Stupid Things Uttered by Auto Parts Store Workers

[WR Moore]

While I've experienced many of the things described here, I don't see one of my pet peeves: just in time parts stock. That is, unless it's parts used almost daily, they have to be ordered. This gets interesting when either the wrong parts are ordered or there's a situation where the manufacturer used several different parts and you have to figure out exactly which one (like Honda the years they used something like 7 possible distributor caps).

You also have the cases where production changes were made and parts makers may not include gaskets where they've been made reusable. Of course, they're often not stocked either. I recall asking Advance where my gasket was ('96 F250, E4OD tranny): "You reuse it, sir." "Not in 1996, kid. I need a gasket!" "Ah, we can have it for you tomorrow, maybe." "Doesn't do me any good today, does it?" Like another gent noted, NAPA several hundred yards away solved my problem-and their filter had the correct parts numbers.

Come to think of it, the parts books frequently don't keep necessary information for older vehicles in place after design changes either.

 

[tacreload]

Sorry but one last comment.I won't be "Fetchin" anything for you.Have a splendid day.

 

[BuckeyeChuck]

So according to Chuck,farmers can't cook what they grow.Mechanics can't do math.So if you can't excel in one you can't excel in the other.

I never wrote anything remotely close to this. Please reread both your post and mine. You said this:

I have a belief that if you design it you should be able to fix it.

This statement says that you think that a designer should be *required* to also know how to fix what he designs. My objection is to your mandate, not to the idea that people can excel at multiple skill sets.

This is pretty scary thinking. Skilled in one area and not in another? This type of thinking is exactly the reason this country is in the shape that it is in.
So you are telling me that if I design it I don't have to to fix it?

Ridiculous cause-and-effect fallacy about our country's problems notwithstanding, YES, this is exactly what I'm telling you. As for ungrounded phobias, yours may be easily dispelled by a simple examination of your own life.

Can you draw blood? Run a lab test? Interpret the results relative to quantitative norms? Take a patient history? Turn symptoms into a diagnosis of cause based on anatomy, physiology, and biochemistry? Prescribe a course of treatment knowing the chemical effects and side effects of drugs? Cut flesh to repair it?

No? Then I suppose you use doctors, nurses, phlebotomists, lab technicians, drug researchers, and pharmacists. Scary that you can't do it yourself.

Can you fly an airplane? Design its engines? Repair its airframe? Fill it with fuel? Drain its lavs?

No? Then I suppose you use pilots, aerospace engineers, A&P mechanics, and ground service airport workers when you want to fly somewhere. Scary that you can't do it yourself.

I'm guessing based on your participation in this forum that you own and shoot at least one Smith & Wesson. Can you design the gun? Manufacture the gun? Navigate the bazillion rules and regulations to which a gun manufacturer is increasingly subjected?

No? Then I suppose you rely on the engineers, accountants, lawyers, and factory workers at S&W. Scary that you can't do it yourself. Heck, you can't even make your own ammunition. You can buy the parts and the machine to assemble your own ammunition, but somebody else still has to make the parts and the machine.

I'm trying to illustrate absurdity with absurdity, of course. The idea that any man can be good at everything is unrealistic. Your notion that a man *must* be good at skill A as a requirement to also be good at skill B is simply ridiculous. Engineers don't need to be mechanics, just like mechanics don't need to be engineers.

If specialization frightens you, then I wonder if you sleep well at night, because your complete existence is dependent upon the deep skill of others. If there is a "problem with the country", it is not specialization of skill; it is a growing lack of skill. Companies today are complaining that they can't find people to fill positions. While this assertion is widely mocked by the unthinking ("Can't they see all the unemployed people?"), it is nonetheless true. It's not that companies can't find people; it's that they can't find people with the depth of specialized skill upon which our economy runs.

After 15 years on emailing lists and internet forums, I am *still* taken aback by the general lack of literacy and wholesale innumeracy I witness. These are just *basic* skills. Tack on detailed critical thought and a smidgen of imagination? Fuhgeddaboudit. That's when you get some guy at an auto parts store counter telling you that semi-metallic pads damage your car.

I don't have a college degree like you.

That's alright. College degrees are highly overrated in my opinion. Contrary to what they tell you, universities don't corner the market on learning, which is ultimately a personal activity where the amount of learning is directly proportional to the effort made by the individual.

I'm probably not as smart as you.

Maybe, maybe not. I've said nothing about your intelligence because your smarts (and mine) are irrelevant. I've only posted my opinion about your opinions.

You are surely part of the problem in this country.Don't mean to offend you.

I refuse to be offended by accusations lacking in detailed thought and/or that cannot withstand the minutest scrutiny. Furthermore, I try not to judge a fellow poster's character or productivity based on limited writings on a gun forum where we're chatting about auto parts store workers, since it isn't possible to know a man well in such circumstances.

