Weekend get-a-way

[Retired LTC USAR]

The wife and I decided to get away last weekend since I didn't have to work on Monday (Presidents Day). We went to Cumberland Falls State Park. I had never been there or seen Cumberland Falls even though I grew up 30 miles from there.

Got there Saturday midway. Took a walk around the park Saturday evening and noticed signs posted that talked about bear sightings and what to do and not to do.

Told the wife (as I patted my vest pocket) that if a bear started to attack us, I had five shots to kill it. I was carrying a M60. I then said that if I didn't kill it in 4 shots, the fifth shot was going in her knee. She looked at me with a look of "You would shoot me" and said why? I asked her what would happen to her if I shot her in the knee. She replied that she would fall down, and that I would then run away.

I just started laughing and we kept on walking.

Never did see any ears.

 

[BAM-BAM]

I would sleep lightly for awhile............................

Do you remember that Bobbit incident?

 

[Triathloncoach]

You have a good wife.

 

[Watchdog]

That joke's older than I am.

 

[steelslaver]

Check all your food carefully and always wait for her to fall asleep first for the rest of your life.

Women have a different sense of humor than men, and they never really forget.

You might be lucky and she just thought "He is just being a dumb *** again"

 

[TX-Dennis]

Yup . . . be careful. My wife still doesn't trust me after I told her a yarn about wild chihuahuas in the Chihuahuan Desert, and that was 20 years ago.

Okay for those who must know . . .

When in the Chihuahuan Desert one must stay alert for any dust clouds on the horizon. It could be a sign of an approaching pack of wild chihuahuas. Those little dogs are like piranhas. One can't really hurt you much, but they run in packs of hundreds. A pack of wild chihuahuas can take down and eat deer, hogs, elk, cattle, and even the occasional human.

At the time I was just having fun spinning out a yarn. I had no idea she believed it. I got into a good deal of "trouble" after she told her coworkers about it, and they laughed at her gullibility.

 

[Ivan the Butcher]

The wife and I are both 62. She is in much better shape than I am. In the hopeless bear attack, my knees are toast, and she get richer! However I believe he firepower and mine combined just might save me, as long as she's not too mad at me.

Ivan