How to get my gun shy gf to shoot?

[DeadWhiteGoose]

So, here's the scoop. My girl friend and I have been together for almost a year now. She's a pretty outgoing girl, not you're average ditsy bimbo by any means. She camps, hikes, collects knives and even practices archery. BUT, because of her crazy dad and living in a rough area growing up, she has a bad connotation with guns. She's basically afraid of them. She feels like she'd have a panic attack if she were around a bunch of guns going off ie; going to the range. I've gotten her to hold a couple of my guns and she's even looked through my scopes and such. She'll even take me to gun stores and let me look around. And I still can't convince her to shoot! I think I might be able to take her out just the two of us and shoot my 10/22 and just maybe convince her to take a shot. I know once she pulls that trigger she'll love it! She shoots bows and arrows for Christ sake. It's the natural progression. Any ideas on how I could make her more comfortable around firearms or shooting? I'd really like to involve her in something I love to do and that I know she'd love to do once she did it.

 

[ordy]

That's a tough one. My wife is the same way...not anti, just afraid. I explained that I wanted her to at least learn how to fire the gun so she wouldn't be defenseless at home. I took her to the range early on a day most peole were at work and luckily, we had the place to ourselves. We started with a model 17 so there wasn't a lot of noise and virtually no recoil. She was obviously nervous but got through it. We graduated to the model 64 (nightstand gun) and she did okay with that too. By the end of the hour, she was able to put six rounds center mass on a silouette target at seven yards. I was proud that she worked through her fear and made sure she knew it.

 

[gunfish]

I don't push folks to shoot. Things go better when people make the decision on their own. I have given guns to friends as gifts but I don't pressure them to enjoy it my way. I let them enjoy it their way which may mean shooting less or more then I. Give her a rifle of her own but don't press for results, if she does not shoot it then that is fine but do not shoot it your self. Have you considered archery on your part as a way to out flank her thoughts about firearms?

This indirect approach lets folks arrive at the decision on their own. If you enjoy doing her things, she may enjoy trying your things. Above all do not apply direct pressure and don't get out of shape if she does not shoot.

 

[DeadWhiteGoose]

Ya I definitely partake in archery with her. I don't get upset or anything with her and haven't pushed it too much either. That's why I figured I'd ask for some advice before I tried anything. Good tips! And ya a lot of it is me wanting her to be able to defend herself or anyone else if something was to happen. She is one of those "I'm sure if I had to" types but it's hard to explain to a non gun user that you honestly can't just pick up any gun and use it. It's almost more dangerous to yourself and those around you if you do. Haven't really tried to explain that yet, not really trying for the "I'm smarter than you" approach. I doubt that'd help anything.

 

[jaykellogg]

You could try a CO2 pistol or perhaps an air rifle. This you could shoot by yourselves without going to a shooting range.

Another option would be for her to take a ladies only begining shooting class.

 

[ELDORA]

Get her to attend a NRA Women on Target if you can. Some friends of mine & I who are certified instructors volunteer twice a year at our local events. It's a blast....for us and the ladies, too! We're very careful about safety and making sure everyone has a good experience. I can't remember EVER having a lady not try the biggest, baddest caliber on the table before the day is over. We start with .22's, though, even the experienced shooters. This might help you "break the ice". Be patient!

 

[Duke426]

You could try a CO2 pistol or perhaps an air rifle. This you could shoot by yourselves without going to a shooting range.

Another option would be for her to take a ladies only begining shooting class.

I think this is good advice. See if she would like to attend a ladies only class near you. Maybe you have a friend who has a girlfriend/wife she could go with. Whatever you do, don't push the guns/shooting on her or she may go the other way on you.

 

[Arik]

Maybe start with something that doesnt look like RoboCop or Rambo would carry.

An air gun or a bolt/lever 22. Even a 10/22, but semi's are more aggressive. Maybe a pink 22!

Or, while she's sleeping, carefully and quietly tape a gun to her hand (empty and without a mag) so when she wakes up she already holding a gun and the world did end!

Sent from my DROIDX using Tapatalk 2

 

[brucev]

Re: OP. Ditsy bimbo? Such characterizations are as uncalled for as the supposition that gun owners are frightened rednecks.

Your girlfriend sounds like a fine person, outgoing, enjoying the outdoors, all activities that you appear to also enjoy. She does not enjoy firearms, which from her experience do not bear pleasant connotations. That is entirely understandable. She accommodates your interest in firearms. That is very gracious on her part.