You can still come to me for all of your parts needs.I'll be the guy with a smile on his face.Let me know if you come upon a problem that nobody else can solve,I may be able to figure it out.

You might! You may find what I'm about to write unbelievable (though what you believe about me is irrelevant) but I enjoy relying upon the skills of those around me to enhance my life. You do too; you just think it's a sign of weakness or something. I routinely call upon those who know things I don't to help me solve problems.

Six years ago I was repairing rear brakes on my 1995 Ford Focus. I couldn't get the drums back on the shoes, and it wasn't obvious to me why. Know what I did? I called a friend who is a professional mechanic. He came over, looked at it for a few minutes and told me exactly what the problem was. I'm skeptical that he could design a drum brake assembly that would be (a) easy to assemble, (b) cost-effective, and (c) performs according to braking energy and power specifications, but he sure knew how to fix the broken parts, and for that depth of skill I was grateful.

 

[Herknav]

A friend of mine put a Chevy 350 in an AMC J20 pickup. His radiator hose was about an inch too short. He went to one of the auto parts stores with his brand new Gates hose in hand. He told the guy he wanted another hose, only he wanted one an inch longer. The counter guy asked what it was off of. My friend said it didn't matter; he just needed one an inch longer. After a couple of times back and forth, my buddy gave in. When they got to "what size engine?" Sparky's clue light finally came on, as AMC offered a 360, but not a 350. He seized up, so my buddy asked for the Gates parts book, served himself, and lived happily ever after.

I will admit to having to go outside to look at my part to see what I needed. When working on a AMC Jeep, the first question they will ask you is, do you want the Motorcraft or the Delco? (Why couldn't they have done that with engines since they did it with everything else?) AMC is the worst on parts standardization and no, I can't just go to the dealership.

In other news, Willys has gone out of business as well.

 

[cougar14]

Several years ago, I bought a new battery from K-mart. I took it home, hooked it up, and immediately fried the entire electrical system. They had charged the battery backwards, Positive was Negative. I took the battery back, the guy at the counter called the parts manager. He checked the battery with a voltmeter, confirmed it was backward, and then said,"Are you sure you didn't hook it up backward?" I replied, "If I had, nothing would have happened." He just stood there for a second, digesting this profound statement, and referred me to their claims department for a full payment for all repairs.

 

[DeathGrip]

 

[617X10]

Been there, done that. It's hard to find an 81 Chevy pickup with a 267 small block, but I had one. Most counter guys realize that a small block is a small block as long as you're not asking for internal components. I do feel that for best results you should treat the person behind the counter like you would want to be treated. This should be the rule for anything from buying a cup of coffee and a newspaper at your local mini mart to finding a set of lefty tighty righty loosey lug nuts for your Dodge Omni. That kid may not know an oil filter from a carburetor, but at least the kid is behind a counter trying to earn some of his or her own money.

 

[J Rich]

I'm not bragging about being one of the "Shirts" or anything. I'm sure I've said a dumb thing or two I my short lived "Shirt" career. I'm sure I did give the deer in the headlights look when a customer came in and asked for spark plugs for his 350 and told me that the year model didn't matter.

I'm not a chevy guy. It's safe to say I bleed Ford blue. If a customer came in with a ford problem I was the guy. I've also heard some of my "Shirt" co-workers say some dumb junk. Now when I go to the parts stores I like to have the part # in hand. Sometimes I'm looking for a part for a project that's being "rigged" together and the "Shirt" is determined that he needs to know what it fits. All I want to do is go behind the counter to find what I'm looking for, but no the "Shirt" has to waste my time going back and forth bringing the wrong stuff.

Some of the dumbest and funniest stuff comes from the customer. One fine day a man comes in and says he needs a window regulator for his car. I asked the man "does it have power windows"? He replied "I don't know I just push the button and it goes up or down". Really? One woman was sure she had a 302 V8 under the hood of her Dodge mini van, and there was no telling her other wise even after I took her showed her the V6 that the factory installed. I could go on and on.

It doesn't take long to realize being a "shirt" that most the customers know more the you. They all have a degree in something. Most have no clue want size motor they have in their car/truck. They all need the part that sits on the "thingy" that connects to the "hicky" thats next to the "thing a ma jig" that plugs in to the "whatcha ma call it".

Dang kinda makes me miss being a "Shirt".

 

[steamloco76]

My first car when I was 18 years old was a 1977 Pontiac Grand Prix with a genuine Pontiac 400/6.6L engine and 400 THM transmission. The 1977 Grand Prix could have engines made by Buick, Olds or Pontiac under the hood, so the fifth digit of the VIN was needed for all engine parts. My car had the fairly rare Z for 400 Pontiac as fifth digit. The shirts would ALWAYS ignore my requests for code Z-400 Pontiac parts and give me Code R Olds or Code X Buick parts! "You sure that ain't an Olds?" Yes moron Come look under the hood if you don't believe me!

