Closing out an Estate

I was the executor of my parents estate after both passed, dad being the last. All that was left was a house badly in need of repairs. My brother and sister stepped back and let me do what was needed. I had no intention of fixing it up, so planned to find someone who would buy it in its poor condition.

One of my nieces who still lived in the neighborhood had a realtor "friend" who made an offer to buy the house as is.
I thought the offer was too low but not a bad option to just unload the house.

Then an old neighbor told me about a realtor who had a relationship with house flippers. The realtor was a Bronx born guy, still living in the hood who played for the Boston Red Sox, named Mike Nagy.
He presented the house to a couple of flippers and the offers took off. We were offered 33% more than the "friend" of my niece, and much more than we ever thought the house was worth.

DONE deal!
The only debt I had to pay was a nursing home bill. We split the money three ways down to the penny, no hurt feelings throughout the whole process.
 
I sympathise. Never again! My brother was a CPA and formerly CFO of a major international construction company. You would think his personal stuff would be in better order…
Besides, I found out by accident that his lawyer was also his ex's lawyer and that they were constantly working with her, apparently with a view of her gaining control of the estate. "For the kids," of course. What a zoo.
 
My father left a small estate, with myself and 3 brothers. He had a will, which simply left everything equally to his children. Dad chose the executor based on geography...the brother that lived a 1/2 mile away got the job. We got an appraisal of the home, the four of us got the right to buy it for that price, all of us passed. Next the offer went to extended family, a niece bought it for the appraised price, proceeds divided equally. There was some cash divided equally. Then came the stuff, we all picked what we wanted without any disagreement. Then came the gun collection...about 20 pieces. Met at the house and opened up the safe. We assigned a number to each gun, put those numbers in a basket and we all drew until all the numbers were picked. We then matched our number to a gun to see what we were taking home. Even with 4 siblings, it was an easy, stress free, argument free settlement of the estate.... being a close family definitely helped. And then there's the other extreme, a neighbor that left a large estate. His kids fought each other in court for four years before it was finally settled.
 
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444 Magnum said:
^^^ This. Don't be shy about it. Each state has their own laws. In Georgia, the executor is basically entitled to 5% of all moneys that pass through the estate account from personal property and 3% of real estate.
You're entitled to it and you'll earn every penny of it. Ask the probate attorney about it and see what compensation your state allows.
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This^^^^^^^ my sister was the executor of her Nextdoor neighbor's estate. The daughter was a degenerate drug user who could not be trusted. Even with a house that was paid for. Lots of headaches over several months. I think my sister got $8k for her troubles. Which involved having daughter removed from house that she moved into without permission.
 
Finding an attorney that is experienced, honest and you can deal (ie communicate) with is a key accomplishment. They can make things go smoothly.

It might be too late to help but there is a resource called Nolo Press.
They publishes dozens of book on various parts of the law. Some of the relevant titles are Estate Planning, Make Your Living Trust, and one that I have is The Executor's Guide.
They are great guides on what to do, written in clear English, and describe some of the differences found in each State.
 
JeffD607 said:
I wish you the best of luck! I just went through this myself. My father passed away and I was Executor. That was about a 3 year process. After he passed away, we noticed that he was doing a great job of hiding my step-mother's dementia. Now I end up as her POA and executor and she had two daughters, the good one and the evil one. The good one wanted nothing to do with the finances and we followed the will to the letter. The evil daughter just sat back, did nothing, collected her share of the money, and criticized. It's a "NO WIN" situation!
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When the opportunity for "FREE MONEY!" presents itself in an estate situation, family members who have been always been nice, pleasant, forthright, etc., often undergo dramatic change. The shark dorsal fins start popping out of the backs people you would never have guessed would behave that way. The infighting usually results in hard feelings between the adversaries that never heal.
 
My father went through a bunch of crap with his relatives when his grandfather died without a written will so I long ago wrote out a will and had it reviewed by an estate attorney to make sure I didn't miss anything.
They suggested a few corrections and additions and then had it typed up with all the proper legal language and had their staff of legal assistants act as witnesses when I signed two copies of it, one for me and one that is kept at the attorney's office.
It clearly states who gets what with a clause that stipulates that anybody who challenges any part of the will gets nothing.
Every year I review it and usually add or remove a firearm or two as I continue to buy and trade them and if I do change it I have two copies of the revised version signed, dated, and stamped by a notary and give one copy to the attorney's office for their records and place the other copy in my gun safe along with the original and the attorney's info and my vehicle titles and other documents.
 
