You're the pirate everyone else wants to throw in the ocean -- not to get rid of you, you understand; just to get rid of the smell. Even though you're not always the traditional swaggering gallant, your steadiness and planning make you a fine, reliable pirate. Arr!
Like anyone confronted with the harshness of robbery on the high seas, you can be pessimistic at times. Like the rock flint, you're hard and sharp. But, also like flint, you're easily chipped, and sparky. Arr!
"Cajunlawyer" Why, that pirate name sends shivers down the spines of coastal dwelling peoples all along the gulf. Oh wait, that's taken. "Iron Jack Roberts" will have to do.