Advise on buying a wedding ring

Well guys its time for me to get Married !

Kind of a late start for me, 55,but I have been with my girlfriend going on 18 years now and well I have been a dumb-- for not doing it much sooner. I would explain but its a story for another day,lol

I am going to start looking for a ring and well I have no idea in what direction to start.

Of course I can go right to a jewelry shop but knowing what to expect is an honest deal is way beyond me. I just am not sure who/where to trust.

I have heard of diamond brokers but again would not really know how to begin.

Any thoughts on a great starting point or another route to consider?

Also I am very concerned to buy a Reg Mag priced ring and she might not like it? I would just buy her a Reg Mag but I think she would prefer the ring.
Do they do exchanges or credit?

Congrats! At least one of the jewelry stores around here let's you select the stone. Then they put it in a plain setting. After you give her the ring, you both go back and pick out a setting to put your stone into. Basically, you pick the rock, she picks the setting and you pay for both.

If I ever get married again, she's getting a rubber band. If that's a deal breaker, it'll be a sign.

My heartiest congratulations. We are heading into year #39.

Remember that a wedding ring is like a tourniquet.

They both cut off your circulation.

Paplinker, are you looking for an engagement ring or a wedding ring? One is typically a diamond, and the other is typically a simple gold band. The diamond engagement ring is a whole lot more expensive.

If your idea is you want to surprise her with a wedding proposal and a ring, that's traditionally an engagement ring. The wedding ring is normally exchanged at the ceremony itself, or, worn after the ceremony.

I bought my first wife an expensive engagement ring. That marriage didn't work out. My second, and hopefully last(!) wife, with whom I have been happily together now for over 35 years, we, too, lived together for a number of years before marriage. In our case, when we decided to legally marry, we had a simple civil ceremony and bought wedding rings after we were married. (And, for what it's worth, neither of us wear them any more.)

Thinking about this, maybe you should discuss this with your fiancée? Be sure that if you buy an expensive engagement ring it is one she likes (or maybe she would rather use the money for a honeymoon, etc.) Or, after 18 years, maybe she'd prefer just to keep it to a simple wedding ring...

Rustyt1953 said:

My heartiest congratulations. We are heading into year #39.

Remember that a wedding ring is like a tourniquet.

They both cut off your circulation.

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Onomea said:

Paplinker, are you looking for an engagement ring or a wedding ring? One is typically a diamond, and the other is typically a simple gold band. The diamond engagement ring is a whole lot more expensive.

If your idea is you want to surprise her with a wedding proposal and a ring, that's traditionally an engagement ring. The wedding ring is normally exchanged at the ceremony itself, or, worn after the ceremony.

I bought my first wife an expensive engagement ring. That marriage didn't work out. My second, and hopefully last(!) wife, with whom I have been happily together now for over 35 years, we, too, lived together for a number of years before marriage. In our case, when we decided to legally marry, we had a simple civil ceremony and bought wedding rings after we were married. (And, for what it's worth, neither of us wear them any more.)

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I am after a engagement ring.
She kind of knows its coming sometime. We did discuss some that at this point in our life we would likely go big on the ring and honeymoon but a private ceremony. Hopefully this will stay the course. I really want to get her a great ring.

The best advise I was given, but didn't take, DON'T DO IT! If it ain't broke, don't try to fix it.

I'd let her pick them out

paplinker said:

I am after a engagement ring.
She kind of knows its coming sometime. We did discuss some that at this point in our life we would likely go big on the ring and honeymoon but a private ceremony. Hopefully this will stay the course. I really want to get her a great ring.

Click to expand...

If she knows it's coming, you should both shop for it. That way she get's what she wants.

Just get out and start looking at some. You'll eventually recognize a fair deal.
Like buying anything.
Congratulations!