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Often family members who feel they were constantly cheated and shortchanged , had parents who were mean and selfish and stingy see an estate as way to make up for it.
Recall a news story I saw on Yahoo! years ago about an elderly widow whose husband died leaving her owing $239,000 on a home equity loan. One friend, Dear Old Dad died-same thing. And the house was run down. Another friend, their mother died, the house was in a very depressed housing market. The one brother wanted his share NOW. That led to a rupture.
My one lawyer-friend with some experience handling estates, wills, trusts said an executor should be someone with experience who is neither family nor friend , outside the loop so to speak, can be non-partisan, objective, not subject to blandishments or bullying. he was skeptical of self help legal books, noting they were either too generic and tended to overlook case law.
 
Anyone ever read "Bleak House" by Charles Dickens? A subplot in the story is a series of lawsuits over an estate. The subplot is based on the true story of an estate that was argued over for 117 years, and eventually ended because the entire estate had been spent on legal fees. It's known as Jennens v Jennens.

www.historyfacts.co.uk

Jennens vs. Jennens: The 117-Year Legal Battle That Inspired Charles Dickens

The intestate status of wealthy William Jennens unsigned will in 1798 meant that 117 years of legal wrangling followed. It inspired Charles Dickens.
www.historyfacts.co.uk www.historyfacts.co.uk

So, you know, it could be worse!
 
An old man was dying so he wrote out a will and had it reviewed by his lawyer.
The lawyer read it and said, "I see that you left all your personal property and possessions along with any money in your bank account to your wife but also left $250K to each of your three adult children." "If you intend to leave everything to your wife then how are your children suppose to get their $250K?"
The old man says, "They can damn well work for like I did."
 
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Some advice for all of us. An accounting firm in the city where I used to work developed what they called a Personal Estate Answer Book. This is the greatest thing since sliced bread for helping deal with your estate after you pass away. The details this book is set up for is amazing. I'm talking about getting down to the songs you want played at the funeral. I wrote down in this book where to find the keys for the cabinets in the basement and where to find the documents that will have the combinations to the safes. All of the bank accounts are listed in one place. There is a page for contact information for the friends and family all in one place. There is another spot to reveal where to find important documents. It will make things tremendously easier for whoever administers your estate. Check with your respective accountants or estate attorneys to see if they have anything like this.
 
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Golddollar said:
Some advice for all of us. An accounting firm in the city where I used to work developed what they called a Personal Estate Answer Book. This is the greatest thing since sliced bread for helping deal with your estate after you pass away. The details this book is set up for is amazing. I'm talking about getting down to the songs you want played at the funeral. I wrote down in this book where to find the keys for the cabinets in the basement and where to find that documents that will have the combinations to the safes. All of the bank accounts are listed in one place. There is a page for contact information for the friends and family all in one place. There is another spot to reveal where to find important documents. It will make things tremendously easier for whoever administers your estate. Check with your respective accountants or estate attorneys to see if they have anything like this.
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Good info.

We updated POA, Wills, Trusts, etc when we moved to a new state. Everything has been taken care of by a very thorough and competent attorney. Our heirs will be happy we went and got this done. More for them, less for probate.

We had our very good neighbors introduced to family via emails to let them know who was who. Primarily in case we both pass at the same time.The neighbors hold the house keys.

Recently my BIL and SIL, the executors, came for a visit, and they were able to meet the neighbors face to face. It was like they knew each other for a lifetime, probably because we share family stories with each other.

My sister and her husband have nothing on paper, not because of her, but him. He has the attitude of letting family figure it out. I wouldn't want to be around for that one.
 
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Was executor for two elderly family members. Two pieces of advice from experience

If a house has a reverse mortgage and housing market goes down or house is poor condition the deceased may owe more than what you can sell house for. Ran into this. Had to execute a deed in lieu of foreclosure. Bank which hold the reverse mortgage had to agree to it. Basically gave the house to the bank.

If a person is on Medicaid and dies there is a Law Called the Medicaid Recovery Act. States will place a lien on the estate until the Medicaid Money is paid back.

