I need a new throne.

I recently had the same dilemma. It started by attempting to repair the toilet in our master bathroom I couldn't get the gasket between the tank and the bowl to seal. I was carefully and incrementally increasing the torque on the bolts holding ithe tank down when I heard the dreaded "CRACK!" Yep the porcelain cracked it's a goner, I needed a new toilet for my reading room and there's only one thing that will do, a Ferguson. The only toilet endorsed by Al Bundy.

I got on-line, found the nearest distributor with a showroom in Phoenix. I was absolutely giddy with excitement scanning through the pages of their on-line catalog anticipating mounting my new throne and expressing my opinion of the current administration. While searching other websites for prices I found a site with on-line reviews and had my dreams shattered just like the porcelain of my soon to be discarded throne.

It seams Ferguson is the latest victim of out-sourcing and the global economy. They've become nothing more than a name slapped on a piece of cheap Chinese crap that's not even worthy of holding my crap. I'm sure Al is plugged up tighter than the over torqued bolts on my old toilet at just the thought of his beloved Ferguson being made in China.

But all is not lost, I got something almost as good, a Kohler! Lowe's had a couple of models on clearance. The one I got was originally $389 marked down to $111. It's white, it's installed, it doesn't leak, it doesn't gurgle, it's beautiful. My old toilet wasn't even worthy of the name. It came from China, it was too low! When I flushed it, it make this weak, almost apologetic sound. But not the Kohler. It is a "comfort height", a man's height, no more legs falling asleep while reading on the throne. And when you flush it... BaaaWOOOSH! That's a man's flush. A Kohler says, "I'm a toilet. Sit down and give me your best shot." Oh, if only a Kohler could speak, the tales it would tell!

One other piece of advice, have fun disposing of the old one. A .340 Weatherby and shattered porcelain is sure to bring a smile to almost anyone's day...

http://smith-wessonforum.com/lounge/136286-how-dispose-toilet.html
 
Actually I thought I was just gonna slowly eat it away with my .22. You got to go bang 3 times. I'll probably get to bang 50 and still spend less on ammo :D
 
My problem is the fact that some seem so TALL. I'm not short, but I AM short legged. Feel kinda silly with my feet all but swinging back and forth while I sit there. Just a suggestion, Caje, don't know your height, but just saying that you need to look at ALL the variables before this all important purchase.

Ditto. We replaced one several years ago and found that they come in different heights. We elected to get one of the "tall" ones, and it makes the standard heights feel like you are sitting on the floor. Remember, tall is better!
 
Amazing thread.
I am convinced any question can be answered here, any subject advised upon.

You guys are all so full of ............
..knowledge!
:D
 
Whatever you do, go with the oval design. You'll never go back to a round "throne".
 
The Caje is back in bid'ness

Well, it's in. I called my plumber from Lowe's to inquire what commode he liked on his installs. He asked why and I told him about my project. He said to go home and he showed up and installed my flange and told me to call him today when the grout had dried. He showed up with a toilet made by "Gerber" (I wonder........). Anyway he put that sucker in and you have to hold on to loose items when you flush that sucker. Asked him how much and he said one Heniken. Told him no way and he told me a bad thing to go do to myself :D Gawd I do so love being a country lawyer.
 
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There is a response from a woman here. BarbC has made a comment. You'd better be listening. If you want peace with the women in your life, you will listen to the lady's comment. Everything else, from us hairy-legged men, is just noise. The only thing I'll add is that IMHO you are shopping at the right home improvement center.
 
My problem is the fact that some seem so TALL. I'm not short, but I AM short legged. Feel kinda silly with my feet all but swinging back and forth while I sit there. Just a suggestion, Caje, don't know your height, but just saying that you need to look at ALL the variables before this all important purchase.
I knew a guy who was only 4'6" tall and he used to stand on the commode to keep his legs from going to sleep. His brother turned him in to the cops for being, "high on pot".
Peace
gordon:D:D:D:D
 
Wife & daughter left the house for a week and tasked me with putting in a new bathroom floor. I was told to get a new throne - they wanted an elongated bowl rather than a round one.
I'm in Lowe's trying to pick one out and WOW! :eek: Do I get the Excelsior with 5 star flushing or maybe the Kelston. No-wait what about the Cimmaron, the Espree or the Perfecta????? With so many 5 star flushers out there, why in the world would one buy one of the two 4 stars flushers they had on display???. DO I get a one piece or two piece model??? Do I go with the "Quiet Close" seat or the "Quick Release" seat (which begs the question why in the wide world of sports would one need a quick release seat on their throne). The wife and daughters have nixed a horse shoe seat :( . Should I search out used to get a pre 94 model with the full 3.5 gallon BA-WHOOSH or does the new technology work with just one gallon?. Although the time spent sitting is relatively short-it IS what I consider "Quality time" and thus I don't want to wind up with a "High Point" when I ought to have a "Smith & Wesson". I'm leaning towards the Cadet 3 low profile one piece with standard seating and 5 star vortex flushing capacity by American Standard-but I welcome any suggestions


Would it be easier if they let you test a few out? Do they give the 90 day return policy if not satisfied?

:D:D
 
Before we built our house, we went to a Home Show at which an exhibit was displaying a 1.6 gallon toilet from Australia called the 'Caroma.'

They loaded it with five GIANT potatoes. Whooosh! All gone. Then they put it 24 golf balls. Whoosh! All gone. We bought them and have been very satisfied for the last 7 years.

They also had one filled with still-in-the-wrapper Tootsie Rolls, a huge candy jar, if you will, to hold treats for prospective customers. No one would take any, though.
 
Stop, Stop, Stop..I have been laughing so hard , well the PC is close to the bathroom so I'm safe I think, now in my 70s who really knows,,,,I will never look at my outdated toilet ,stool, in the same admiring way. . In fact I have removed from it's presence all reading material...Now that is the ultimate put down to a toilet.....I'm headed to Lowe's....See you later.
 
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