Favorite sayings

[mmaher94087]

Dang!! I cut it off TWICE! And it's still too short.

 

[Old Seabee]

Joke

The air in an elevator always smells different to a midget . OldSeaBee

 

[Onomea]

When someone makes a numerical error my reply will be "Wrong number, Avogadro"

That's a tough one for a liberal arts major. Had to look that one up!

"Does a hundred pounds of flour make a big biscuit?" (An old way of saying, "Well, duh!")

 

[TomkinsSP]

Two from my grandfather...

Its never so bad it can't get worse. (meaning "stop complaining")

Everyone's entitled to one fatal mistake. (meaning "be careful", or "are you sure")

 

[vonn]

You can't fix stupid.

 

[Rpg]

A psychology professor at the university of Texas to a student who had just offered an excuse for not finishing an assignment:

'I think you're peeing in my ear and telling me it's raining'

 

[soFlaNative]

Wait while I go find a crayon...

 

[Jack Flash]

"It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye".
Antoine de Saint-Exupery

 

[sheepdawg]

He's so stupid he couldn't pimp a woman on a troop ship.

 

[GKC]

I grew up hearing these three:

"You got the same shoes to get glad in as you got mad in."

"Would you want your face to freeze like that?"

"Wish in one hand and (expletive) in the other, and see which one fills up first."

When I was young, I resolved NEVER to say them to my children. However, when I actually had children, I found out that they work pretty well.

 

[snubbyfan]

You can fool some of the people all of the time.
All of the people some of the time.
But you can make a fool out of yourself anytime.

 

[Step N. Mud]

He's making me MAD.https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct...=VOd0hESx6nU&usg=AOvVaw2zyIbT2bxWn-3uMe3Em4Jr

 

[eveled]

Looks like the Patriots are going down this time....

Ok, seriously:

It can only get worse.

lol! The Eagles don't have a chance.

 

[78bagger]

Beauty is only skin deep, but stupid goes right to the bone.
It's a poor workman that blames his tools.

 

[JayFramer]

"Dog!"

-My baby niece when she saw a stuffed hedgehog toy.

 

[oldbrownhat]

Just about anything by Mark Twain. His observations are pretty much timeless.

 

[eveled]

Tools make the man, but a blacksmith made the tools!

 

[TOM BECKWITH]

Shoot low men. They're riding Shetlands.
Saw it here years ago, but fits a lot of situations.

 

[Model 19 6"]

Don't take no wooden nickles
My dad use to say boy I am going to knock you into the middle of next week.

 

[pmosley]

Nothing but a hill for a climber. ...................this and a few bible verses have gotten me this far.

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