Being an executor can be a real pain if the deceased didn't have their affairs in good order.
 
I was executor for my Dad's estate, but it was quite simple. All bank and investment accounts had beneficiaries, so did not go into the estate. The estate consisted only of his home (and personal property which was minimal) which is inherited equally by me and my son with the provision that his wife can live there the rest of her life. The home was considered his separate property in Texas since he owned it before the marriage. He left no debts.

She owned her own home as well which she rented for about 20 years then sold and invested the proceeds which along with her family farm will go to her remaining offspring whenever she passes.
 
The one thing I have going for me, nobody cares!

As far as family goes, my aunt gets everything. She wasn't the first choice, but she's the last of the family of 11 bros and sis. As far as 1st cousins, I'm the last and by far the youngest of that generation, by 15+ years. I never knew any of them because they were already adults and on their own when I was growing up. 2nd cousins, no idea. That's the reason there's no fighting over anything, no one cares and/or wants the junk left over. Add to that, no one really liked my uncle. He died a lonely man.

The only debt my uncle had was a mortgage. He had way more than enough money, he could've paid off at any time. Why he didn't, I have no clue.

The mortgage company, a national bank wouldn't tell me all the information I needed even after I gave him the legal paperwork AND they pulled my credit. And when I asked him about parking the house money, even though they had his death certificate on file and other paperwork, it was like puling teeth. To the guy's credit, he said, "I want to tell you, but bank policy forbids me..."

My uncle had a safe deposit box at another national bank. I gave them my legal paperwork, and they wouldn't even tell me if I was at the right branch. Then there was cost of having the box drilled out. My aunt had a key, but lost it. There were/are so many needless problems my aunt caused.

My uncle had the same accountant that I do and she told me we're OK as far as taxes.

Other taxes, my aunt can deal with that when she gets the money.

All I care about is getting everybody paid off
 
Ματθιας said:
My uncle had the same accountant that I do and she told me we're OK as far as taxes.

Other taxes, my aunt can deal with that when she gets the money.

All I care about is getting everybody paid off
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Word of advice from experience, don't disburse all the funds until the final estate tax return has been filed. Estates don't get any 'standard deductions' and the taxes can be significant if the estate had income. If you're the executor, it's your job to file the estate return, not your aunts. Do your homework, take your time, and get EVERYTHING settled before final disbursements are made-even if it means waiting until the next tax season. It's hard to get the money back once it's out there.
 
As executor of my Mother's will, I just spent well over a year trying to settle the estate. Many days were like full work days for me. I thought my Mother was well-prepared in her planning for the event. Comparatively, she probably was. Still , a lot of work. Countless phone calls, emails, visits to financial institutions, affidavits, lawyer meetings, probate, and much more.

My Mother was not a wealthy woman. I was most fortunate in that my brother and sisters were cooperative through all this; never any dissension or harsh words and everyone pitched in if necessary. I chose not to pay myself a fee for the work (that's taxable income, not inheritance funds) but I'll not censure those who pay themselves. They probably deserve it.
 
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When my mother-in-law died the oldest daughter was the executor. Unfortunately for her I handled my MIL's finances and (per MIL's wishes) I had set up all her accounts as POD/TOD with equal distributions to each child. She had long sold her house to move to assisted living so she was left with nothing but financial assets. Pay/Transfer on Death accounts pass outside the estate so my SIL couldn't get her hands on the cash. Plus they get paid out quickly. All Fidelity needed was a death certificate and names/addresses/SS#/wire transfer instructions of the beneficiaries. It was all done in a couple of weeks.

The only thing that wasn't POD/TOD was her checking account. That was a joint account with my wife. We used that to pay her final bills and then ended up distributing the remaining equally to the siblings months later.

You should have seen the look on the oldest daughter's face when she found out she had no power. I'm not saying she could have stolen anything as I knew what was where. But she would have been a giant pain for everybody to deal with. She would have dragged it out trying to figure out a way to her hands on it. Mostly to screw her siblings rather than out of greed.

My MIL had expressed misgivings about the oldest daughter but she thought she had to appoint one so the oldest got it. But it was more a family political appointment. It couldn't be anybody else as the other two are totally unreliable. My wife could have served as executor but since I handled her finances I thought that inappropriate. That would have caused even more problems as it would make the other siblings suspicious.

