be seen as a sign you are about to come into contact with not only someone armed but perhaps someone armed and with tactical training.

 

[ClayCow]

You know. I still dont understand why people stay so silent about carrying. Sure you dont need to blab your mouth in public and you dont need to advertise, but i dont see anything wrong in sharing.

I could see someone telling somekne else and someone else overhearing you have a gun and that person trying to steal your gun. Sure. If you win scratch its and the lottery alot, this could be you. But id think it highly unlikely 5th hand information making it to a criminal who actually acts on it, to be feasible in any way.

What i do consider, is say that you carry and your family or close friend doesnt know. Say in worst case, youre shot dead but your friend or family member isnt. Wouldnt it be good for them to know you were carrying so that they may try and get your gun to defend themselves? Im more likely than not describing something out of a movie, but its no different or more unreasonae than the fears many of you harbor about carrying.

 

[John H/PA]

I don't discuss what underwear I'm wearing, so why would I discuss what else is under my outer garments?

 

[ClayCow]

I do believe people do discuss what youre wearing, or else there wouldnt be fancy t shirts or jackets or pants. But im not saying just blurt it out to people, im talking about conversation if it comes up, i dont see why people need to be so secretive about it. Your underpants and a gun are quite different. You can try and substitute one for the other, but you will probably achieve mixed results.

 

[Rastoff]

You know. I still dont understand why people stay so silent about carrying. Sure you dont need to blab your mouth in public and you dont need to advertise, but i dont see anything wrong in sharing.

Look back in this thread and you'll see at least a few examples of why it's not necessarily a good idea to let people know. There has been much discussion about this right here in this thread. The answer is there if you'll only read these posts.

Of course, this could fall under the heading, "If you have to ask, you wouldn't understand." Nothing wrong with your methodology, just respect others who don't want anyone to know unless they tell them themselves.

It's OK that you don't understand why someone wouldn't want anyone to know. You don't have to operate that way. Just know that most don't and would prefer that you not tell if you knew.

 

[ClayCow]

Look back in this thread and you'll see at least a few examples of why it's not necessarily a good idea to let people know. There has been much discussion about this right here in this thread. The answer is there if you'll only read these posts.

Of course, this could fall under the heading, "If you have to ask, you wouldn't understand." Nothing wrong with your methodology, just respect others who don't want anyone to know unless they tell them themselves.

It's OK that you don't understand why someone wouldn't want anyone to know. You don't have to operate that way. Just know that most don't and would prefer that you not tell if you knew.

Oh no i read through all the posts. I just think people are making a bigger deal than it is. I respect their option to not speak about it, i wont ever push for someone to be more vocal in that sense. Im repeating myself a bit now, i just think the reasoning is based on faulty or paranoid assumptions(paranoid in the non derogatory sense). Not meaning to offend anyone, as i know i have my own quirks that others cant understand.

I know when i got my ccw i talked to two of my gun owner friends about ccw and of course my roommate. I actually thought this was quite normal. I even encouraged them and my other friends to get ccw which has got some of them thinking. Anyways im blabbing now : )

 

[Smoke]

One reason I haven't obtained my license yet is because I don't think I should have to tell an officer that I have a firearm on me if I get pulled over for a traffic stop. If they ask me, I'll tell them, but it is really no ones' business.

What state are you in

 

[Yiogo]

I keep a low profile. No decals on my gun box. No signs on my car. No gun hats. I carry concealed. No one knows except family.
Yiogo

 

[WR Moore]

Over the decades, I've acquired an interesting collection of logo festooned shirts and/or hats. I only wear them at competitions. Heck, I don't even have the logo stuff visible on the way to the matches.

 

[ChattanoogaPhil]

I just think people are making a bigger deal than it is.

As a group, gun owners probably suffer more from overthink than most others.
As far as this topic, like most, a little common sense goes a long way.

Chatting up a stranger at a bar about your carry gun isn't something I'd likely do. On the other hand, I'm not trying to keep guns a secret from my wife or pals at the gun club.

 

[Moe Mentum]

Gun ? what gun, that's a cell phone ....

 

[Ogandydancer]

There are very few people that know I carry. Most of the people at my church know as most of them are also CPL holders and gun enthusiast's themselves. Other than that I just don't tell. Concealed is concealed and that means no one but me needs to know. Besides, as far as I am concerned it's nobody's business but mine.

 

[vito]

Anyone who knows me also knows that I am a strong 2nd Amendment supporter and political conservative. But to strangers I am just an old, somewhat overweight white haired guy going about his business. None of my family are particularly pro-gun and my grown children and their spouses are generally anti-carry out of concern that an accident could occur which would cause harm to their children (my grandchildren that I love dearly). So I carry quietly. My wife knows I am licensed and that I carry, but I do not make a show of it. I discreetly holster my gun or slip it into a pocket before leaving the house so that she never even thinks about it. Other than at my pistol club's indoor ranges do I ever discuss concealed carry.

But as to guns being just a "thing", like socks or laundry detergent, I strongly disagree. Guns are, in reality, the great equalizer as Sam Colt long ago stated. A gun gives me more of a chance to avoid being victimized by the young, strong and ruthless than I would be if unarmed. But a gun is also a great responsibility. You cannot make much of a mistake regarding socks, but you sure can accidentally cause mayhem if you are careless with a gun and how you handle it. I never wear gun-related clothing, or have any gun-related things on my vehicles, other than a discreet interior decal on one of my cars which shows me as an NRA Life Member (which I probably will remove shortly). A gun doesn't make me a super hero, an almost LEO, or a Jason Bourne, but it does give me a sense of personal and family security that I would not have without a firearm.

 

[Brian41]

My carrying is something I keep low key as others have said it's nobody else's business. A few in my family know as well as a few friends but all are gun supporters themselves.
When I was working I had gun rights discussions with some co-workers but never volunteered I had a carry permit. Others that knew me better knew I owned guns and carried but those were also gun owners and a couple I convinced to get their permits.
I don't volunteer much information to those I don't know. I did tell the lady that works at a store I go to that I have a permit. That was after I saw she open carried a Glock and commended her for that. She now carries concealed and maybe in reaction to some of her customers I don't know. She's the only person I've told I have a permit I didn't know well.