It is unreasonable to expect that everyone will like equally everything, regardless of if they are just acquaintances, good friends, dating or even married. There are lots of folks who share common interest yet find there are some things such as sports, books, hobbies, etc., where those interest diverge. It is normal. If she were an avid knitter, you would not likely well receive efforts to get you to pick up needles and yarn and embrace the hobby.

That she enjoys archery is good. Some of the finest informal and match archers are women. To suppose that there is a natural progression from archery to firearms is a fallacious assumption that reflect more your own preference rather than reality.

Over the long term you may see your girl friend change her opinion. Putting pressure on her to embrace with enthusiasm your interest in firearms/shooting is just about guaranteed to result not only in failure but stress on your relationship that is not productive. If firearms/shooting is an overwhelmingly central interest in your life, then you and your girl friend will need to think about how you want to proceed with your relationship. It is not unlike choices that must be made regarding education, career, family, children, etc. One has to learn the art of give and take, i.e., how to give more than you take, and how to take more than you give.

 

[JJEH]

Great advice here. Show her what you've got, so she knows what is around. Don't force her do do anything she doesn't want, don't even get upset (also try to control the non verbal signs... yes, the ones that get us in trouble all the time )

Take just "you and her" time, so try to go to a range were it's just you and her, not a bunch of people. Tell her how firearms work,try to make your excitement available for her. Also, tell her all pros and cons about firearms, don't lie. Yes, we have murders and yes we also have stupid gunowners. But that's not you and that's not her.

Also, firearms are tools. You have to know how to handle it correctly and safely. Not more no less. Otherwise she should also be afraid of screwdrivers, hammers, and so on...

You might wanna start easy and always show interest in "why" she doesn't like it. Maybe one day you hear the one little thing that started all this fear... maybe a family member got hurt or killed. You never know...

Last thing I learned (took me awhile, but now I get it): You don't always have to agree on each other, but ou always should try to understand each other

Good luck

 

[ChattanoogaPhil]

Any ideas on how I could make her more comfortable around firearms or shooting?

Alone, outdoors, suppressed .22 = Girlfriend with big smile.

 

[Road Rat]

IF you get her to play with a nice 22 semi-auto shooting at cans....the fun part of plinking....be sure she is wearing a good set of ear muffs!!!

For some people the noise is the big turnoff.

Good luck with the great lady friend.

 

[AirForceShooter]

Get one of her girl friends that's shoots to get her involved

AFS

 

[old bear]

Deadwhitegoose, You've received some excellent advise so far. The only thing I will add is don't try and force your lady friend in to shooting. If she is willing to try it be supportive yet don't be upset if she decides shooting is not for her.

 

[carpriver]

Most every one has let her make the decison to shoot. Here where I live the have a program called Wilderness Women. it is a orginized program that getting women outdoors and teaches them archery, shooting, snowshoeing outdor fire building. Women come away with new intrests and new friends. Cherck oyur ares and see if there might be a program like that.THis program is taught by women for women.

 

[DWalt]

Having been there, what worked for me is starting out in the back yard with a Daisy BB gun. Then go from there. Works on kids too. I started my granddaughter and stepson that way.

 

[A10]

I'd vote for the BB gun and some aluminum cans as well. It's how I started, and reactive targets are a lot more rewarding than punching paper. Just go out and set up some targets, then plink a little yourself. When she comes out to see what's going on offer her a shot. Be patient, she may not want to right away. A little competition set up with a friend there may help too, appealing to her competitive nature.

 

[RKBAGUY]

Any ideas on how I could make her more comfortable around firearms or shooting?

Psychological warfare.

1. Introduce her to women among your family, friends and neighbors who own and shoot guns. Having peers (non-male shooters) will help her feel more comfortable with the idea. If she knows there are other gals involved, she will probably want to join in.
2. Find a Women On Target event in your area, and ask her to go and observe. Give her space to make her own friends. When she latches on to someone, step away and go have a cup of coffee. Don't make it an opportunity to talk about your collection or what you like (other than maybe getting the conversation started), let her make it about her. Refer to post #1.
3. Find a Single Action Shooting Society event in your area. (It's all about accessorizing, 'ya know!). Different kinds of sport shooting appeal to different interests. Refer to post #2.
4. Acquaint her with Second Amendment Sisters when the time is right or all else has failed. Knowing that there are things worse than a gun that go bump in the night can be a bigger fear that overcomes the little fear.

 

[venomballistics]

thats easy ... place a loaded gun where she can find it than sell her shoes on Ebay .. she'll take up shooting right quick.

 

[sipowicz]

Tell her you've been cheating on her with her best friend.