David LaPell
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- Joined
- Mar 9, 2008
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I haven't been able to do as much as I wished to, firearms or otherwise, mostly because there's been so much family drama, and just when I think it's over, the dial gets ramped up from mildly insane to lunatic.
Last March, my sister passed away. She had cancer but she also had been putting into her system every type of drug, alcohol, etc. since she was 15. The only time it stopped was when she was in jail in the 90's. She was living in the south on a fugitive from justice warrant, and the rest of the family seemed to be in denial. I had broken off all contact with her and her 30 year old son because it had gotten so toxic that it was threatening my family here because she had threatened to call CPS on us for fake statements, accused me of crimes 10 plus years back, and did the same to everyone on facebook and elsewhere she disagreed with.
After a car accident where she was at fault that nearly killed her, which happened right after her and her son had a knock down, drag out fight on their lawn to the point he even got sick of her and left, her cancer was discovered and my mother decided to bring her back here to NY, unbeknownst to me because she was afraid I would turn her in. I was begged to make amends, and I did agree to see her, only to hear how crooked cops are, how she was never guilty of what she did, etc. That's how our last conversation went, and like she had done so much in the past, she conned everyone who met her into thinking she was a saint and her memorial service turned into what can be best described as a 3 ring circus. But besides myself and my mother, no family showed, the same with her burial except for my aunt who tried to actually pack up early and leave.
Now to current events, my mother has decided to pack up my 30 year old nephew and bring him here to NY, which has already turned into a disaster. During the summer my wife and I let our son go with my mother just to help out since he's a teenager now, and every trip turned into a visit to the cemetery to see my sister's headstone. Every, single trip. Recently my mother has been trying to push my wife's buttons to get her angry and my wife has been doing her very best, and to her credit, handling it better than I would had I seen or heard these things when they happened.
My Mom's latest was that we got an ice storm on Christmas day and my wife called her to warn her & that maybe put things off to the next day, to which my mother threw an epic temper tantrum. Things later worked out, but it left me feeling like the parent instead of the child.
I also had to tell my mother that my son would be very busy from now on for the next couple months with sports on the weekends. She apparently ignored me because a day or so later, she told me she wants to take him back to the cemetery where my sister is, on a day I told her he had sports for most of the day.
Now that she's bringing my nephew home from where he lived, I can't see his future being anything but boredom as she works 5 days a week and he doesn't drive, but it appears she already wants to dump him on us. She also lied to him by saying all of his guns had to be sold because none were NY compliant. When he called me I told him only 3 of his guns weren't compliant and the rest, of which he has many, were fine. She didn't speak to me for a week after that.
He's already asked me to reblue one of his guns, something I don't do and he's already said about coming up and going to the range, to which I replied he needs to be a member, per their rules. Yesterday he called the house a whole bunch of times while I was out, my wife finally answered because he will call again and again until someone talks to him. Again, he's 30, but he was babied his whole life. He said he's going to give my son a gaming computer, to which I already had to tell him no because we try to keep our son off the computer since he's on it at school during the day.
It looks to me like my mother, who at my son's birthday party announced she wants to move to the same town we live in, wants to eventually have my wife and I take care of my nephew, something we don't have room for. This is because my sister asked me to take care of him when I last saw her, something I already said was not possible, we don't have the room, he's 30, been kicked out by his latest girlfriend from her place because he told her what to do one too many times, etc.
Last night when I finally talked to him, I said something to him and he referred to my mother and her boyfriend, who I barely see, as my "parents". That was a line crossed and I corrected him about it while on speaker phone so it won't come up again. (My mother was trying to get my son to call him "Grandpa" after only seeing him once or twice). My mother later called back and while I was thinking she was trying to start a lecture, she instead was complaining about the FFL transfer fees for all the guns to be sent here and if I could find a cheaper place. I told her to break out a phone book.
I can see that this is going to be a potential disaster in the making as there have been times in the past when my wife and i go somewhere with my son, my mother has had meltdowns for not taking her, even when it was not possible because of her schedule, adding hours to the drive just to get her, or simply because it's stuff in my life I know she's not at all interested in. Now I have a feeling when we do things this year, we're going to get that she or my nephew would have liked to go, etc. Or she's going to try to come up all the time because she's had a history of showing up unannounced and not bothered to ask what we're doing because she apparently thinks we're home drooling on each other. As I have told my wife, if it weren't for my son, I most likely wouldn't even be having any contact with her because of all these past issues, but I think that day may be coming soon.
