I,too, offer my heartfelt condolences for the loss of your mom. I have been "next" for some time. I am 5 years older than my BIL, who is #2.
You know, I can remember when I was too young to do some of the things I I wanted to do. But my family and my circle of friends was growing. I was having new experiences and gradually getting old enough to do more things.
Now, as you point out, the que has advanced until I'm next. My family and circle of friends is shrinking. I have done just about everything I'm ever going t do. Not too many new experiences lie ahead. And I face an ever growing list of things that I am now too old to do.
Putting it all together really helps to put "FULL CIRCLE" in perspective.
This was not meant as a complaint, more, an observation. This is how it works. I'm just focusing on getting the most out of the time I have left.
To quote Jasper Fant in "Lonesome Dove", I'm not here for a long time, I'm here for a good time.