There wasn't much of an estate to handle. They were left to squabble over her personal possessions. They made noises and started demanding stuff from me. They wanted to audit the accounts but I (purposely) did not keep paper or digital statements. I didn't have too as Fidelity had years of them online. Once she passed I lost access, the accounts were locked. I told them they'd have to get that information from Fidelity. Fidelity told them to get a court order. That ended that.

I don't think they recognize how much trouble I saved them all.
 
When my step brother's step father died my step mother told me to come and Get one of Bill's guns he liked you and would want you to have one. I never went. Then one day she showed up at my door with a Winchester model 21 12 gauge double and said here take this. My preference to let everyone else go first in situations like that worked out pretty well.

When my one sister died, she left some notes as to the disposition of "things" there was some arguing and the daughter started in with "I have her power of attorney so what I say goes ''. This happened to be the spoiled one who was the chief reason for the arguing. The look on her face when I informed her that the power of attorney died at the exact same time my sister did was priceless.
 
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steelslaver said:
The look on her face when I informed her that the power of attorney died at the exact same time my sister did was priceless.
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A little fact that a whole lot of people do not understand and/or realize. My mother thought that she did not have to name an executor because, after all, my sister and I already have power of attorney. No mom, it doesn't work that way.
 
I was exec for both father and mother. Problem was, mother named my sibling as co-exec. If sibling hadn't been a lifelong grifter, it might have worked out.
Before mom's body cooled, sibling litigated me - and then dragged it out for a year until their attorney finally caught wise to the BS and steered it to a conclusion. This after Herculean efforts on grifter sibling's part to accuse me of crimes which would have allowed grifter sibling to sue me and take my house and possessions. The accusations being made of whole cloth and forgery on grifter siblings part were dismissed in short order, but attorneys don't work for free. I figure, along with my attorney, grifter sibling cost us $250,000.00 conservatively.
I did all the work, sibling did all the roadblocking and false accusations, not to mention falsifying documents, etc.
Mom had a car and a house, very little in the bank. Nothing to fight over actually, but grifter sibling did anyway.
Grifter sibling also caused problems for Dad's estate, but as sole exec, I shut grifter sibling down and fairly distributed it with the help of estate lawyer, all documented and accounted for. Grifter sibling strip mined Dad's house before I could go through it and took everything that could be sold, leaving me precious little by way of memento.
Money doesn't change anyone - it reveals them.
 
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Have holdings in a trust. Daughter gets it all. No ceremony. Headstone in place with only date of death missing. Prepaid cremation. Trusted son-in-law has 50cal ammo box to put in ashes and dig hole on my plot next to my mother, drop can in kick in dirt and walk away. By doing this have what i want and my daughter has no pressure with stress or decisions. Easy peassy.
 
Yes, I've also found a trust works very well. Not inexpensive, but money well spent. Everything is spelled out on your terms, fewer potential headaches, and you don't have to deal with probate proceedings. We update and/or change our trust provisions every few years as necessary. This sort of stuff is not one of those areas where you want to take the cheap route.
 
My family had my father's mother's curse on people that messed with us. Brother"s wife called me a a-#$%^ in front of my parents for only caring about myself. That was totally a lie. 500 days (over a 10 year period) I chauffeured POP and sometimes Mom to lunch for gas and lunch with his living older sisters until they passed. Helped him turn a manuscript into a published book. Drove up and down the east coast to find them Eldorados, while she did practically nothing and lived in a house no one wanted to visit (pig sty) while we had family get togethers on our dime. She got her due when her mother went to sleep and never woke up just a few days after Pop passed. Thanks grandma Eva.

Same brother's wife was trying to get me to buy an expensive urn for my parents co-mingled ashes. I told her to go pound sand. Wife did not want their ashes in my house. I carry their DNA in every cell in my body, no ashes needed.
 
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Thank God I'm an only child. My wife passed last year and have a durable health care POA, a POA with my son and daughter and they are already on all my CU accounts. Son and grandsons will have a Big time dividing up guns and ammo. Have told them if they bicker I'll haunt them, lol. Daughter and granddaughters already got the wife's jewelry which was quite a lot….
 
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