You know you are a mall ninja when ...

[Charlie Foxtrott]

You might be a mall Ninja.

When you claim to be a personal friend of Gecko 45. But you really are not supposed to talk about it.

 

[Jay_Crown]

When you claim to have been a member of the Seals, but you can't talk about it....

Also -

When you sport a "Special Forces" sign on your car, I spotted this earlier today, be advised the individual driving the vehicle was no less then 300lbs.

 

[KEN L]

You might be a mall ninja if you......................ummmm, I forget.

Sorry, too much medical marijuana!

 

[nquinto2]

when your pantry is full of this

All I need now are some tacti-cakes!!

 

[Scopes]

All I need now are some tacti-cakes!!

I'm starting to approve of a lot of these pictures. It may be time to take a break for some self-reflection.

 

[Riccur]

My neighbor in Texas had a Lab named Winston. He always wore camo clothing, often mixing (green/blk with Desert, etc),


Where did they get all the dog camo???

 

[compshootfl]

When you DON'T know you are a mall ninja.

 

[roadkill45]

you know you are one if this is your main picture in your house:

and this is you for your FB profile:

 

[OldEagleEars]

You might be a Mall-Ninja if you:
a. refer to your yard as your "Area of Operations"
b. insist that your family refer to you as "Six-actual"
c. have fifty-seven cases of Beenie-Weenies buried in air-tight canisters in your backyard
d. you forgot which pocket you put your throwing stars in and suffered a severe laceration of your own *** when you sat down
e. have actually priced what it would cost to paint your house in a Realtree camo pattern
f. have at least one knife that you can't open without cutting yourself
g. use the military phonetic alphabet to spell dirty words in front of your children
h. still have money in a fund you started to save up for a Hummer H-1
i. have made your wife pee herself by jumping out from behind the couch with an AR to surprise her
j. have at least one neighbor that you think needs to be "survailed"
k. have a gun safe that is bigger than your youngest child's room
l. have ever spoken of your fear during "long jungle nights in 'Nam" even though you weren't born until the war was over for six years
m. practice bayonet drills in front of your bathroom mirror
n. have a complete collection of "Soldier of Fortune" magazine back-issues in a filing cabinet within reach of your toilet
o. know the ballistic characteristics of the .308 Lapua by heart but can't remember when your wedding anniversary is
p. secretly enjoy going "commando" to PTA meetings
q. have "Punisher" grips on your air-soft 1911
r. often scan the sky looking for drones looking for you
s. never use your turn-signals so "they" won't know where you're going
t. refer to spending six hours playing "Halo" as a "training session"
u. habitually use the word "over" during cellphone conversations
v. carry a rifle when you take your trash to the curb after dark
w. tell strangers at parties what kind of gun you think they should own
x. don't know what a "fire-mission" is but thinks it really sounds cool!
y. have ever wondered if you could buy camouflaged socks
z. often wonder what it's like to really be shot at with real bullets!

 

[Bamabred]

You may be a mall ninja if you have iron sights, a 3x12 scope, and a red dot sight on your M&P 15-22 at the same time.

 

[roadkill45]

"n. have a complete collection of "Soldier of Fortune" magazine back-issues in a filing cabinet within reach of your toilet"

Now i would LOVE to have all those old back issues when they were actively searching for mercs in the classifieds! Classic!

I got given a couple of recent copies and all the articles were about the old issues!!!!

Here's one: You always say 'Roger' or 'Check' when acknowledging someone, my ex SIL who actually completed 3 weeks of Basic and calls himself a Veteran.

 

[Culina]

you know you are a mall ninja when you have your Ruger 1022 tricked out to look like an MG42 or M60 SAW and you act like that's what it is

 

[bp231986]

You know you are a mall ninja when:

When you have a back up gun for your back up gun to your back up gun...

 

[shouldazagged]

when your pantry is full of this

Reminds me of the time I was returning from fishing, stopped at a little country store, and found cans of cola called "Whoopa**".

Bought a couple as gag gifts for my son and brother.

 

[roadkill45]

what about "Billy Beer"? Still have a full case unopened!!! Right next to the Tactical Bacon and the dehydrated milk!!

 

[nicky4968]

When you speak disparagingly of revolvers as "wheel guns."

 

[DavidC]

When you speak disparagingly of revolvers as "wheel guns."

Ahh yes, "wheel Guns" and "Bottom Feeders" (semi autos)

 

[roadkill45]

When you speak disparagingly of revolvers as "wheel guns."

Dang, i'm a MALL NINJA! But not disparagingly, just a phrase i learned from Granddad and have used ever since.

Don't use the "bottom feeder" but that's a good one!

 

[nscshwn08]

When my 5.5lb rifle now weighs 22.3lbs empty....wait, did I say "my", meant "your"..........

 

[Charlie Foxtrott]

You might be a Mall Ninja.

When you blouse your camo pants into your boots and wear a beret even if you have never been in the armed forces.