Elder abuse opinions needed

[venomballistics]

I agree.

Just reading the drama in this thread gives me chills.

and I watered that down considerably.
I have to be very mindful of what I do in my own back yard until this resolves one way or another. Any misstep that might somehow be construed as an attempt to make contact with either will likely be weaponized. It's just what she does.

 

[Huskerguy]

Many years ago we had a younger couple with 2 young children as next door neighbors. They were more than just neighbors as they also attended the same church we did and our kids played together and we did things together as couples.

Their relationship went south and all heck broke loose. The father was a tall and athletic guy and the mother was a local girl of a well known citizen rancher/farmer. Well, this thing got nasty from the get go as the lady could go nutso at the drop of a hat and tried to run over him at least twice as I recall.

There was a hearing by the local judge, also an acquaintance but who wasn't in our small town of 4,500? I was called to testify as a neighbor and friend to both - talk about a bad position to be in! The judge asked me a ton of questions and ultimately asked who was the better parent? gulp - I said I thought the woman was more compassionate and caring.

So during the separation the judge said the kids would not be inconvenienced but the parents would be so every two weeks at 3:00 on Sunday afternoon I supervised the "change of the guard" when one left and the other came. Yes, the judge appointed me to be the guardian of the exchange since I was friends with both, knew the kids and they didn't want a police presence.

Moral of the story is sometimes you are going to get involved even if you don't want to. The other side of the coin is to place yourself in the aging person's shoes. Would you want someone to come to your aide in a time of need or just say - not my problem? Hmmm

 

[waffles]

I've worked on/around elder abuse stuff on the financial side. I don't know the state of between beers, but most states have a fairly robust adult protective services infrastructure that doesn't square with the lack of results you're describing. The other posters are right about inserting yourself in family drama, but I know if I were in a similar situation I'd want someone looking out for me. Try reaching out to your local DA or state AG's office to see if there are other avenues you might pursue.

 

[Onomea]

... I don't know the state of between beers...

Well, that's not so bad then, is it?

 

[Skeet 028]

I learned my lesson many years ago...although in a different vein. Guy had a little kid he abused. About 5 and looked 3. We fed him every chance...so did another lady up the street. Kid would eat anything...even spinach. Came to the house one morning when I got home. left side of his head/face black and blue swollen way up. I asked him what happened and he said Danny did it. Only sentence he ever uttered. I asked if he hit him with an open palm or a fist. I demonstrated palm and fist. He held his little fist up. Told my wife the ER nurse to call social services. She did so..later that day SS and the State Police drove up and the kid was with my wife in our yard. They took both kids arrested the UPS and left. 2 weeks later the *** tried to run over me with a car. When they tried to turn onto the main road I pulled him out of the car(through the window). I kinda hurt him a little. luckily there were quite a few witnesses to his attempt to hit me with the car and he had threatened to kill me in front of the police so I didn't get in dutch with the law. Although I put myself in a precarious position I felt I did right...But don't know if I would do it again these days. He had been beat and underfed so much he never did recover. A couple years later the *** died from lead poisoning by one of his drug buddies. Stay away from any serious involvement...you will be much better off even though it is hard to do

 

[chief38]

I lived next door to the "neighbor from hell" for 25 long long years! A complete inconsiderate slob, pig, imbecile and those were his good traits - lol. He was the one huge thorn in our sides about living on an otherwise beautiful block in a great neighborhood. He literally used to make me regret ever buying that house - but alas..... we have moved last January! So far we could not be more pleased with our new neighbors! Brand new homes, brand new neighbors and after 4 months now we could not be happier - what a great difference neighbors can make!

 

[Greyman50]

Knew a family with 3 sons, father was a Big farmer, farmed around 1000, acres IIRC. Father and mother both passed few year apart, 1 son was killed in car crash so the other 2 got everything. After my Dad passed mother had an " estate sale" of sorts. One son of mentioned farm family came by, we started talking. I casually asked how his brother was, he gave me a devilish look and asked, you have not heard. I said no, he replied, let me put it this way, If my brother and I went hunting only one of us would come back alive. Nuf Sed.

 

[Mike SC Hunter]

Glad I don't have neighbors.

 

[venomballistics]

Knew a family with 3 sons, father was a Big farmer, farmed around 1000, acres IIRC. Father and mother both passed few year apart, 1 son was killed in car crash so the other 2 got everything. After my Dad passed mother had an " estate sale" of sorts. One son of mentioned farm family came by, we started talking. I casually asked how his brother was, he gave me a devilish look and asked, you have not heard. I said no, he replied, let me put it this way, If my brother and I went hunting only one of us would come back alive. Nuf Sed.

If the son were released, That is exactly the result I'd anticipate.

 

[venomballistics]

Glad I don't have neighbors.

It used to be that calling my closest neighbor literally incurred long distance charges.
I miss that arrangement sometimes

 

[venomballistics]

Well all ... you've given me a few more leads to package up and give to the grandson to work out.
This has been more about gathering some resources for him more than anything.
I'd prefer to see a victory, but odds lie with a pillaged estate and shady acres
Thank you much all

 

[bigwheelzip]

It's a tough spot for a decent neighbor like you to be in.
If nothing else, sharing this story here highlights for us the value of some proper estate planning.


Sent from my motorola one 5G using Tapatalk