I got so tired of getting the wrong parts from the "shirts" that I memorized the entire VIN- 2J57Z7P201498!! I haven't had that darn car for over 20 years and can still remember that darn number. That Pontiac engine ran great, however it are fuel pumps, starters and water pumps ever 30K or so and spark plugs every 15, so I needed the right parts often! Bought it with 42K on it and sold it with 198K. Rust bucket, but it still ran good.

 

[forresth]

I went into an autoparts store looking for a gasket kit for a 225 Jeep V6 from a 71 (Jeep purchased the rights to that engine from Buick, then later sold it back to Buick, it became the 3.8 still in use today). The guy said "that's in inline engine" then tells starts to tell me his price. I stop him and say "why would I buy the wrong parts from you, no matter what the price?"

 

[35Rem]

How fast does one have to rub their hands together to get the oil viscosity up to 50 weight?

 

[jframe]

What?! You mean that using my brakes actually wears them out? Man! Those engineers have to do better!

There is no context within which The Shirt's statement about damaging my car could be evaluated as correct. As you note, the pads and discs are supposed to wear each other away. More importantly, as a matter of cost, the rate at which semi-metallics eat my shiny new rotors is completely irrelevant. I changed both discs and four pads for just under $85, including 6.75% sales tax. Suppose these discs last only 50,000 miles because I use semi-metallic pads, but they'd last 60,000 miles using organic. Does it really matter? Of course not. $85 in 50,000 miles vs. $85 in 60,000 miles changes the total cost of operating a car so little that any assertion is rightly laughed away.

What I'm about to say will be controversial to some participating in this thread, but I disagree that the drive to provide inexpensive aftermarket auto parts is a scourge. On the contrary, I think it a boon. I could have gone to Ford for the same parts and probably paid $200. Even if the parts from Ford were actually better (which I *highly* doubt), there is no way the increased quality could even begin to offset the massive difference in costs. Cheap auto parts exist because that's what the consumers want, and because I'd rather change my discs and pads twice in five years for $170 than I would to change them once for $200.

And let's dispense with any hint that OEM's don't also want the cheapest parts. Oh, they want the cheapest parts like a hormone-crazed teenage boy wants the touch of the girl next door. OEM's entire purchasing process is *built* on a competitive bidding process that provides the cheapest possible parts that meet spec.

What I *don't* want is advice about perceived superiority of parts. It is unlikely that Shirts at any parts counter, whether discount chain or dealer, really knows enough to make such judgements.

Fortunately, I DO know that factory parts are superior. After this many years in a dealership, I have too many customers who come to me, be it Nissan, Toyota, Ford, Suzuki, or whatever, and tell me that they should have come to me first. I guess it all just depends on how much you like wrenching on your own stuff. Personally, I hate it, so I make sure I make my choices on parts AND labor based on experience, and that experience tells me that factory parts and service are second to none, and I'd much rather spend my money to do it right the FIRST time, and go that route.

 

[David LaPell]

If you really want to have fun with the parts kid, go in and ask for stuff that doesn't exist.

Like the time I asked for a Sonic Screwdriver.

Or when I asked for two bushings, I told them they were shaped like nipples.

Ask for a self regenerating battery.

Tell them the cheap way to test a battery is to take a 9/16th wrench across both posts. You will be surprised how many you can get to do that. Once.

Ask for a bottle of high test blinker fluid

Ask of they have left handed wrenches

Ask of they have a high beam back up light

Ask them if they have a 10 inch brake drum for a Vespa moped.


I am so glad the local parts store here abouts has some one that knows things. If I go anywheres else I feel like I am trying to explain a camcorder to a caveman.

 

[tyusclan]

I remember the days when we still had mom and pop auto parts stores. If you traded there a few times, the owner knew your name. If you brought in a part and laid it on the counter, he would say, ’Got one in the back, I’ll get it.’ These were the folks who knew cars and the parts that made them run and they took pride in that knowledge. Things never seem to change for the better.

Thankfully, we still have a small chain of locally-owned and family run auto parts stores in our area. They have one in just about every town in the three or four surrounding counties. They do hire young guys in the stores, but they all have older hands on deck to help the young guys out.

I buy nearly all my parts from these guys. The ONLY time I go to Auto Zone, Advanced or O'Reilly's is if something breaks on a Sunday, and I have to have the vehicle on Monday. Otherwise, I buy from the hometown folks.

 

[DeathGrip]

We still have one local parts store. They have several stores in the county. Most of their staff is pretty good but being me I can throw them a curve once in a while. They seem to enjoy the challenge. The reason we have fun is I don't pressure them because I know what and how much business they do.
About after market parts, Some are good and some are junk. If you know which is which they can be a good cost reducer, If you don't then they can be a headache. I'll say this, The Discount stores don't hold a candle to a good old fashion parts man.

