''The coldest winter I ever spent, was a summer in San Francisco'' AND " It's a shame youth is wasted on the young " I do believe those belong to Mark Twain
Another couple of Winston Churchill quotes:
Lady Astor: "Winston, if I were married to you I would put poison in your coffee."
Winston: "Lady Astor, if I were married to you, I would drink it."
and,
Lady Astor: "Winston, you don't even know how many toes a pig has."
"Lady Astor, I must confess that I don't know how many toes a pig has. Take off your little shoes and let's have a look."
plus, my favorite:
"Ending a sentence with a preposition is an abomination, up with which, I will not put."