Advice: Don't buy at a "Mall Jeweler" Like Zales
Go to an independent jewelry store that has an in house gemologist and bench jeweler.
As a Pawnbroker I can tell you if you are looking for a deal, pawn shop is the way to go. IF they regularly deal in higher end jewelry.
Educate yourself on diamond grading. A GIA (Gemology Institute of America) certification is best.

Here is a link to some of the best information available on the internet.
How to Purchase the Perfect Diamond Engagement Ring

My opinion, a stunning 3-stone ring would be very appropriate, past, present, future.

Rich I like the ones like this. It's sort of a combo engagement/wedding ring. All of my wives, now ex's, liked them.

Pawngal, post 12. That right there.

Done it 3 times, lost half my **** twice. If'n I had it to do all over I would without hesitation. I've been with the Mrs 16 years, married 11+, I'll stay if she keeps me. Go for it and check the Jewelry Exchange (nationwide) for a ring. They have all kinds from $300 to $300K. Best of luck. I was your age when I got hitched, this time. Joe

43.5 years ago we got married, about 1.5 years before that we went together and picked out a ring. There is a whole bunch of BS out there now about how much you should spend! They hype is typically equal to 3 years take home pay! BS< BS<BS!

I had a budget of 2 months pay and ended up with a ring that cost 3 months take home ($1200 and change). 51 point (% of a Carat) Emerald cut (square cut). I had priced a equal replacement 5 years later and the same store wanted $7000.

Nobody is going to give you gold and diamonds for less than they are worth! Looks for Cut, Color, Carat (weight) and Clarity. Stay away from yellow! Stay away from "Inclusions" (cracks or carbon lines or spots at 10 power)!

Opinion on size: 1/2 to 3/4 carat is a nice size but not flashy. 3 carats or bigger can be seen across any room, and attract thieves like you wouldn't believe! My wife can get gloves on over her half carat diamond, Mom had a 2.5 carat cocktail ring, you'll never get a glove over it! (Think about year round wearing in Pa.!) There is a price premium on any stone over 1 carat, and again at 5 carats, so the otherwise same stone is 15 to25% less expensive at 99 or 98 points than at 1 carat!

My wife prefers white gold to yellow gold, that is an extra 10 to 15% because of the platinum!

Think of her and your birth stones (most months have a precious and a semi-precious stone) Some look a lot nicer than others, but a mixture of the stones can be quite stunning!

Engagement rings are a late 1890 invention! Wealthy people gave Pledge gifts of necklaces or bracelets before that. My dad picked up at a show a royal princess' engagement necklace from around 1820. It was about 150 1/2 carat emeralds set in white gold, that followed the neck line of a low cut dress. (one of the earliest pieces of of white gold jewelry, and one of the most stunning necklaces I ever saw, it was looted during WWI, and in 1974 dad bought it for $700. In 1980-81 it sold at auction for around $20 grand. (The next owner identified what princess/ royal house it was from and the value was much higher but undisclosed!) All that said meaning, you are allowed to think outside the Diamond Store box!

Ivan

58 years in November.........Best deal I ever made.

If you just have to do it, listen to pawngal.

I see lots of couples in my pal's pawn shop when I'm in there to pick up my latest auction win. He's a crusty old goat, but he turns into a big teddy bear and gives extra special care to couples looking for wedding hardware. His selection is huge.

To paraphrase a celebrity being interviewed about his future plans:

If I ever feel the urge to get married again I think I'll just find a woman I don't like and buy her a house.

Being in the business at the time, my father's partner told the dealer we deal with in NYC I needed an engagement ring. 1.03 caret and no cost for the setting for 2 K. 59 facets.
Diamond was not that big of a deal to me, but saying after shooting my
Colt Python and saying "That you for the nice revolver!" I had to marry her!
LOL!

Go to a well established jeweler. Best is a family business. Someone with a reputation to maintain. Sit down with her and the gemologist. narrow it down to 3 stones, have her describe a setting and get measured. She leaves room. You pick the diamond. Pay. Pick it up when ready, Make a date, buy her lunch, take her for a walk. Bingo!