Blonde joke

bubbiesdad

Member
Joined
May 2, 2008
Messages
719
Reaction score
145
Location
East TN
Two blondes were sipping their Starbucks when a truck
went past loaded up with rolls of sod.
"I'm going to do that when I win the lottery," announced Blonde #1. "Do what?" asked Blonde #2.
"Send my lawn out to be mowed."
 
Register to hide this ad
The pretty young thing was having computer trouble at work so I.T. came in to fix it.

She was asked for her password and she replied: "Mickey Minnie Pluto Huey Duey Luey Dopey Doc Sacramento"

"Wow, why is your password so long?"

"I was told it had to have eight characters and a capitol!"
 
{ Joke has been modified to keep it Family Friendly :D }


Soon after the final settlement of my recent divorce, I met this incredibly beautiful blonde woman. After a nice afternoon of coffee and small talk we went to a movie. After the movie I took the long way home, and somehow? wound up in a secluded area on a romatic clearing overlooking the ocean. We started making out and things began to get a little hot and heavy. The car having a floor stick shift and bucket seats was really cramping my style. Being the gentleman that I am I asked blondie if she wanted to go into the back seat.


She, thought for a minute and said, " no I want to stay up here with you ".
 
Dolly Parton was once asked if she was offended by dumb blonde jokes.

She replied, 'Of course not. For one thing, I know I'm not dumb. And for another, I know I'm not blonde.'
 
Mrs Rule is Blonde so I have pretty much all of them. She gave me permission;) Some I can not tell here. Blonde Star is my favorite. I think it was from the "original" SNL. When the show was actually funny.

Of course there is :

A blonde and a brunette both jumped off a 20 story building. Which one hit the ground first??

The brunette. The Blonde stopped to ask for directions!

Bada Bing!, Yes I will be here all week!:eek:
 
A blonde was going door to door looking for odd jobs to make money. She rang a doorbell and asked if they had any work she could do. The homeowner said he had just bought the paint and if she wanted, she could paint the porch for him. Two hours later, the blonde rings the doorbell again and tells the homeowner she was through. As he was looking around noticing nothing had been painted, the blonde said, "Oh, by the way, that's a Ferrari, not a Porsche."
 
[FONT=times new roman,helvetica]A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"

In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something."

Our bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"

The blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
[/FONT]
 
Two blondes were in a pickup truck that went over the side of a bridge and landed right side up in a river -- unfortunately, both of the blondes drowned as the truck slowly sank -- they could not figure out how to get the tailgate down.:D
 
The blond gets an irate call from a collection agency. The fellow tells her she ordered new windows for her house a year ago and hasn't made even one payment. "Helloooo" the blond says. "Your salesman told me that these windows would pay for themselves in one year. I don't owe you anything." There was silence on the other end of the phone.
 
The blonde calls 911 and frantically tells them "Come quick, my house is on fire." The dispatcher says "How do we get there?" to which the blonde replies "Don't y'all still have that big red truck?"
 
Back
Top