Define Old

[dasnake]

For me.......

Platform shoes, straight leg seafarers with two inch cuffs and a paisley shirt.

 

[Frank46]

I used to tell my wife that I was born old. And tomorrow I go out to prove it. I'll be 75 the 10th of October this year. Didn't get the usual renew notice for my drivers license this year. Which means that you have to show up in person. Most likely get the eye test, make sure vehicle registration and insurance is current. Has cataract eye surgery last year so maybe I can ask them if they would let me take the eye test two ways. One with the glasses and the other without just to see how good the relined eyeballs work. And then either hamburgers or fish to celebrate. Or Chicken if things done work out as expected. Frank

 

[Breakaway500]

Old. When I do something I know will be for the last time in my life..that's old.

When I buy something and know it will outlive me..that's old.

 

[Cdog]

Old is when you pay dearly for doing everyday things.

Old is when women in their 40’s say “ you sound just like my Dad.”

Old is when you start questioning why it is you didn’t notice that beautiful woman across the aisle.

I would continue, but I need a restroom break…

 

[pittpa]

You are invisible to women under 40 unless they are your child or grandchild.
Other old people who are strangers acknowledge you and greet you.
Somebody calls you pop. That happened to me for the first time this week. The guy was like 40.


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[VaTom]

Old is playing off the senior tees and bragging about your score. Taking a two hour nap in the afternoon and still going to bed before 10 pm. Reading the real newspaper each morning- not the electronic version.

 

[Grayfox]

I remember very well the first time a felt old. I was about 50 at the time. I was having a conversation with a rather attractive young lady. When it was over, she said "Have a nice day SIR! "
Ouch! That hurt!

 

[Toolguy]

Old is 10 or more years older than your current age. Young is 10 or more years younger than your current age.

 

[jeffrefrig]

Rusty, I almost blew coffee outta my nose! We've done so many variations of that trick every place I ever worked. I put some heat conductant paste on a guy's tool bucket rim, as he always used it to sit on while working on rooftop HVAC units. (It's like Neversieze only it's white instead of silver or copper. One drop of it covers two miles, I swear.)
Yeah, I do believe the definition of OLD changes every 3 years.

 

[Truckman]

Old is when you read through all these posts and find one for which you have a clever reply, then finish reading to the bottom, and can no longer find the one to which you wanted to reply...

And you forgot what you were going to say anyhow......Ben

 

[mmb617]

My 2 friends and I have been going on a yearly fishing trip to Maine for about 30 years. A couple years ago one of my friends said, Do you remember those 4 old guys that stayed in the next cabin when we first started coming here, we are them now!

Similar story. When we moved into our house 42 years ago we were a young couple in a neighborhood composed almost entirely of retired folks. There were a few clashes over our vastly different lifestyles but they got worked out eventually.

I still live in that same house but now I'm the neighborhood old fart, just about everybody else is much younger. I never complain when my neighbors have a loud party as I can remember hosting a few of those myself back in the day. I get along with all those younger people and don't want to be the grouchy old guy.

 

[Salty RI]

If you remember all of these, you are old.

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[JBTrucker]

Definition of old depends on how young you are . Back around 2001 41 years old was driving my Red Toyota 4X4 when two young girls pulled up along side . Girl in passenger seat looked disappointed, read her lips oh he's an old guy.

 

[Ivan the Butcher]

Old. When I do something I know will be for the last time in my life..that's old.

That's true for everything but going to work. The final day of work is like the start of a continuous party!

Ivan

 

[s&wchad]

I realized I was getting old about 30 years ago.

A coworker and I were on a business trip in Ohio and we stopped into a bar for a drink after dinner. A cute young gal walked up to the bar right next to where I was sitting, ordered a drink and gave me a great big smile!

Then she said I look just like her dad.

 

[Rolex28]

It's not the years left in your life , it's the life left in your years.....

 

[Rustyt1953]

When I die, I'm gonna have a magician saw me in half to count the rings just to get the marker right.

 

[Golddollar]

That's true for everything but going to work. The final day of work is like the start of a continuous party!

Ivan

You bet. People get a good laugh when I tell then I retired on December 31, 2015 at 3:30 PM. That last day I made sure to check my watch when I started the car to leave the office for the last time because I wanted to savor the moment.

 

[MTC(SS)Ret]

Old is when you go out to a restaurant to eat dinner and they automatically give you the senior citizen discount.

 

[SteveA]

My Dad is 95 now. He deer hunted through his 92nd year. Not sitting in some fancy stand either but still hunting, getting on the draws and watching timber. Drove me crazy because he'd never stay in one place. He gave it up because my mother couldn't be left alone. Physically healthy but she has dementia. My sister moved in with them last winter. I asked him the other day if he wanted to go out this fall. He's considering it. He always says your only as old as you let yourself think you are, and he's never gotten past 18.

 

[Chubbo]

Old

I've contemplated, my first list. This is my revised, more complete list.
I’ve read you folks’, question, of the definition of old.
Here’s mine;
Can’t drive, cars, Ride, motorcycles, or motor scooters.
Have to depend on others for your every need.
Dread hearing what a burden you are.
Don’t have any passionate likes, or dislikes.
Have few remaining friends, or foes.
Are Proclaimed cynical, and pessimistic by all.
Can’t conform to today’s standards.
Can’t make today’s electronic devices operate.
Don’t sleep or rest.
Enjoy little food.’
Enjoy little Kickapoojoyjuice.
Don’t enjoy your knife, gun, antique, or other collections.
No longer savor your memories.
No longer want to create new friendships. Or to maintain old ones.
Survived two separate fights with cancer.
Pain in every part of my body most of the time.
Constant, loosing fight with my hearing aids.
Eyesight can't be corrected properly.
Remain habitually weak, and by necessity inactive.
Crave the hereafter.

 

[hivel37]

The first time I felt old was 65th birthday.
That was 19 years ago. Since then I just take my
days one at a time. Works pretty good.

 

[Old cop]

When I was a young newlywed, I remember having Thanksgiving dinner at my wife's grandparent's house. Her step-Grandmother was talking about an acquaintance in Springfield who had recently died. She said, "she was a young woman - only 74." I thought it was funny at the time, but now I have reached an age where I understand what she was saying.

I’ll be 75 in November, do not consider myself young by any stretch, but do hope to live long enough to echo those same sentiments about someone.

 

[HOUSTON RICK]

Old has always been the same number for me. My age +30 years.

 

[Golddollar]

In the immortal words of the great Fred G. Sanford, "It's better to be a dirty old man than a dead old man!

 

[crazyphil]

Three guys sitting on a park bench.
1st guy says windy isn't it.
2nd guy says no I think it's Thursday.
3rd guy says I am too, let's go get a drink.
They are as old as the joke.

 

[Old 44 Guy]

I remember my 50th. My wife teased me saying I was half a century old, that was over 40 years back.

 

[RangerRRP]

Growing “old” is a mind set. I graduated from U.S. Army Ranger School at age 30. My closest Brother and friend, a Special Forces Colonel, pulled me out of my retirement for another tour of Active Duty. He told me I was like a 35 year old Team guy. Work out hard, play hard, drive fast, keep jumping out of perfectly good airplanes, go to the range and keep up your shooting skills and ALWAYS remember tactics and safety!


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[crazyphil]

I kinda remember when I was about 72, my doctor was talking about me
to someone on the phone. He said he is a young 72. That was 14 years
ago.

I also remember asking a young lady where she had been all my live.
She said for most of it I wasn't even born yet.

 

[7tenz]

One thing I noticed way before my 68th year is I only laugh at things that are actually funny. Guess that makes me an old grump.