 

[G-Mac]

Tell them exactly what you want and they need to look it up . What year is the car. 1932 Ford/350 chevy/350trans/8inch ford/a/c. Then you get the deer in the headlites....

How true!!!! I was building a trailer and needed some lug nuts. I bought the 3500lb.. axle w/hubs and wheels/tires at Tractor Supply. I told the kid at Auto Zone what size lug nuts I needed....

....his next question, of course, was....."Year, make, and model of car?"

Unfortunately, computers have replaced actual knowledge of automotive mechanics with most of these people.

 

[cballman]

I have waited to post for a reason. I was one of those SHIRT people for over 20 years. When I started the callers used to ask if we had the part and what brand was it. In later years after Advance, AutoZone, and O'Reillys came to town the questions then were "do you have the part and then how much is it?" Granted the OE parts are sometimes better but in the early years they were about twice to three time the cost. Now they finally have brought the price down to a managable difference. But then again as I have told many people over the years. Its your money and you have to spend it where you think you can get the best product. I have heard many stupid things uttered by people on both sides of the counter. But I will leave you with one that I think is awesome. I had a Lady come into our store and ask if the product she had purchased elsewhere would work as told by their salesman. She had a bottle of liquid that said Engine Tune-up, The person she purchased this from told her that if she used that in her fuel tank that she didnt need to purchase spark plugs, wires, cap or rotor because this would take care of it. She got upset when I told her that statement was not true. BUT she went back to store A and bought everything because the person wouldnt lie to her. Wouldnt even give me a chance to price quote her on anything. Our prices were compareable to the big box stores. That is why I have always tried to be honest and upfront with every customer. So it does really go both ways. But then again if you read another thread we have kids who just want a check and dont care if they know or learn anything or not.

 

[LVSteve]

Fortunately, I DO know that factory parts are superior.

Sadly, this was not always the case with cars designed in the 1970s. Here is my example.

Back in England I owned a small GM car that had the "big" 2.3 motor in it. Remember, in England a 2.3 is considered a large motor. GM in their infinite wisdom upgraded the brakes some, but not nearly enough. I discovered this one fine morning approaching a crossroads to make a turn when the brake pedal was solid but the car only reluctantly slowed. Yes, I had been driving fast on typical British roads and this had worked the brake pad material beyond its heat capacity. The fix was relatively simple, fit a set of aftermarket brake pads made for a newer Ford Capri GT. The pad material resisted fade MUCH better, although they did require a little extra foot pressure when cold. A price worth paying, IMHO.

 

[GaryS]

What??? I called a Buick dealer, talked to the service manager and he said all I needed was a long extension for the socket wrench. I did have to remove the brace that goes from the fender to the radiator housing. That battery was squeezed into one tiny space but I changed it, despite bloody knuckles, scratched hands, etc. Who designs these things?

Someone who is quite sure that he will never, ever, have to repair it!

This thread is humorous, but I can see it from the other side too.

My family owned an auto salvage business for about 60 years. I pretty much grew up there, working weekends and school vacations. Even after I went into another field full time, I helped out on my days off.

My father had a couple of fairly strict policies. He preferred to deal with body shops, garages, and dealers. He tried to avoid selling to the DIY crowd unless he knew the customer. A lot of DIY customers liked to diagnose by parts replacement. So, if they thought it was the alternator, they'd buy one. When it turned out not to be, they wanted a refund. Same with starters and most other electrical parts.

His policy was to offer a replacement parts, not a cash refund.

He had a sign over the counter that said, "Our parts are guaranteed not to be defective. They are not guaranteed to fix your problem."

Another trick that customers tried to pull was to claim that the competition down the road had the same part for $10.00 less. Which was a lot of money back then. Dad would kindly suggest that they customer buy it from them since he couldn't match the price. They'd then confess that the competition didn't actually have the part in stock. To which he'd reply that the next time he was out of stock the customer could have all he wanted free.

No wonder I hated retail.

The funniest, and it's only funny if you have warped sense of humor like mine, was a guy who wanted a used part for a brand new Hyundai. This was about 3 months after the brand was introduced in the US, so no one had used parts. The guy wouldn't listen, swore, yelled, accused of of being racists, and then go into his car and peeled out of the driveway. Right into a telephone pole.

 

[Herknav]

Fortunately, I DO know that factory parts are superior.

I heard you the first time, but it's still not univerally true. Can you point me to a Willys or AMC dealership?

Of course, the trick with an AMC (Another Maker's Car) is knowing WHICH factory parts to order (Delco or Motorcraft). Just pray you don't actually have an AMC engine in it.