Sorry for the long rant, but it's either type this out or find a liquor store that opens really early in the am.
Last March, my sister passed away. She had cancer but she also had been putting into her system every type of drug, alcohol, etc. since she was 15. The only time it stopped was when she was in jail in the 90's. She was living in the south on a fugitive from justice warrant, and the rest of the family seemed to be in denial. I had broken off all contact with her and her 30 year old son because it had gotten so toxic that it was threatening my family here because she had threatened to call CPS on us for fake statements, accused me of crimes 10 plus years back, and did the same to everyone on facebook and elsewhere she disagreed with.
After a car accident where she was at fault that nearly killed her, which happened right after her and her son had a knock down, drag out fight on their lawn to the point he even got sick of her and left, her cancer was discovered and my mother decided to bring her back here to NY, unbeknownst to me because she was afraid I would turn her in. I was begged to make amends, and I did agree to see her, only to hear how crooked cops are, how she was never guilty of what she did, etc. That's how our last conversation went, and like she had done so much in the past, she conned everyone who met her into thinking she was a saint and her memorial service turned into what can be best described as a 3 ring circus. But besides myself and my mother, no family showed, the same with her burial except for my aunt who tried to actually pack up early and leave.
Now to current events, my mother has decided to pack up my 30 year old nephew and bring him here to NY, which has already turned into a disaster. During the summer my wife and I let our son go with my mother just to help out since he's a teenager now, and every trip turned into a visit to the cemetery to see my sister's headstone. Every, single trip. Recently my mother has been trying to push my wife's buttons to get her angry and my wife has been doing her very best, and to her credit, handling it better than I would had I seen or heard these things when they happened.
My Mom's latest was that we got an ice storm on Christmas day and my wife called her to warn her & that maybe put things off to the next day, to which my mother threw an epic temper tantrum. Things later worked out, but it left me feeling like the parent instead of the child.
I also had to tell my mother that my son would be very busy from now on for the next couple months with sports on the weekends. She apparently ignored me because a day or so later, she told me she wants to take him back to the cemetery where my sister is, on a day I told her he had sports for most of the day.
Now that she's bringing my nephew home from where he lived, I can't see his future being anything but boredom as she works 5 days a week and he doesn't drive, but it appears she already wants to dump him on us. She also lied to him by saying all of his guns had to be sold because none were NY compliant. When he called me I told him only 3 of his guns weren't compliant and the rest, of which he has many, were fine. She didn't speak to me for a week after that.
He's already asked me to reblue one of his guns, something I don't do and he's already said about coming up and going to the range, to which I replied he needs to be a member, per their rules. Yesterday he called the house a whole bunch of times while I was out, my wife finally answered because he will call again and again until someone talks to him. Again, he's 30, but he was babied his whole life. He said he's going to give my son a gaming computer, to which I already had to tell him no because we try to keep our son off the computer since he's on it at school during the day.
It looks to me like my mother, who at my son's birthday party announced she wants to move to the same town we live in, wants to eventually have my wife and I take care of my nephew, something we don't have room for. This is because my sister asked me to take care of him when I last saw her, something I already said was not possible, we don't have the room, he's 30, been kicked out by his latest girlfriend from her place because he told her what to do one too many times, etc.
Last night when I finally talked to him, I said something to him and he referred to my mother and her boyfriend, who I barely see, as my "parents". That was a line crossed and I corrected him about it while on speaker phone so it won't come up again. (My mother was trying to get my son to call him "Grandpa" after only seeing him once or twice). My mother later called back and while I was thinking she was trying to start a lecture, she instead was complaining about the FFL transfer fees for all the guns to be sent here and if I could find a cheaper place. I told her to break out a phone book.
I can see that this is going to be a potential disaster in the making as there have been times in the past when my wife and i go somewhere with my son, my mother has had meltdowns for not taking her, even when it was not possible because of her schedule, adding hours to the drive just to get her, or simply because it's stuff in my life I know she's not at all interested in. Now I have a feeling when we do things this year, we're going to get that she or my nephew would have liked to go, etc. Or she's going to try to come up all the time because she's had a history of showing up unannounced and not bothered to ask what we're doing because she apparently thinks we're home drooling on each other. As I have told my wife, if it weren't for my son, I most likely wouldn't even be having any contact with her because of all these past issues, but I think that day may be coming soon.
Sorry for the long rant, but it's either type this out or find a liquor store that opens really early in the am.
